Health: Today, I was online looking up ways to lose weight, get thinner...

By Fattymuch - 14/09/2011 14:27 - India

Today, I was online looking up ways to lose weight, get thinner and be healthier, all the while eating a slab of brownie that was half the size of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 966

You deserved it 51 984

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Same thing different taste

Coach Class

By GetFuzzy - 18/10/2019 12:00

Today, I was on the phone with my diet coach. I was telling her how I lost 3 pounds this week. I was saying this while eating a bag of chips, a beer in my hand and cooking a 3-meat pizza. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 2 057

Mixed signals

By Anonymous - 04/11/2021 19:59 - New Zealand - Nelson

Today, I got told I was too fat and needed to stop eating, because I need to lose weight. I was then given a full plate of food and had to eat it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 898

You deserved it 151

Overthinking it

By omgreally91 - 12/10/2011 23:39 - United States

Today, I spent an hour photoshopping my face onto super skinny models as inspiration for a diet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 576

You deserved it 30 369

By daydreamer - 29/07/2012 05:12 - United States - Wilton

Today, I began to daydream about going on a diet and losing some weight. As I did so, I unknowingly reached for a giant bag of chips and ate the whole thing. Now, I have stopped daydreaming and am sitting alone and depressed. And I'm all out of chips. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 169

You deserved it 29 301

Healthy mind in a healthy body

By Anonymous - 04/08/2021 12:59 - Brazil - Niter?i

Today, I started a diet to lose the 20lbs I put on during quarantine. It was also the day my body decided the diminished food intake means I'm trying to starve it to death, and must be punished with a horrible migraine. That's what I get for trying to be healthier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 752

You deserved it 223

By nick - 12/05/2010 09:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to go on a diet to lose some weight before summer. This was followed by the arrival of a giant parcel full of candy from my mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 277

You deserved it 5 993

By scorned ex - 17/10/2015 03:29

Today, my ex-boyfriend sent me an email that read, "How to lose 25lbs". I was eating a large slice of pie when I opened the email. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 427

You deserved it 7 811

Don't attempt this

By jammy - 25/06/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, after I completely starved myself for a week and exercised every day in an attempt to lose weight, I instead gained 5 pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 263

The body keeps the score

By Dominik - 11/11/2022 10:00 - Netherlands

Today, I ate 30 chocolate pocket brownies, two caramel chocolates, two Budweisers. All of that while on my breaks at work. I'm a guy and I'm worried about getting diabetes while i'm actually craving more chocolate and sugar treats, my body is getting weaker, I'm getting dumber, fatter, and slower as we speak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 285

You deserved it 1 194

By mattlikesfunions - 18/07/2016 18:56 - United States - Federal Way

Today, I told my parents that I was going on a diet to lose weight and I wanted their support. They brought home donuts and pizza for dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 747

You deserved it 1 236

NomOnShroomz 14

Wednesday 14 September 2011 18:56

Omnomnom don't fight it, brownies are amazing.

candicurl 9

Wednesday 14 September 2011 19:03

Looks like that diet * puts on sunglasses* will have to weight. YEAAAAAHHHHHHH

Comments

moodyreallyrocks 27

Wednesday 8 February 2012 18:01

Eat, sleep and be merry and tomorrow we diet!!!!

xxhailstorm18759 7

Friday 17 February 2012 22:22

Yeah, you are a total genius.

jremy7 0

Tuesday 21 August 2012 8:42

An FML because you can't control what you shove down your gullet?? That's absurd. Relax fatty and get some will power.

loserboii 11

Sunday 23 September 2012 20:41

It's the effort that counts

ricio1991 3

Thursday 4 October 2012 6:34

Eat a fiber one bar instead lol thats the way you have to go and exercise! There is a solution to everything

Chris20003 17

Wednesday 30 January 2013 20:11

Tip number 1: Do not eat a whole slab of brownies to yourself.

blackwidowtaco 31

Monday 19 August 2013 21:14

Put laxatives in your brownies.

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