Miscellaneous: Today, I was selling cookie dough for a fund raiser at an old...

By phatkroger10 - 10/04/2009 00:16 - United States

Today, I was selling cookie dough for a fund raiser at an old folks home. One lady ordered a box and told me that she loved cookie dough. I told her it'd be here in 4 weeks, she said "Oh I can't wait!". Not really thinking, as I left I said, "I hope you can make it till then!". FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 109

You deserved it 66 791

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Same thing different taste

By UTRejected - 21/11/2014 13:51 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 661

You deserved it 3 864

By grossesfesses - 15/05/2013 06:58 - France - Compi?gne

Today, in the doctor's waiting room, a little boy asked me for a cookie. I told him that I didn't have any. He replied, "But my mom says that ladies with big butts always have cookies in their handbags." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 877

You deserved it 6 422

Near the knuckle

By Anonymous - 20/10/2020 05:01

Today, as a waitress I served someone who was hoping their food would come back faster than expected. I replied, “Fingers crossed!” just for the person to show me they had no hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 902

You deserved it 127

By Anonymous - 10/06/2012 08:47 - United States - Kent

Today, while at my cosmetics job, an elderly lady came up to me asking for a product. I told her we had a smaller size and a larger size for a better deal. She told me she wanted the smaller size because she'd "probably be dead" before she finished that one. I laughed. She was serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 970

You deserved it 5 255

By anonymous - 30/06/2010 04:05 - United States

Today, my aunt and I wanted to do something nice. So we made cookies for a local nursing home. After tasting them, nobody ate any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 863

You deserved it 6 024

By anonymous - 17/07/2014 02:46 - United States - Romulus

Today, while working as a barista, a customer yelled about her muffins and butter not being ready since she only had a "short time to eat". There were 7 tip giving customers ahead of her, but I rushed her order. She gave no tip and stayed for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 005

You deserved it 5 228

By bakerysux - 23/12/2014 01:21 - United States - San Antonio

Today, at work, a customer cried because the cake I made her was not "exactly" the same as the display. I'm the one who made the display and it was the same but the display cake had faded a bit, since it had been there for a month. I'd mentioned this to the customer when she placed the order. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 553

You deserved it 2 218

By KMKWEEN - 16/02/2009 14:37 - United States

Today, I was at work. I work at a grocery store and a woman pulls a cart to me filled with chips, breads, lunch meats, and sodas. I said to her "Looks like you are going to have a fun party" she then looks at me and says "My mother just died, this is for after the funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 913

You deserved it 10 693

Helper Blues

By Fat and Embarrassed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Palmdale

Today, I asked an elderly customer at my work if she needed help with her groceries. She responded, "I normally would, but I'm afraid you'll eat all the groceries." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 210

You deserved it 1 498

By I'm so sorry... - 01/03/2017 16:00

Today, a coworker left a chocolate cake on the "free food" table in the office. I had a slice. She's just called to ask if she left her grandmother's birthday cake at work. She made it from scratch. Now I'm baking a new cake in the office kitchen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 683

You deserved it 1 531

dumpweedx 0

Friday 10 April 2009 9:49

That's horrible. :/ PS - why does an order of cookie dough take 4 weeks? o_O

kika_fml 0

Friday 10 April 2009 9:55

I don't really get how this is a FML. It just sounds like you're an insensitive jerk.

Comments

iftheglovefits 0

Sunday 12 December 2010 21:52

it mean

peaceful505 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 9:04

FHL, how do u think she feels?

pikapika94 0

Saturday 14 May 2011 18:25

#11- I agree! they prolly didn't mean it in a bad way

neongurl98 10

Monday 4 July 2011 19:13

THATS EVIL!!

TypicuL 0

Friday 22 July 2011 23:24

Are you kidding me? You're cruel...

lacrossegirl775 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 19:07

He didn't mean I hope you live that long he meant I hope you can wait that long. Idiots. He's not a jerk...

andyroddickfan 0

Tuesday 12 June 2012 4:10

You are truly a great person. Keep up the complements please you make the world a better place

lyflycat9297 4

Thursday 29 November 2012 2:18

Oops, try to watch what you say OP!

Harle 24

Tuesday 2 April 2013 2:39

Nice going

tiredofwaiting 25

Monday 3 August 2015 21:44

You are an insensitive jerk. Not much of a fml.

Keywords

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Today, one of my 5-year-old son's teeth fell out, but he's quite scatterbrained and he lost it. He did however find my vibrating duck under my pillow, and is now crying because he thinks that I stole his tooth so that the tooth fairy would bring me a toy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 145

You deserved it 7 104

Today, my roommate wanted me to try out a new bus route home, I knew it might take longer but she really wanted me to try, so I went with her. After waiting for ages at The Exchange bus stop for the last bus home, we missed it, and had to take an Uber. FML

I agree, your life sucks 563

You deserved it 174

The Top

Today, I invited my elderly mother to come stay with my husband and I during this outbreak, just until everything calms down. She declined because we said she couldn’t bring her boyfriend. Her boyfriend is a 34 year-old leech who's been living off her for over a year. She refuses to change her mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 616

You deserved it 223

Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our six-month anniversary. And by that, I mean he brought along his obnoxious best friend, and I paid for everyone's dinner at an expensive restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 665

You deserved it 7 550

Today, my coworker volunteered me to drop laptops off at two sites outside our normal areas. I asked if they were safe from COVID-19. "I don't know, but you're young. You'll be okay," responded the man who's been working from home for weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 580

You deserved it 216

Today, after having an amazing first date with my long time crush, we ended up going out to dinner. We shared a meal, and it was delicious! This would have been the ultimate dream come true... Except for the part about me throwing up in his car on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 492

You deserved it 1 120

Today, I got pulled over for speaking on my phone. I accepted the fine because I was too ashamed to tell the cute officer that I was actually trying to pop a huge pimple on my cheek. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 241

You deserved it 13 261

Today, I decided to check out a dating site, when I stumbled across my ex wife's profile. She'd had it for four out of the five years of our marriage. And no, it didn't rate us as a good match. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 819

You deserved it 3 865

Same thing different taste

Near the knuckle

Helper Blues

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