Intimacy: Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into... - FML

By nemo518 - 23/12/2010 06:36 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 144

You deserved it 9 447

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Wawawiwa - 21/07/2010 23:44 - Namibia

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 828

You deserved it 53 764

By goldie09 - 18/02/2010 17:36 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were fooling around in bed, when suddenly, he turned to me and started playing with my breasts as if they were turn tables and he was the DJ. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 797

You deserved it 5 232

A little higher, dude

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 14:00

Spicy

Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 523

By horny21 - 21/02/2010 08:19 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was laying on the bed, naked, waiting for my boyfriend to come home since we haven't had sex in almost a month. Hearing him come in, I struck my sexiest pose. He walked into our room and tossed his backpack at me. Not only did we not have sex, his backpack gave me a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 517

You deserved it 4 037

By Amberain - 16/08/2012 15:16 - United Kingdom - Widnes

Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 337

You deserved it 7 080

By MulticoloredSlug - 13/10/2016 10:57 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 430

You deserved it 1 416

By again? - 15/03/2016 10:03 - United States - Olympia

Spicy

Today, while making love to my boyfriend, I noticed that instead of looking at me, he was admiring himself in the mirror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 425

You deserved it 2 508

Disinterested

By lily - 13/09/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 379

You deserved it 347

By ambermcnulty - 05/01/2010 02:27 - France

Spicy

Today, it was the first time my boyfriend saw me naked. He grabbed my breasts and began to sing, "I've got a lovely bunch of coconuts." He's 22. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 229

You deserved it 6 082

Manchild

By Anonymous - 02/11/2021 05:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years thought it would be funny to squat above my head completely naked while I was sleeping. When I woke up, his asshole and ball sack was in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 386

You deserved it 296

Next

Top comments

sallen0046 4

Thursday 23 December 2010 12:17

So what? Every intimate encounter of your life will not be romantic. If you can't learn to appreciate the playful times, you're going to have serious difficulty hanging on to a boyfriend.

KingDingALing 9

Thursday 23 December 2010 12:20

You should do the same thing with his balls, OP.

Comments

bbeach2013 0

Wednesday 2 November 2011 3:31

WIN!

jeff1900 0

Wednesday 2 November 2011 7:41

lol that is kinda wired

TeenTitan 0

Saturday 24 December 2011 7:41

I thought it was funny xD

cheer4everever 0

Friday 27 January 2012 5:05

Immaturity is the biggest problem facing adults these days . . .

Rxoxdx 0

Wednesday 1 February 2012 21:46

Sorry but lol

akg98 13

Sunday 10 June 2012 7:23

O wow

Greggums 2

Friday 10 August 2012 10:39

Ouch

thefmlman2011 36

Sunday 26 August 2012 8:58

The boobs of a lady, is like the balls of a guy.....

Boris4Life 4

Friday 5 October 2012 11:38

PERFECT!!!! Da.....DaDaDa........DaDaDa......

BoomerSpaulding 1

Saturday 20 October 2012 19:50

Classy

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The Top

Today, I wanted to show my friends my cat’s “high-five” trick. I held out my hand, and instead of a high-five, my cat scratched and bit me instead. I yelped, and my friends burst into laughter. I had to bandage my hand, all whilst they joked about “cat training.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 375

Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 632

You deserved it 78

The Top

Today, while walking to my car through the snow, I noticed the sunroof was open and 2 feet of snow had poured in. Angry, I opened the door to start cleaning. That's when I noticed all the wildlife that had taken refuge inside from the cold. Not only were my seat cushions wet, they were torn open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 888

You deserved it 26 334

Today, I got accused of trying to steal clothes because I was taking so long in the fitting rooms with only a couple of items. I got stuck in one of the shirts I was trying on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 359

You deserved it 5 399

Today, while playing on stage, the singer of my band swung his microphone around, straight into my face. I now have stitches above my right eye, and a job interview in three days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 932

You deserved it 304

Today, while at my job in a candy store, a boy stuck his hand into the bin, contaminating the candy. As I politely explained that the dad had to purchase the affected candy he refused, yelled, then angrily agreed to buy them. The total cost of the candy with the extra pieces? $1.69. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 924

You deserved it 779

Today, my friend got a text showing his girlfriend cheating on him. Sounds like his FML, but he was at my house. He then worked his way through a bottle of my whisky and went into a drunken rage. He threw my furniture through windows, punched holes in the wall, and smashed stuff until I had to call the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 691

You deserved it 111

Today, I was enjoying my last day of Spring Break in Panama City. I got up to dance on the stage at the Holiday Inn in front of hundreds of college kids. I tried to be sexy by turning around and bending over. My friends took pictures and my bloody tampon string was hanging out the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 058

You deserved it 106 696