Intimacy: Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little...

By Embarressed... - 04/08/2010 10:25 - United Kingdom

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 593

You deserved it 11 340

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 25/03/2012 12:09 - Australia - Croydon

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 507

You deserved it 15 067

Early learner

By Michele - 18/01/2010 00:32 - United States

Today, while babysitting a six year-old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his undies and pointed at his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 607

You deserved it 4 057

You what now?

By tryena - 28/02/2009 10:59 - United States

Today, I babysat a five year-old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 307

You deserved it 92 951

By oboy - 01/03/2010 05:13 - United States

Today, after ten minutes of squishing my boobs together for my boyfriend, trying to get him to stare, he glanced at them then blankly said "I've seen better tits on my mom, so baby just stop that" and smiled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 307

You deserved it 7 400

By Anonymous - 20/10/2012 08:42 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 982

You deserved it 3 354

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 13:33 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 532

You deserved it 7 926

But he's only 5

By Anonymous - 18/12/2019 05:00

Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 761

You deserved it 727

By littl3storm - 13/10/2018 12:00

Today, I was trying on bras in a shop when a little kid stuck their head under my stall. I was completely topless and completely surprised when they asked if I was their mommy. I'm 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 289

You deserved it 179

By Anonymous - 17/09/2014 21:57 - United States - Dewitt

Today, my 4 year old son groped my breasts and said, "This is what daddy told me to do." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 561

You deserved it 4 700

Not now, Sweetie

By Redbeard - 24/01/2020 05:00

Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 189

You deserved it 369

preetyprincess 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:27

awkward...

bt2breakskn 0

Wednesday 4 August 2010 16:30

his dad taught him well lol jk

Comments

forever2life 0

Friday 4 November 2011 1:56

LOOOOOOL!

happyabby123 0

Tuesday 22 November 2011 5:17

STEWY!!!

piwikiwi93 0

Thursday 24 November 2011 6:27

LIKE A PRO!

Philerup31 12

Thursday 8 December 2011 22:22

Lol. Them kids say the darnedest things

ranamile 0

Thursday 5 January 2012 12:57

Did you show him?

soccerdilan 0

Monday 16 January 2012 4:44

WIN!

Irakli_1 27

Tuesday 17 January 2012 17:25

....

XxTooCoolxX 0

Monday 6 February 2012 1:22

He may be little. But is his name Johnny?

kiki122012 5

Monday 12 March 2012 4:33

Sorry OP, but that's hilarious.

drayloon 50

Tuesday 17 April 2012 7:49

smart kid....aha

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I pulled my Christmas tree out of my mother-in-law's garage, only to find out rats had ruined all the lights. The tree cost $2600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 184

You deserved it 490

Today, I was bored, so I started to declutter my closet. I found a pair of jeans I hadn't worn in years and thought they'd fit. As I struggled to pull them on, the seam ripped really loud, and my cat shot out from under the bed like a spooked rocket. Apparently even my jeans feel the need to yell at me for getting too big. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 300

The Top

Today, I realized how in love I am with my soulmate. How how do I tell my wife? FML

I agree, your life sucks 248

You deserved it 1 362

Today, I found out why my wife has been upset with me for the last week. She told me this morning that I did something to upset her on our date night last Friday, she won't tell me what, and she said she'll leave me if I do it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 455

You deserved it 1 102

Today, I ordered ramen to go. I looked at my order and discovered a cockroach. Disgusted, I showed it to them, and they apologized by "replacing" it for free. Later on, while I was enjoying the delicious food, I once again discovered a cockroach buried under all the noodles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 718

You deserved it 6 836

Today, I was getting changed in front of my roommate of two years. Feeling comfortable, I took off all my clothes and started putting new clothes on. I asked why she wasn't taking her eyes off my naked body. She said, "I'm loving the view. Didn't you know I'm a lesbian?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 011

You deserved it 58 994

Today, my new neighbour is totally a Karen, she has the sunglasses, the haircut and the outfits we all know so well, plus I can hear how she speaks to her husband and kids through the wall. I’m afraid to leave my house in case she introduces herself and immediately finds something to moan about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 691

You deserved it 717

Today, I was getting lunch at a fast food restaurant. My boss was in front of me, and in order to get on his good side I offered to pay. Instead, I got fired because I guess my boss assumed I was making fun of his salary, which I knew nothing about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 541

You deserved it 3 184