Animals: Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above....

By lbg2msf - 06/11/2013 18:08 - United States - Biloxi

Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 843

You deserved it 9 501

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Same thing different taste

By crazystar69 - 09/03/2011 18:19 - United States

Today, I was walking with my crush, and I told him how I felt. As soon as I turned to him, a bird shit on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 948

You deserved it 4 832

By Anonymous - 16/11/2018 13:30

Today, I was asleep in my back garden and woke up when a bird landed on my hat and took a big shit right in my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 935

You deserved it 473

By birdbath - 08/11/2009 07:26 - United States

Today, I ran into a bird. Not with my car, with my face. It was so scared, it crapped all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 891

You deserved it 3 639

Snap!

By wheelchairgirl - 16/12/2016 01:21 - Denmark

Today, I was watching a beautiful flock of birds flying overhead while walking in the street. The guy next to me was lucky enough to catch bird poop with his forehead. I was lucky enough to get distracted by it, trip, and break my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 380

You deserved it 1 120

From a great height

By Anonymous - 08/05/2021 21:59

Today, I was sitting on the back porch with my husband. I felt two raindrops land on my head, so I said we should go inside because it was starting to rain. It turned out to just be a bird shitting on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 000

You deserved it 100

Nice bird

By Sick - 01/01/2020 01:00 - Netherlands - Ede

Today, a bird shit on my jacket whilst smoking, I cleaned it and went back outside, and got shit on again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 805

You deserved it 987

By pass me the fucking rope - 18/06/2016 13:17 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, just when I thought my day couldn't get any worse, a bird shat on my lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 444

You deserved it 942

All in a day's work!

By Joshtodon - 21/08/2018 22:00

Today, I was unloading tile boxes out of my pickup truck into this lady's garage. As I grabbed the last 50-pound box, a passing bird shat on my forehead. Green ooze ran down my whole face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 811

You deserved it 169

I am very hungry

By I'mSoHungry - 11/01/2020 08:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, a bird flew into the workshop where I work, gave itself a tour of the place, then promptly pooped on my lunch and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 331

You deserved it 197

Rained on

By smellyhand - 16/12/2009 21:11 - United States

Today, it looked like rain so I held out my hand to catch a raindrop. When I finally caught one, I closed my hand over it and ran to show my friends to prove it was raining. I opened my hand saying, "Look! It's raining!" When I looked down, I saw that I had actually caught a bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 792

You deserved it 34 070

Ambient25 24

Thursday 7 November 2013 0:28

I hope you didn't have your mouth open

gc327072 30

Thursday 7 November 2013 0:29

Damn, it's only Wednesday and you're already getting shitfaced? I wanna party with you, OP!

Comments

mooseantlers 1

Thursday 7 November 2013 18:42

never look up at birds... YDI

sythe511 28

Thursday 7 November 2013 19:24

The birds were saying "Watch out!!"

JudgeComrade 17

Thursday 7 November 2013 19:31

The sky is falling, the sky is falling!

lifesacircus 8

Thursday 7 November 2013 20:22

some say that getting pooped on by a bird will bring you good luck.

nadene52 12

Thursday 7 November 2013 21:12

Haha ah that's hilarious we'll atleast your gunna have good luck

JhovannyA 7

Thursday 7 November 2013 21:43

At the wrong place. At the wrong time lol

stewpididiot 11

Friday 8 November 2013 2:00

Chirp, chirp, chirp Ready, aim, Fire !!!

Airborn0280 18

Friday 8 November 2013 2:15

The birds were laughing not chirping.

bikergirl93 18

Friday 8 November 2013 2:35

walk away from the tree b4 u look up

AmorVitae93 6

Friday 8 November 2013 5:47

dude!!! they where chirping to warn you! DUH!

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 479

You deserved it 162

Today, I failed a final presentation. My partner, who did none of the research, presented the entire project, talking over me and glaring when I spoke up. He denied everything and the professor didn't believe me. Now I have to retake this class with the same professor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 605

You deserved it 287

The Top

Today, the guy I had a two-week long fling with and got pregnant by (while on birth control I might add), and who disappeared more than a decade ago after I told him, showed up at my door, demanding shared custody of my daughter. While he is her biological parent, she’s never met him and was terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 824

You deserved it 220

Today, I logged on to Facebook and had 64 notifications. I thought that perhaps I was popular. But no, it was my ten year old sister, liking 64 of my pictures. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 169

You deserved it 6 604

Today, after having spent two weeks planning my husband's surprise birthday party with his friends and family, we get in the car on the way to "dinner" and he says, "I really hope it's just the two of us tonight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 503

You deserved it 349

Today, my soon-to-be ex doesn’t understand why I get so pissed that he has to consult his ex-wife over every little thing we do, including needing her blessing for us to get engaged. It’s none of her damn business, yet he insists he’s merely trying to not hurt her feelings. Fuck him and her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 906

You deserved it 255

Today, I automated a task at work and a day-long procedure ran in a few hours. My boss was completely unimpressed because "I'm not paid to automate stuff, I'm paid to work". FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 748

You deserved it 315

Today, I found out what unwashed, warty feet taste like after someone kicked me in the mouth with one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 266

You deserved it 1 816