Intimacy: Today, I was at the grocery store and this hot guy was staring...

By hard - 09/08/2010 07:07 - Canada

Today, I was at the grocery store and this hot guy was staring at my ass, so I smiled at him. My mother noticed he was checking my ass out, and she approached him and said "I know she has a big ass, but it's rude to stare, son." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 707

You deserved it 5 825

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Same thing different taste

By amore89 - 28/07/2019 12:00

Today, I was with my dad at the supermarket and this guy was checking me out. My dad yells at him with a grin, "I know! I make beautiful babies!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 883

You deserved it 243

By Anonymous - 16/08/2012 21:09 - United States

Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 667

You deserved it 47 766

By oshitdonotwant - 08/08/2009 13:42 - United States

Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 508

You deserved it 4 074

Confused

By Anonymous - 13/06/2014 23:36 - United States - Rahway

Today, I was out shopping with my mom. While we were walking, a guy in a car honked at me. I'm not used to compliments, so I was pretty flattered and flashed him a smile. He looked back at me, confused, then shook his head and pointed at my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 564

You deserved it 6 014

By Anonymous - 31/12/2011 06:21 - United States

Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 864

You deserved it 7 313

By embarrassment - 12/06/2009 13:46 - Canada

Today, I went to a family dinner. While waiting to be seated, a guy walked by and I looked to see if he was hot. Then my grandma yelled, "Get your eyeballs back in your head and quit staring at boys!" The whole restaurant heard her. Including the guy. And yes, he was hot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 400

You deserved it 8 386

By thathurt - 01/01/2012 00:51 - United States

Today, while shopping at Wal-Mart, a guy grabbed my butt. When I turned around to slap him, he shook his head, said "Nice ass but such an ugly face", then walked away. I've never been told I'm ugly before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 058

You deserved it 8 396

Miscommunication

By embarrassed - 21/07/2021 01:59 - United States

Today, I saw a really cute guy in the grocery store. We made eye contact a few times and I was trying to work up the nerve to start a conversation. Instead, he screamed, "Yes, I know I’m fat, bitch. You don’t have to stare!” I got so many dirty looks I left immediately. I didn’t think he was fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 474

You deserved it 134

Toxic much?

By tlm84 - 28/07/2014 02:54 - United States - Fitchburg

Today, while out shopping, I could hear what sounded like two grown men talking about me, and they were being pretty gross. I turned around to scold them and it turned out being a dad and his 13-year-old son. He said he was, "teaching a son to be a man", and that my ass was "grounds for discussion." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 650

You deserved it 5 064

By motherdearest - 21/03/2009 23:18 - United States

Today, I went to the mall with my mom. We were in American Eagle shopping for spring clothes, when a few good looking guys walked by and whistled at me. I smiled at them. They were checking out my mom, not me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 286

You deserved it 6 988

Timmo_fml 2

Monday 9 August 2010 16:16

#I like big butts and I cannot lie...#

The_Fonz_fml 0

Monday 9 August 2010 16:15

lol that's funny OP over protective mombot

Comments

SluggerJ 7

Tuesday 10 August 2010 7:55

if it makes you feel better "I like big butts I can not lie & my anaconda don't want none unless you got buns Hun"

Trollz4daLULZ 1

Tuesday 10 August 2010 13:28

are you talking to Atilla?!

Baxton_fml 2

Tuesday 10 August 2010 8:11

no she really does look gross

mpclaw 3

Tuesday 10 August 2010 9:03

your dress size please?

laughingclown7 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 10:18

your moms a giant **** block.

xaarox16 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 10:34

haha fyl that sucks about getting twat blocked :p

xaarox16 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 10:49

haha suuuucks fyl for having a overprotective mom :p

xaarox16 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 10:55

ugh stupid fone wouldnt let me see if i posted so double post >

Trollz4daLULZ 1

Tuesday 10 August 2010 13:31

YDI for using a phone. YDI for spelling it "fone". YDI for blaming it for your suckage at using the interweb.

xaarox16 0

Wednesday 11 August 2010 10:31

sorry im too lazy to bother with a grammar nazi ^^ YDI for being a douche :3?

thebeast2423 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 11:07

@79. u r so hott

ajscw 0

Tuesday 10 August 2010 21:00

pics or it didnt happen

KamilleBlack 3

Wednesday 11 August 2010 4:18

Watever honey, u don't want him. If a guy is checking out my ass, the last thing I am is impressed. I guess Ijust have more self respect than u do...

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The Top

Today, I had a customer tell me how much she regretted not aborting her expected child, how much she hates the father, and described to me in immense detail what it is like to pee while pregnant. All within the 30 seconds it took me to serve her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 982

You deserved it 3 307

Today, I reached out to my mom to confide in her about possibly leaving my cheating husband. She said, "I think you need to stay married and do what you want on the side. That's what I did. I don't even know if your dad is your dad." Apparently she was cheating on my dad when she got pregnant with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 565

You deserved it 85

The Top

Today, my brother met my girlfriend for the first time. Instead of making a good first impression, the first thing he did was talk about how he just took a massive dump and didn't wipe very well, and that's why his hand smelled bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 294

You deserved it 249

Today, for the first day in our bakery, our intern brought croissants and rolls from our biggest competitor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 737

You deserved it 68

Today, a guy told me I was hot and that I should give him a chance. When I told him I was straight, he instantly called me a bigot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 571

You deserved it 396

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 038

You deserved it 3 794

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning how to spend the day together. When I suggested we start off with some fun in bed, then get some pizza and play his favorite video game, he sighed, "Can't we just go straight to gaming?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 036

You deserved it 8 453

Today, I took my four year old son to the playground. When it was time to go, he squirmed out of my arms back to the jungle gym. Not being the type of mother to put up with bad behavior, I swatted his rear and told him we had to go. That's when I realized I'd just spanked the wrong child who was wearing the same coat as my son. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 140

You deserved it 50 407

Same thing different taste

Confused

Miscommunication

Toxic much?

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