Miscellaneous: Today, I had six friends round for pizza. When I went to answer...

By has-evil-friends - 26/11/2009 20:30 - United Kingdom

Today, I had six friends round for pizza. When I went to answer the door to the delivery, my friends turned off the lights and pretended they weren't there when I shouted for help carrying all the food. Not only does the cute delivery guy think I'm greedy, but also that I have imaginary friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 713

You deserved it 3 624

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Thanks!

By Yuri - 29/09/2024 09:00 - United States - Gloucester

Today, I opened the door to a pizza delivery guy. I hadn't order any, but I thought maybe my roommate had. As he handed me the box, I said, "Thanks, you too" when he told me to enjoy my meal. He stopped, looked confused, and said, "Wait, what?" before leaving. I then realized my roommate was out of town and I’d just taken someone else’s pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115

You deserved it 352

Classic

By Anonymous - 11/03/2021 16:30 - United States - Enterprise

Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 671

You deserved it 558

Keeping up appearances

By waterpistolriot - 23/10/2020 11:02 - Austria

Today, I ordered food for delivery. I actually made it sound as if there were other people at home so I had an excuse for ordering so much. I don't think they bought it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 464

You deserved it 855

By blahpizzablah - 22/06/2009 00:37 - United States

Today, I was delivering pizzas for my summer job. I got a big order to deliver for a fellow graduate's party. While I was being paid for the order my friend shows up and says "Don't pay him, his parents are rich, he can handle it." Then they shut the door and took off. The bill was $75. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 614

You deserved it 3 817

Busted

By Anonymous - 11/04/2021 08:00

Today, I felt like cheating on my diet and ordered a pizza. My mom and my sister were napping, so I put in the delivery notes, “Please don’t knock.” The delivery guy knocked anyway. LOUD. My mom and sister got up and saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 1 274

By Anonymous - 13/11/2010 22:34 - United States

Today, I ordered a pizza online to be delivered to my apartment. After an hour of waiting, I called the pizza place to ask what the problem was. Apparently, the people at the apartment below me took my already paid for pizza and ate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 262

You deserved it 3 090

Unloveable

By Blah - 10/10/2019 06:01

Today, it was my second day of house-sitting. I was so out of my mind from not seeing people that I invited a bunch of friends over for dinner. I said I would pay for pizza and we could all hang out in the house. Even with an unsupervised house and free food, no one showed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 957

You deserved it 398

By anon - 10/11/2012 21:14 - United States - Kent

Today, I delivered a pizza to a guy so high out of his mind that I had to let myself in and set it down on a table, because he'd forgotten how to walk, and was on the ground sobbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 092

You deserved it 2 241

By Anonymous - 08/10/2012 22:27 - Canada - Truro

Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 723

You deserved it 40 596

By Suprise - 17/08/2013 04:38 - United States

Today, as I returned home, I noticed some movement inside my house. Thinking it was a break-in, I called 911. It was my friends and some coworkers trying to throw me a surprise birthday party. Nobody's said a word to me since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 093

You deserved it 8 941

TheLoneWolf87 4

Friday 27 November 2009 2:31

Fosters Home for Imaginary Duechebags! It'll be a smashing success!

drunkenpoop 0

Friday 27 November 2009 2:49

why would you care what the pizza guy thinks about you? odds are, you'll never see him again. i dont see an FML here ..

Comments

k43L1 0

Friday 27 November 2009 1:55

haha i doubt he thought that. no worries.

dudeitsdanny 9

Friday 27 November 2009 1:57

You do have imaginary friends. I just doubt he figured it out.

Anteezy 7

Friday 27 November 2009 2:10

why does he think youre greedy

TheLoneWolf87 4

Friday 27 November 2009 2:31

Fosters Home for Imaginary Duechebags! It'll be a smashing success!

drunkenpoop 0

Friday 27 November 2009 2:49

why would you care what the pizza guy thinks about you? odds are, you'll never see him again. i dont see an FML here ..

FMLjudge007 0

Friday 27 November 2009 2:52

do you have ESP??

yummehMOO 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:39

oh boo-hoo

trestie 0

Friday 27 November 2009 3:54

funny !

lo1337a 1

Friday 27 November 2009 4:16

I doubt he thinks that. You seem overly paranoid.

soadgorillaz 0

Friday 27 November 2009 4:35

oh yeah FYL because a guy you'll never see again thinks your weird.....

Keywords

Awkward Embarrassing Miscellaneous Sleep Work Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Dogs Animals Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 776

You deserved it 3 939

Today, while driving home, I looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that my three-year-old daughter had managed to get out of her seat and had crawled to the back window. I pulled over and strapped her in again. Five minutes later she was back at the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 219

You deserved it 5 961

The Top

Today, the girl who lived downstairs and who was also sleeping with my guy moved out. She left a stack of my mail she had been taking at my door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 019

You deserved it 97

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 788

You deserved it 11 865

Today, I was trying on some new pants in the fitting room at a store. I was so overcome with joy when I noticed that I had dropped two pant sizes, that when I took them off and went outside to pay for them, I realized I forgot to put back on my original jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 318

You deserved it 13 692

Today, my dad and his girlfriend left for a 10-day vacation. They booked an expensive beach-house. I'm an A grade student and just last month, he stopped paying my school fees because he 'couldn't afford it.' Oh, and he's making me feed the dog while he's away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 170

You deserved it 3 870

Today, a girl came up to me on a club dance floor and said, “Shut up and dance with me,” like the song lyrics, only I fell over on her while dancing, and she dislocated her ankle. I don’t think this woman is gonna be my destiny after that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 770

You deserved it 343

Today, I went to pick a penny off of the ground for good luck. Someone kneed me in the butt, I fell face first and broke my glasses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 790

You deserved it 4 274