Kids: Today, I was performing a show about pirates for a youth program....

By Anonymous - 05/03/2011 06:07 - Canada

Today, I was performing a show about pirates for a youth program. A child started crying because I wasn't a real pirate. A little girl took my defense, saying, "He's a real pirate, his teeth are all yellow!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 610

You deserved it 11 380

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Same thing different taste

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By iliveformystery - 31/10/2014 15:56 - United States - Oshkosh

Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed as a pirate. Someone complimented me on how convincing the fake teeth were that I had on for my costume. I wasn't wearing fake teeth. FML

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By eyepatch - 19/02/2017 10:00 - United States - Albany

Today, while I was giving a school presentation about life as an injured, deformed soldier, someone asked if the reason I wear an eyepatch is because I'm a pirate. I wouldn't have minded, had I not been presenting to high-school students. FML

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Today, the kid I was tutoring told me that, "Pirates were a myth. Like the Greeks and Romans." He's 16. FML

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Today, I babysat for two little girls, who wanted to play 'mermaids'. I smiled, and said that I would love to play with them. The older girl laughed, saying "You can't be a mermaid. Mermaids are pretty." FML

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Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

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By Jamie - 20/09/2013 00:47 - United States - Newport News

Today, I was at work at Krispy Kreme for national "talk like a pirate" day. If you dressed like a pirate you'd get a free dozen donuts. A man came in with just an eyepatch on. Thinking he was trying to get a free dozen, I told him he needed to try harder. Turned out the eyepatch was real. FML

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By Black Cat 13 - 04/09/2010 06:52 - United States

Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML

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By Anonymous - 19/04/2009 18:42 - United States

Today, I was babysitting a 5-year-old girl and we were coloring. She made me a card that was very sweet, so I smiled. She looked at me and went "Don't smile, your smile is really scary." FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 715

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By WTF - 22/04/2009 19:46 - United States

Today, my son and I were on an airplane playing "I Spy" to pass the time. The game went back and forth a few times when my son said, "I spy something yellow." After pointing out numerous yellow objects on the plane I gave up. He said, "Daddy! It's your teeth!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 576

You deserved it 19 404

Doortje 29

Saturday 5 March 2011 12:12

Arr, time to brush your teeth, mate.

chrstygrl06 10

Saturday 5 March 2011 11:54

She's right, you must be!

Comments

locachick101 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 13:09

hahaha aw dang that's mess up yo. and rude. but forreal go brush your teeth that's kinda nasty and that's what coffee does to ya

ChibiChibi_fml 27

Saturday 5 March 2011 21:10

Brushing doesn't mean that ones teeth will magically be white, it just means that with any luck they will be less yellow and you won't have awful breath. The OP could brush two or three times every day and still have yellow teeth depending on what he eats and drinks, or if he smokes. This is a case of needing to go to the dentist for a professional cleaning.

SeasonedLemur 5

Saturday 5 March 2011 13:31

Brush your teeth you cuuuuunt!!

nymphy 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 14:51

****? that's completely uncalled for.

ZackAttack20 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 13:36

ydi for not practicing dental hygiene

Bakachu 7

Saturday 5 March 2011 13:39

At least she tried.

ShelboTron 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 13:45

YDI dude. Brush your teeth.

Vanilor_fml 5

Saturday 5 March 2011 13:49

Brush yer teeth, matey.

stephyhull 4

Saturday 5 March 2011 14:10

brush your teeth?

danniellekaulitz 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 14:20

Time for you to invest on a toothbrush and toothpaste ya?

zowieandzander77 1

Saturday 5 March 2011 14:46

was the show rated aarrrh

florecitabetch 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 14:54

really bad joke hear it before in spongebob squarepants

zowieandzander77 1

Saturday 5 March 2011 19:42

it was meant to be corny... the question is why are you still watching sponge bob?

KeirieMay 0

Saturday 5 March 2011 19:56

I still watch spongebob :)

ChibiChibi_fml 27

Saturday 5 March 2011 21:18

I have to ask out of sheer curiosity. What is the appeal of Spongebob Square Pants? I've seen a few episodes of that show and everyone of them made me think "if I had kids I sure as hell wouldn't be letting them watch this show". I know I'll probably get thumbed down for saying that but it's true. I make no judgments on those who do watch it, I say to each their own, but I honestly would like to hear some other opinions on the show from someone over the age of ten. What draws people to it?