Health, Pranks and Dad jokes: Today, I was out jogging. As I took a rest to have a drink of...

By FamilyLoving - 19/08/2013 16:00 - United States - Patchogue

Today, I was out jogging. As I took a rest to have a drink of water, a car pulled onto the sidewalk and bumped into me. Not just any car; my dad's car. He then drove away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 116

You deserved it 3 826

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By CROCKIN5150 - 14/03/2016 04:32 - United States

Today, while out for a jog, I noticed that you never know how fast you run until you're being followed by someone in a car you don't know, and they're continuously honking at you. I later found out it my dad in his new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 806

You deserved it 2 322

By Richocet - 18/05/2009 00:35 - Canada

Today, I was walking home from piano lessons when I saw my dad on a bike, so I shouted after him. He turned his head around and then ran into a tree. It wasn't my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 165

You deserved it 36 332

Good one, thanks

By RYZILLAHitZ - 30/06/2011 01:32 - United States

Today, as I was walking home from work, my dad drove past, pulled over, rolled down the window and asked, "Are you tired of walking?" To which I replied "Yes!" Just as I reached for the car door, he yelled "RUN A WHILE" and sped off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 071

You deserved it 5 761

Two in one

By cactii - 16/02/2015 20:43 - United States

Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 446

You deserved it 14 433

Not a prank, bro!

By Anonymous - 23/09/2019 16:00

Today, I went for a run when my shin splints acted up, so I called my dad to have him come pick me up. When I saw his car approaching, I stuck out my thumb like a hitchhiker, as a joke. The car pulled over to give me a ride. It wasn't my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 278

You deserved it 847

By mild banana - 16/06/2016 16:55 - United States - Cedar Hill

Today, I was kicking my soccer ball with my father. My mom pulled out in the car without checking and ran into to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 971

You deserved it 1 231

Drunken antics

By DevilsTemptation - 29/08/2019 02:01 - United Kingdom - Dundee

Today, my dad got extremely drunk, so I took away his car keys and left on foot. When I came back, I saw that he had broken down my door. Now my dad is mad at me for not giving him the keys when he was drunk, and I'm door-less. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 777

You deserved it 162

By RiceCrispyTreats - 01/09/2015 16:46 - United States - Pelham

Today, I left my phone outside on the grass while I went inside to get a drink. I didn't expect my dad to run over it with the lawn mower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 863

You deserved it 28 380

McSteamy

By Anonymous - 07/11/2021 11:00

Today, I illicitly borrowed my dad's car to go to the store, but crashed into my mom's car as she and dad were returning from my grandma's house. Both cars are totalled, my mom is in hospital with a broken collarbone, and I realised dads really can make steam come out their ears if they’re really mad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 209

You deserved it 2 171

Fast Cars

By Chris21 - 11/09/2019 22:04 - United Kingdom - Bolton

Today, a drunk driver totalled my new Audi. Who was the drunk driver? My dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 990

You deserved it 161

josh7279 7

Monday 19 August 2013 22:04

Tag you're it!

Welshite 39

Monday 19 August 2013 22:19

I don't always recognize my children, but when I do I make sure to hit them with my vehicle.

Comments

masika15 16

Monday 19 August 2013 22:09

Maybe he thought you weren't moving fast enough, wanted to give you that extra push.

HeartOfLead 24

Monday 19 August 2013 22:09

It sounds like your dad is a pushy exercise coach. But he is just trying to help you bump down your weight. If you don't like it, tell him to go the *beep* home.

Blazinthatshit 9

Wednesday 21 August 2013 20:09

Why do people like you take these FMLs so seriously? I doubt he was being an excersize coach. He was probably just trying to be funny. I run kids over all the time, it's hilarious.

JasonUMN 15

Monday 19 August 2013 22:13

It was just a love tap to motivate you to go!

ViviMage 38

Monday 19 August 2013 22:13

File a police report against him for hitting a pedestrian with a car.

michelleJ11 25

Monday 19 August 2013 22:16

I hope you're kidding ...

jeffwolff96 6

Monday 19 August 2013 22:15

Was he blaring Eye of the tiger as he did it?? cause it could be motivation.

xenmarkal51 6

Monday 19 August 2013 22:18

You should hav3 flicked him off to see if he would come back!

Welshite 39

Monday 19 August 2013 22:23

Fathers aren't quite mosquitos.

DrownedMyFish 18

Monday 19 August 2013 23:06

Why did you replace the e in have with a 3?

RedPillSucks 31

Tuesday 20 August 2013 4:07

the 3 is right above the e on many keyboards. Just a typo.

redpanda11 10

Wednesday 21 August 2013 3:07

#25 I think #19 means flipped off not flicked

gracehi 31

Monday 19 August 2013 22:23

A love tap? That's what I call it when I punch my brother in the arm. Your dad just used a multi-ton machine instead of his fist. That must mean he loves you a lot! You sure are lucky, OP. I sure wish I had someone who loved me enough to strike me with their car and drive away.

perdix 29

Monday 19 August 2013 22:30

He tried to make a quick getaway hoping you wouldn't be able to make a positive ID. Do you have a creepy uncle that resembles him? Yes? Then, it was him!!!