Miscellaneous: Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles...

By lizzard0416 - 30/11/2012 03:00 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was going to give my baby daughter an empty Pringles tin to play with on the floor. I saw some crumbs at the bottom, so I emptied the can in my mouth before I gave it to her. I crunched hard and spat them out, realizing my boyfriend had just cut his toenails into the can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 975

You deserved it 9 991

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Same thing different taste

Spice

By Anonymous - 07/04/2021 04:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 977

By fububc - 05/02/2010 15:14 - France

Today, I went out for a smoke before dinner. I glanced through the window only to see my husband take my cooking scissors, cut his toe nails and then put them back in the utensils canister without washing them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 836

You deserved it 6 423

5-star meal

By storyofmylife - 15/03/2009 02:27 - United States

Today, while I was babysitting, the toddler was feeding me banana slices from her tray while I was cutting up clay for her to mold. It was all fine until she shoved something hard and crunchy into my mouth. I immediately spat it out into my hand. It was a dead cricket she found on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 644

You deserved it 10 789

Tasty snack

By Thatkid - 18/02/2009 14:29 - Singapore

Today, my friend had a Coke can on his desk in class. It was empty but I was thirsty so I picked it up thinking I could try to get that little bit of Coke always left at the bottom. When I took a sip I found out he had been picking his fingernails and putting them in the can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 703

You deserved it 56 621

By ohhhgross - 26/10/2009 18:32 - Singapore

Today, while I was eating, my younger sister came over and sat beside me. She started clipping her toenails. Disgusted by it, I turned and opened my mouth to tell her to move somewhere else, just as one flew inside my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 270

You deserved it 5 341

By Avomitmous - 09/02/2014 21:18 - United Kingdom - Bournemouth

Today, less than a week after moving in together, I decided to clean out my husband's messy room. In the process, I found a jar containing what appears to be a toenail collection. I don't think I'll ever regain my appetite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 729

You deserved it 5 326

What am I doing?

By janesays - 24/02/2010 07:45 - United States

Today, my 2 year-old had a large booger blocking his nose so I pulled it out. I was on the phone and absentmindedly rolling it around between my thumb and pointer finger. I put it in my mouth and crushed it between my teeth for a solid minute before I remembered what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 592

You deserved it 66 557

By argfarblewarblearble - 07/08/2015 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 896

You deserved it 2 331

Masterchef 2020

By Anonymous - 26/11/2020 18:58 - United States - Maryville

Today, I was eating some cake that my roommate's girlfriend brought by for us. I felt something weird in my mouth, so I stopped chewing to grab it. It was a fingernail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 980

You deserved it 66

Unfortunate

By Anonymous - 16/01/2021 08:01

Today, I was eating a bag of chips when one of the pieces broke off into a sharp point and when I chewed it, it stabbed into my gums. When I got up to wash the blood out of my mouth, I hit my big toe on my desk corner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 922

You deserved it 158

crazy4books23 13

Friday 30 November 2012 8:32

Weird, I accidentally had toenails in my mouth once too. I feel your pain OP.

ninjuh_wingman 29

Friday 30 November 2012 8:35

A Pringles tin is like the best toy ever besides the ever popular cardboard box.

Comments

DocBastard 38

Friday 30 November 2012 8:37

You should have bought her an iPad instead so random strangers could scold you for spoiling her.

sugarshane007 20

Friday 30 November 2012 8:41

But Doc, don't you know that strangers parent best!

GhettoXmuffin 7

Friday 30 November 2012 8:42

That would probably be the better option anyways.

PreviousFMLer 2

Friday 30 November 2012 10:34

This is a reference to a previous FML.

peopleplease 4

Friday 30 November 2012 8:42

Some people need to learn sarcasm. Especially on this site. For real.

Mjfalcon 8

Friday 30 November 2012 8:42

The crumbs are always the best. Get all that extra flavoring that fell down. You were greatly deceived. I bet that was one hell of a surprise!

kniggit 10

Friday 30 November 2012 8:44

Your baby daughter is a bastard child, she was planning that all along!

sarah6786 14

Friday 30 November 2012 9:13

WHAT.

kniggit 10

Friday 30 November 2012 9:22

Since he's a boyfriend and not a husband, I'd say she's probably a bastard child.

MrsPegg 45

Friday 30 November 2012 9:48

27 just has a bad case of Foot in Mouth. Should heel up quickly though...

sugarshane007 20

Friday 30 November 2012 8:45

An yes, I thought I had heard of the new Pringles flavor of toe cheese. I hear they are going to follow up with more fungal types, perhaps OP can test those for us as well.