Miscellaneous: Today, I was eating out at a restaurant downtown with my brother...

By Random Person - 21/11/2010 05:31 - United States

Today, I was eating out at a restaurant downtown with my brother in-law when I told him I couldn't eat any more. He then told me, "You better, or you're walking home." He wasn't kidding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 439

You deserved it 3 593

The rhythm of the fight
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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/08/2010 02:21 - United States

Today, while at work at a new job, my brother comes and takes my car. Along with all my money, my phone, and whatever else I had in my purse. His message to me through one of my co-workers was "walk home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 463

You deserved it 3 518

By that's methed up, darling - 16/08/2013 21:33 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dragged me to the local McDonald's, refusing to drive me home until he ate. When I mentioned how dangerous that part of town is, he stopped and went all Walter White on me in front of everyone, spouting lines like "I AM the danger" and "I'M the one who knocks, babe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 883

You deserved it 6 088

Great party

By Anonymous - 24/07/2024 19:00

Today, what should have been a nice family dinner ended with my wife standing over me, staring me dead in the eyes, while endlessly repeating, “Get him out of my house, get him out of my house…” until I agreed to take my drunk brother to a hotel to sleep it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 120

You deserved it 756

By Anonymous - 21/08/2009 04:01 - United States

Today, in Burger King, I was leaning against the railing looking at the menu. I saw an old man using the rail to walk, so I got out of the way. He ran his hand across my back and said "You're so cute, I'd like to take you home and lock you in my basement naked so you can't leave" and walked out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 807

You deserved it 3 908

By Josh - 06/03/2015 00:25 - United States - Fenton

Today, some guy on the street threatened to stab me. I called his bluff, and walked away. He wasn't bluffing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 934

You deserved it 7 853

Brotherly love

By Foodcomesfirst - 24/11/2009 20:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I felt dizzy and light-headed. So I sat down at the top of my stairs calling my brother who was downstairs, for help because I was scared something was wrong with me. He called back "No, I'm eating." I fainted. When I woke up, I was still alone upstairs and he was still eating downstairs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 139

You deserved it 3 696

By fatgirl - 16/05/2010 04:08 - United States

Today, I was eating pizza with my boyfriend and my friends. I was laughing and talking and went for another piece when my boyfriend grabbed my wrist and said that I had had enough. My friends all backed him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 017

You deserved it 10 735

Agoraphobic

By jaya - 03/05/2022 12:00

Today, I attempted to conquer my fear of eating out. The very first thing I saw as soon as I got to the restaurant? An unconscious guy getting taken away by paramedics. I turned around and went straight home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 914

You deserved it 191

By RequilaRainbow - 26/01/2012 07:34 - Canada

Today, while waiting outside a liquor store for my boyfriend, a drunk guy leaned over my shoulder, took a large bite out of my burger, and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 694

You deserved it 4 340

The proposal

By Brasilian29 - 11/12/2014 12:01 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of two years after eating in a 5-star restaurant. She said that she wasn't ready, and that she would walk home by herself, which she did. A homeless gentleman walked up from behind me, patted me on the back, and said, "Bitches, man." I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 791

You deserved it 3 388

redbluegreen 40

Sunday 21 November 2010 12:19

If you're one of those people that orders a ton of food and then only eats a tiny bit, you totally deserve it. Especially if he's the one paying for the meal.

allmidnighteyes 10

Sunday 21 November 2010 12:09

Was it at KFC? I want a failure pile in a sadness bowl!

Comments

robc32ca 4

Sunday 21 November 2010 12:44

eat, purge, repeat...

allmidnighteyes 10

Sunday 21 November 2010 12:47

if you make a fist with your left hand, but with the fingers laying over the thumb, you can stick a finger on your right hand in your throat without activating the gag reflex.