Sex and Intimacy: Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great...

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 313

You deserved it 2 764

Back to school
Is that it, have we really enjoyed the holidays? It's time to find the best back-to-school struggles. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Repetition

By Fuck - 25/02/2015 21:39 - United States - Fowler

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 776

You deserved it 4 441

Oh yeah?

By alexis89 - 26/05/2009 16:53 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Attempting to make things a little more exciting, I said in my sexiest voice, "Oh yeah, harder." My boyfriend who apparently doesn't like talking dirty, pulled out and angrily said, "I was trying, what more do you want?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 545

You deserved it 20 199

By Anonymous - 27/02/2015 19:37 - United States - Roseville

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 008

You deserved it 4 306

By picturemenakedbaby - 21/07/2009 10:42 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were on the phone. He started talking dirty, and saying how horny he was, etc. So I decided to play along and said "I want you to picture me naked, baby." All of a sudden I heard a huge sigh. He responded, "Ew, that just killed it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 974

You deserved it 12 730

Sexy catboys rule my life

By verno02 - 10/08/2010 23:58 - Canada

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He's the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 120

You deserved it 8 805

Narcissism

By during - 19/05/2010 12:12 - United States

Today, while me and my boyfriend were having sex, he moaned out his own name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 456

You deserved it 7 335

So sensual...

By Wellokthen - 17/02/2017 22:00 - United States

Today, things began to get hot and heavy between my boyfriend and me. Suddenly, in a deep, sexy voice, he whispered, "God help me for what I'm about to do." Thinking it was just an odd manner of dirty talk, I mumbled about liking it. He then farted very loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 076

You deserved it 1 159

By Anonymous - 30/05/2009 14:19 - Australia

Today, I was having amazing sex with this guy I had been seeing for a while. It got really intense, so did my moans. Guys usually like when I moan, but he just put his hands over my mouth and told me to "shut up" because it sounded like "pig noises". FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 325

You deserved it 21 501

Excuuuuuuse me?

By Anonymous - 24/12/2012 13:32 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 488

You deserved it 11 510

Kinky

By 9gingerface66 - 15/01/2012 06:29 - United States

Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 874

You deserved it 4 683

andits 21

Tuesday 19 January 2016 18:24

Once he finished you should've said "I give this establishment two maybe three stars" lol

NostalgiaFreak9 41

Tuesday 19 January 2016 18:24

Believe me, based on what I've read on this app, people have said much worse.

Comments

shinikageWolf 15

Tuesday 19 January 2016 19:40

"Left something to be desired, 2 out of 5 stars, at least they tried."

Dilexar 26

Tuesday 19 January 2016 20:01

You should leave a Yelp! review

MitiMiki 16

Tuesday 19 January 2016 20:06

Communication is the key to good sex. It doesn't just happen. Just don't talk about it in the heat of the moment. Find a time when you have some privacy and just be honest. Be gentle and diplomatic and reassure him that it doesn't mean you don't want to have sex. Tell him what you like and don't like with him and give him a chance to tell you what he likes and doesn't like. Honestly, if you do it right, it can be a lot of fun!

alexthevaultgirl 13

Sunday 24 January 2016 7:00

I beg to differ I've had a one nightstand be the most amazing sex ever

Logical07 16

Monday 25 January 2016 4:07

#55 Ditto.

littlefoott69 14

Tuesday 19 January 2016 20:09

discuss it so you can both be satisfied. .its dirty talk ...people like different things just say ..that didn't work for me ..i would respond better to somthing like .......