Intimacy: Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his...

By NiHao - 28/09/2009 03:16 - Canada

Today, I was at my friend's dorm eating supper. He and all his roommates are Chinese, and since I'm majoring in Chinese, I could understand what they were talking about. Too bad none of his friends knew that, and talked about banging me while I was sitting there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 145

You deserved it 3 894

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Same thing different taste

By ChickenBallsPlease - 28/01/2014 11:16 - United Kingdom - King's Lynn

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 582

You deserved it 16 652

By Anonymous - 19/09/2016 17:29 - Hong Kong - Central District

Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 848

You deserved it 868

By Sittinginthecorner - 20/01/2016 05:42 - United States - Saint Charles

Today, I got a new roommate. He's from Mongolia. He has had 5 friends over for the last 7 hours, all speaking Mongolian. This is the most awkward party I have ever been to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 627

You deserved it 1 896

Nice to put a face to the screaming!

By dormlyfe - 24/09/2015 02:23 - United States - Moraga

Today, I met new people at my dorm, only to find they already knew me because they listen to my boyfriend and me have sex all the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 037

You deserved it 22 900

By no more mr nice guy - 27/12/2016 07:32

Today, my friend invited me, his girlfriend, and the girl I like over to his house to hang out. We hoped it would get me closer to my crush. The day ended with them having a threesome and me locked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 099

You deserved it 970

By bluediva24 - 26/01/2011 00:54

Today, I spent all day preparing a big, elaborate Italian dinner for my boyfriend, who recently discovered he was part Italian. He came home, turned up his nose and said "I was in the mood for Chinese". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 881

You deserved it 4 151

By Anonymous - 14/11/2011 05:23 - United States

Today, I introduced my Chinese-born girlfriend to the rest of the family. My uncle immediately blurted out, "He's dating a communist." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 685

You deserved it 4 761

Party zone!!

By helloworld92 - 31/01/2009 20:33 - United States

Today, I hung out with my crush for only the second time at his apartment. He was having a party. After a few sips of my green apple smirnoff, I puked up the Chinese food I had eaten earlier all over his new couch in front of him and a bunch of people I didn't know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 273

You deserved it 8 112

By sometingwong - 01/12/2011 20:32 - United States

Today, I had dinner at my girlfriend's house with her parents. Everything was going great, until after dinner when her dad pulled me aside and told me he'd heard us having sex. I was out of town all weekend for a baseball tournament. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 395

You deserved it 3 450

Brain melt

By Anonymous - 03/03/2010 02:37 - United States

Today, I was talking to my best friend about a cute guy that girls are afraid to even speak to, so I then decided to march right up to him and say hello. When he smiled at me, I stood there with my mouth wide open, but I made non-coherent words. He asked me if I was a foreign exchange student. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 115

You deserved it 29 690

xoxcinderellaxox 0

Monday 28 September 2009 11:00

i would have surprised them by speaking to them in chinese and tell them an awesome comeback to shut them up then walked right out.

cocky 0

Monday 28 September 2009 9:54

You should've responded in Chinese by saying, "Too bad I wouldn't feel your tiny Asian dicks!" Buhahahaha.

Comments

jmoose311 3

Monday 5 October 2009 19:49

So did you bang them or what?

fancypants482 0

Friday 9 October 2009 3:42

You obviously are lying because guess what? THERE ISNT A LANGUAGE CALLED CHINESE! The language spoken in China (excluding, like, hong kong, I believe) is manadin! Grow a brain.

jeniilouise 0

Monday 12 October 2009 0:58

even if it's not technically called chinese doesn't mean the OP is lying...the classes to learn that language at my school were called 'chinese' not 'mandarin'.

facts_ofLifE 0

Friday 9 October 2009 8:47

its mandarin... >___

facts_ofLifE 0

Friday 9 October 2009 8:48

*It's mandarin, but its classified as Chinese... #51... and... >__

MadVlrus 1

Monday 12 October 2009 19:51

I wish I ever had that... :/

Clitastrophe 0

Monday 19 October 2009 10:32

Well major their Chinese asses into the bed room and get the inevitable over and done with. What? You just can't stop Chinese dick.

minimedanielle 0

Wednesday 28 October 2009 22:26

i agree with number 2 i would feel great. so get on with ur life and stop compaining about nothing

technolove 7

Wednesday 4 November 2009 20:39

what the hell

ShayLaBella 0

Thursday 5 November 2009 1:14

Ha ha you should have just randomly bust in the conversation saying something like "Kepp on dreamin" or if you were totally into their ideas "Should we do this now or later?"

phxgmr90 0

Wednesday 11 November 2009 13:11

there is mandarin and Cantonese among many other dialects. A large amount of people do not realize that there are many different dialects in China so saying Chinese is probably a better choice. I have actually had this happen to me but it was Spanish...somehow people think I'm Asian even though I am actually Mexican. I don't get it at all.