Love: Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought... - FML

By Anonymous - 18/09/2011 21:24 - United States

Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 386

You deserved it 4 442

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Same thing different taste

By Dumped - 22/12/2009 07:57 - United States

Today, I was going on a date with my girlfriend. When I took her home, her sister came to the door. I used to date her sister and I didn't know they were related. My girlfriend realized this, then kicked me in the crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 114

You deserved it 11 672

By filipinoclari808 - 16/04/2009 06:47 - United States

Today, I was horsing around after my big test. Someone punched me softly on my back. Figuring it was my friend, I turned around and did a roundhouse kick. It was my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 794

You deserved it 81 433

By Ari - 16/06/2011 04:19 - United States

Today, a man came up to me and punched me in the face. He turned out to be the guy my ex-girlfriend cheated on me with. Apparently, she told him we broke up because I used to beat her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 885

You deserved it 3 718

By Anonymous - 04/03/2010 00:36 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be amusing to sneak into my room and jump me in my bed. Too bad that when she jumped, one of her knees landed on my crotch. I haven't been able to walk properly since this morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 681

You deserved it 3 099

By ouch - 29/03/2011 03:33 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 657

You deserved it 16 855

By Anon - 09/01/2013 19:27 - United States - Southbury

Today, I was laughing at a girl who really sucks at badminton. Turns out she has anger issues, and a really good aim when she's mad. I've never been hit so hard in the crotch before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 526

You deserved it 64 264

By Anonymous - 14/01/2014 16:15 - United Kingdom - Chester

Today, I was laying down with my girlfriend, when she asked me if I'd ever been kicked in the junk. I awkwardly said no, and she replied, "Well maybe that should change." while rubbing my shoulder lovingly. I'm scared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 976

You deserved it 4 978

By thatCanadianGuy7 - 29/06/2009 19:55 - Canada

Today, I got beaten up by my ex-girlfriend's older brother who does mixed martial arts, because my ex saw me making out with another girl. We broke up over 6 months ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 967

You deserved it 5 046

By Annoymous - 03/09/2009 10:19 - Australia

Today, walking home from work, I saw a little boy crying, so I crouched down to his eye level. I asked him what was wrong, his reply was to kick me in the groin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 496

You deserved it 5 810

By Anonymous - 12/08/2012 09:23 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 149

You deserved it 2 367

Next

Top comments

twinny_sc 13

Monday 19 September 2011 1:30

****** kick!

heilheather 7

Monday 19 September 2011 1:34

**** punt!

Comments

Glitterhinoceros 14

Monday 19 September 2011 1:37

O-o-o-ovary kill.

RebekahBrooke 9

Monday 19 September 2011 3:41

lol. first original one I've seen

Doddoss 1

Wednesday 5 October 2011 3:58

Awesome, just awesome.

Brooding99 15

Monday 19 September 2011 1:39

Reason 159 that "pixie cuts" don't work dude.

fuzz97 23

Monday 19 September 2011 1:40

Unless she's really butch.

MangoRico1 1

Monday 19 September 2011 1:40

Is your name Chaz ?

pinecone1414 6

Monday 19 September 2011 1:45

Oooo. Well I think that on this situation you should be grateful you're not a man.

mrahhhhh 21

Monday 19 September 2011 1:45

That's my purse! I don't know you! There's a reference behind that, so don't assume its a non-sequitor and thumb me down for it.

Mitch_Connor 11

Monday 19 September 2011 1:47

"I heard you're good at kickball."

borkchop1992 15

Monday 19 September 2011 2:13

king of the hill

Zillie 4

Monday 19 September 2011 2:15

******* love King of the Hill!

SirBedevere 0

Monday 19 September 2011 1:47

Falcon Punt.

GrammaticalNazi 2

Monday 19 September 2011 1:47

If she didn't realize it wasn't her boyfriend after she touched your crotch, then feel bad for her for only getting guys with atomic penises. You can't blame her for being so angry.

badactor009 0

Monday 19 September 2011 8:29

You can blame some idiot for attacking the wrong person.

Gloritank 8

Monday 19 September 2011 1:48

I was wondering how this could happen. Then I saw it was from Texas :) question answered.

kimaci3 0

Monday 19 September 2011 4:58

^^ lmfao

yummylicious 5

Monday 19 September 2011 1:52

I hate how aggressive people are, especially when it ends up being towards the wrong person.

boredblonde 17

Monday 19 September 2011 1:53

youre probably a cute boy :)

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Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Teenagers Dogs Animals Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

Well. I must admit when I first received today's illustration, seeing the massive pliers pop out kind of freaked me out. Then I reached the last panel and I'm not sure if it's out of anxiety relief or what, but I laughed so hard I might have choked a...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Today, it was dad’s funeral and I intended to speak but I was crying so much I couldn’t finish and mom had to help me back to my seat. Unfortunately, most of our family are arseholes and I could hear someone saying, “Disgraceful, shaming his dad like that.” It was the worst day of my entire life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 635

You deserved it 81

The Top

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 394

You deserved it 5 001

Today, an old flame reached out with some truly filthy intent. After burning with righteous indignation, I ended up sending back some embarrassingly submissive pictures. What is wrong with me? FML

I agree, your life sucks 79

You deserved it 594

Today, my mother-in-law proudly posted a photo of “all three” of her grandsons on Facebook. She has four. Somehow my son was forgotten, even though we live close by and see her regularly. I guess we’re not memorable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 116

Today, my boyfriend invited me over for dinner for the first time. The place was full of his ex's stuff, books on the shelves, makeup in the bathroom, clothes in the closet and even shoes on the floor. Not to mention creepy plush toys staring at me. She left him 8 years ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 336

You deserved it 109

Today, I was walking outside when I saw my best friend about 100 meters away. I began running towards her, arms flailing, screaming out a tribal battle cry. It wasn't until I was nearly on top of her that I realised it was someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 519

You deserved it 37 206

Today, my mom left for a bachelorette party. She forgot a gift, so she called me and made me go into her closet, pick out a sex toy from the "box of gag gifts", and bring it to her. Should I pick anal beads or a cock ring? FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 897

You deserved it 5 039