Animals: Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the...

By smellsofeggs - 26/11/2009 21:13 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having a playful fight with my brother. I made the point that our dog likes me better than him. To this, my dog jumped onto the sofa, turned to me and vomited on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 066

You deserved it 8 506

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Same thing different taste

By Annie - 22/11/2009 22:07 - Mexico

Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 669

You deserved it 6 031

By anonamous - 12/03/2012 21:45 - United States

Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 165

You deserved it 9 126

By killjoyx - 23/07/2015 18:28 - United States - Suffolk

Today, when I woke up, my dog excitedly came up to me and licked my face. A few minutes later, I find out he had thrown up twice before he licked my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 805

You deserved it 3 190

By Anonymous - 15/12/2013 06:47 - United States - Fresno

Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 366

You deserved it 35 763

By furryfriend - 16/09/2014 18:46 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I was home sick and playing with my dog. I suddenly felt the urge to throw up, so I sprinted to the bathroom. My dog thought this was an invitation to chase me and tackle me to the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 099

You deserved it 3 974

By Anonymous - 31/07/2015 18:55 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was changing my clothes with my dog in the room. As I took off my shirt, he looked at me, ran into the corner, and threw up. Well that's a confidence booster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 688

You deserved it 2 813

By Brinty - 16/09/2009 02:43 - Australia

Today, I was napping with my boyfriend and his dog. The dog was making odd coughing noises, but my boyfriend refused to kick him out of the bed. A few moments later, I rolled onto my stomach, into a pile of dog vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 682

You deserved it 4 563

By dogggg - 14/07/2014 02:10 - India - Pune

Today, I caught my dog drinking from the toilet. After yelling at him, his apology was licking my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 740

You deserved it 9 633

By Anonymous - 20/12/2012 19:50 - Spain - Santa Cruz De Tenerife

Today, I was woken up by my dog scratching at my door. After a while of this, I finally got up to let her in. When I opened the door, she looked at me, threw up, and scurried away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 996

You deserved it 9 670

By ginya - 07/06/2016 01:58 - United States - Bedford

Today, my sister asked me to let her dog out of the kennel when I got home. I did only to have the little beast bite me. She then ate the entire content of the cat's litter box, which she couldn't keep down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 483

You deserved it 1 083

shananigans 0

Friday 27 November 2009 1:45

Please please give us the link to that video!!

breenarae25 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 4:01

who said he was recording?

Comments

Kaeli_lvee 0

Friday 27 November 2009 2:03

yeaaaa..link?

xoxcinderellaxox 0

Friday 27 November 2009 2:10

fake.

imperfectclarity 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:00

It was love vomit. He was just demonstrating how much he loves you.

bmonehh 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:03

The fml changed.....?

Username72999 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:07

Yeah, I don't get it either. Someone explain.

jeanii_fml 4

Friday 27 November 2009 3:12

Whoa, that is weird.

alex_vik 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:51

Yeah, I was like "Didn't this have another couple sentences about YouTube and her dad recording this in it before?".

fmylifeer 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:50

http://ihatejade.com/?id=822xfiyicino9jm86fbmvc5sd30wxu

whoismgmt 0

Friday 27 November 2009 4:24

yeah this did change... have you ever tried to search for the author by the way? Ive never found one...

1234five 0

Friday 27 November 2009 4:57

Why are like 90% of these fml stories about vomit!?

meanie_monday 0

Friday 27 November 2009 5:27

I love how they changed the fml. They just want people to shut up and stop criticizing the mods. *chuckles*

loninessYman 0

Friday 27 November 2009 5:41

F your life

gpstyne 0

Friday 27 November 2009 6:19

stfu YDI for being a douche this isn't an FML FAIL

Keywords

DIY Cats Family Miscellaneous Poopoo peepee Work Management Awkward Relatable Coworkers Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Love Dating Mental health Anxiety Technology Health Sleep Roommate Clumsy Noise Confused AITA Parents

The Top

Today, I was at the gym on the elliptical. Feeling proud of myself for finishing a very intense workout, I looked to my left to see that the maintenance guy fixing the machine next to me had burned more calories testing the machine than I did during my entire workout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 577

You deserved it 5 576

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him "Meow" over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin, and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 634

You deserved it 68 712

The Top

Today, I can’t even find a place to rent. Every place has dozens of applications, with several offering well over asking price. I just graduated from college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 112

Today, my girlfriend took me to see my favorite band live. Afterwards, we were lucky enough to run into the lead guitarist, who promptly asked her if she'd like to go back to his hotel room. She accepted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 079

You deserved it 226

Today, I visited my new doctor, hoping that he would be able to figure out the cause of the pains I've been having for years. He told me there's nothing he can do, that half the drugs out there cause cancer anyway and that I should look into homeopathy. Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 629

You deserved it 2 400

Today, I was told that I will never be able to have children. Thankfully for my husband, his girlfriend sure can. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 443

You deserved it 3 659

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex; I know that some women are great multitaskers, but I'm guessing it was a bad sign when she started to go over the shopping list. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 210

You deserved it 14 625

Today, some pig slapped my ass as he passed me in the street, then looked back at me with a dirty grin. His grin turned to horror when he realized that I'm actually a guy, then to anger as he bitched me out for "tricking" him by "looking like a chick". FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 345

You deserved it 7 344

Same thing different taste

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