Miscellaneous: Today, I wanted to change out of my bikini for the ride home...

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By steph - 20/04/2009 04:11 - United States

Today, I wanted to change out of my bikini for the ride home from the beach. There wasn't a bathroom near, so I went to change in front of a suburban, parked far away from all the people. I took off my suit, hear the car's horn honk, only to find that the car was completely packed with old men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 587

You deserved it 69 143

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Same thing different taste

Spotted

By papergirl - 24/04/2009 15:47 - United States

Today, I went to a fancy restaurant. I was coming right from work and brought a change of clothes with me. I parked in an empty corner of the parking lot to change. As I was pulling my pants up, I noticed that I was facing an apartment complex where an old guy was watching me from his balcony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 283

You deserved it 19 628

By trippiex - 30/11/2019 20:00

Today, I was driving by the carnival and I really had to use the bathroom. I saw a porta-potty next to a house, so I parked in their front yard to use the bathroom very quickly. I came out to see a group of teenage boys urinating on my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 819

You deserved it 853

By FishStampede - 16/05/2009 12:11 - Korea Republic of

Today, I was visiting a national park and went for a swim. Afterwards, I needed to change clothes but the bathrooms were closed. I went off into the woods to change. As soon as I was naked, I heard hooves and sixteen people on horseback rode by. I'd stripped by a horse trail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 951

You deserved it 18 726

By Anonymous - 18/05/2012 19:19 - United States - Paterson

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 455

You deserved it 3 569

By Anonymous - 18/07/2012 17:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went to the beach with a friend. We'd forgotten to get our towels out of the SUV, so I rushed back to the parking lot. I opened the passenger-side door and climbed in to begin my search. After ten seconds or so, I realized I'd busted into someone else's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 601

You deserved it 6 929

Hey guys!

By iannie - 31/07/2011 21:45 - United States

Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 400

You deserved it 39 534

By Embarrassed Swimmer - 11/12/2011 07:23 - Australia

Today, I went to the pool with my new white bathers. I felt really good about myself because everyone was staring at me until this hot guy came up to me and said "Dude, your bathers are see-through. You need to shave!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 782

You deserved it 18 563

By wonder woman - 08/09/2012 04:47 - United States - Levittown

Today, my tire blew while I was on the freeway. I had to change the tire in pouring rain while wearing short shorts and flip-flops. No one stopped to help, but several people politely honked as if to remind me of my misfortune. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 072

You deserved it 3 662

Bladder control

By Anonymous - 27/08/2023 14:00

Today, while driving my son and his friend home, I was so frantic to pee, I was bouncing up and down in my seat. I stopped and ran into a store but it was too late. There was a line and I made it 11 seconds. I was radiating heat from the humiliation of walking past dozens of people after peeing my pants. I even apologized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 657

You deserved it 162

Cheeky

By Anonymous - 29/08/2009 04:10 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower outside at my fiancé's beach house. I was struggling to take my bikini bottoms off, so I started to walk backwards to step out of it. Little did I know that I had pushed the door open. My fiancé, his family, and my family all saw me bend over naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 588

You deserved it 8 631

soul3n 0

Monday 20 April 2009 12:10

how cant you see that?

onigiriqueen 0

Monday 20 April 2009 12:18

Your powers of observation astound me. YDI.

Comments

Funtertaining11 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 5:13

wow. Well, at least they weren't young men. Sorry, that must've been embarrasing and awkward.

willin2takeudown 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 5:38

LOL @ #12

amaneylandx3 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 5:53

LOL @ 15 haha DID YOU SUDDENLY LOSE THE POWER OF VISION!?! AHHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA PRICELESSSSSS! #4

KeithHarris 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 5:56

When I get old I hope I can get a peep show too :-D btw, you wouldn't be blonde by chance would you?

NegativityScene7 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 6:32

Well, THAT was stupid. it's called "look before you un-hook!" Are your roots BLONDE, by chance?

Mallie_Moth 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 7:08

Haven't you ever heard of changing behind a towel?

Jareth_fml 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 9:05

Good one! YDI.

i8anfml 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 9:15

you are an ignoramus.

ubbiejames 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 21:41

wish i was in the car. :D

yeahyeahyeah28 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 2:55

HAHAHA you totally deserved that one who changes in a public parking lot?

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The Top

Today, I was mopping the floor at the hotel I work at. Before I could react, a gentleman stormed through the corridor and slipped and fell on the still wet floor. He complained to the owner, who bitched me out just to satisfy the guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 998

You deserved it 4 002

Today, my work told my they are launching a work performance investigation. That would be OK, if the only person assessing me wasn't the same person giving me the tasks that have nothing to do with my experience, and thus causing the low performance. My kids need my work visa to stay in the country. FML

I agree, your life sucks 976

You deserved it 113

The Top

Today, in bed, my wife took her vibrator and started masturbating. Feeling excited, I went down to help her. She told me to knock it off 'cause she couldn't focus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 964

You deserved it 642

Today, I threw up due to food poisoning. Despite my fever and pain, my wife is completely convinced it was from secretly drinking, and I am now "PERMANENTLY FORBIDDEN" from drinking anything alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 120

Today, I've been told that the test I have tomorrow, which I've been studying for, is not on 'Parent and Child Relationships' but on 'Scotland's Fishing Communities'. My brother thought it would be funny to hide the real booklet, and make up his own one for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 637

You deserved it 294

Today, my foreman complained that I was slowing down productivity and costing the company money, all because I was wearing a harness to protect me from falling over the edge of a three story building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 622

You deserved it 98

Today, I've managed to lock myself in my own bedroom. It won't open no matter what I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 542

You deserved it 385

Today, I discovered my deadbeat ex-husband will not have to pay child support anymore, because while he sat on CERB the entire pandemic, I was an essential worker, and will be punished for having had an actual income. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 138

You deserved it 172