By OptimusVader - 13/03/2013 13:36 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was cleaning a house. While dusting a rickety nightstand, a drawer fell open and a light-up dildo fell out and turned on. I couldn't figure out how to turn it off. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 801
You deserved it 4 774

OptimusVader tells us more.

OptimusVader 23

Well I did mention it was rickety. It rocked while I dusted and it was just poorly made, overall. It tilted forward, the drawer slid out and I couldn't catch it in time. Then BAM! Sudden singing light show from an old woman's rabbit.

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Top comments

perdix 29

Instead of you trying to turn it off, why don't you let it try to turn you on?

442 15
narlynick 13

Quick! Hide it before they know you tampered with it! Butt, where?

113 2

Comments

123man 11

I believe that particular brand turns off upon user's climax. Better hurry!

3 5
kishorekumar_a 10

Find the ugliest dress, wrap it aroud the ***** and put it back in the drawer. Though I must question your cleaning techniques, if a drawer suddenly flew open.

0 17
BellaBelle_fml 23

What do you think a ***** is? A fairy princess' magical light-up wand?

18 0
notsofriendly 17

I guess a lot of you guys haven't seen old furniture where the drawers have a panel that opens downwards and outwards, making it very easy for it to "fall open"... especially with the weight of a battery-laden penis-sized object rolling up against it...

16 0
OptimusVader 23

Thank you for actually understanding the concept of old furniture lol!

2 0
ocramavaf 15

might as well have used it till the batteries run out

2 0
hellonyancat 6

What...why does it light up? Does one partner turn off the lights, turn on the ***** and do some sort of light show. I must be naive because I can't figure out a good use for it lighting up at all.

10 1
BrandiLush 31

One word: Ecstasy! It's for when you want to rave and play.

3 0
Catkam623 27

If you stuff it in your mouth does the light shine out of your ass?

45 1
RtardSupport 2

Someone needs some practice.. I believe there are some awesome tutorials on the Web that deal with this kind of stuff. That is what Pornhub is for right?

0 4
skyeyez9 24

Let us know how it turns out and report back to your "FML" family with your conclusion.

35 2