Health: Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the...

By Monty - 01/03/2009 08:45 - United States

Today, I was baking cookies. When I took the tray out of the oven I closed the door, but it bounced back open and hit me in the back of the knees. That caused me to sit down on the hot oven door. I was just wearing my short bathrobe and no underwear. I really burned my ass and um...stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 520

You deserved it 15 619

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 03/04/2011 15:14 - United States

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 742

You deserved it 6 424

Kitchen nightmare

By cookiemonster - 13/08/2013 16:10 - South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, after placing it on top of the stove, my hot tray of freshly-baked cookies slipped. I caught it, though. With my bare hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 451

You deserved it 6 689

By anonymous - 12/03/2012 08:03 - United States

Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 676

You deserved it 27 504

My home hates me

By Anonymous - 24/07/2015 02:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, over the course of three hours, I was burned by our toaster oven, hit in the head by a fridge door, hit my toes on a chair, clipped my hip on a table edge, and had both the washer and dryer lids slam on the same hand. I'm not sure what hurts more, my body or the shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 251

You deserved it 4 329

Slippery when wet

By anonymous - 03/01/2017 01:03 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I managed to spill piping hot oil all over my kitchen floor, thinking it was too hot to clean right then and there I left it for a few hours to cool. I forgot about it, and slipped over in it bashing my head into my cupboard handle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 728

You deserved it 1 855

By Anonymous - 29/01/2012 05:50 - United States

Today, I was cleaning my room and set my burnt out light bulb on my computer chair without any second thought. Later, I sat on the chair, the light bulb shattered and I got a huge gash on my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 676

You deserved it 30 907

By .. - 13/09/2011 14:48 - United States

Today, I was in a hurry to get something out of the oven, so I quickly grabbed my roommate's only oven mitt and grabbed the pan in the oven. It didn't take long to figure out there was a hole in it when my thumb hit the hot pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 244

You deserved it 4 121

Hazardous

By Anonymous - 28/09/2016 13:08 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my kitchen is trying to kill me. So far, I've hit my head three times on cupboards that opened themselves, cut open my hand on the microwave door when it slammed shut, and burned my cheek with the "heat-proof" oven mitt when I pushed the hair off my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 270

You deserved it 2 505

By Sam_Licker81 - 19/11/2009 16:41 - United States

Today, I was baking cookies and opened the oven door to check on them. Apparently, wearing a gold necklace means the wave of heat will burn your very fair skin. I now have a bright red ring of stars around my neck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 800

You deserved it 6 693

Third degree

By Anonymous - 10/07/2021 06:01

Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 476

You deserved it 142

areyoukiddingme7 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 17:47

that really suckss. but did you drop the cookies? lol

DDDDana 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 18:44

Daaaang. Cookies shouldn't ever be the cause of pain.

Comments

juicym 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 19:21

I bet next time you will be more careful lol

Bibico_fml 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 19:25

You must be very agile to be able to shut the oven door, spin around so it hits the back of your knees, then sit down on the door gently enough not to bust it off its hinges. This all sounds very true.

Karen_fml 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 19:27

Wow hope you get better soon. I guess you won't be able to sit for awhile.

youareindeepshit 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 19:30

A man baking cookies? my my.

nebulize 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 20:01

I can see this happening, the oven at my grandma's house is really old and has a habit of bouncing back, I have a scar on my arm to prove it. I feel really bad for you, hopefully the smell of cookies covered up the stench of burned flesh.

Megan_fml 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 20:14

ouch!!!!!

toxic_addiction 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 20:18

"When cookies attack!" That sucks bro, seriously.

FlickMyBean 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 22:02

General Electric - Promoting Abstinence Effectively.

marylovesyou8D 7

Thursday 22 July 2010 10:09

lollllll. :D

disgruntled_stdt 0

Sunday 1 March 2009 22:35

OW. Why does everyone think it's a guy? Never seen a "men's short bathrobe".

AmoraLynn 6

Thursday 30 July 2009 22:02

It actually says the OP is a man next to the name, and the OP used 'stuff' to describe the area burned I don't think a woman would have. Easy thing to look over. The OP's gender is usually along the bottom line of the FML, along with a location sometimes.