Health: Today, I was sent to the front office for having blood shot eyes... - FML

By Phabia - 21/04/2015 00:16 - United States - Newton

Today, I was sent to the front office for having blood shot eyes and smelling like smoke. I just didn't get enough sleep and had trouble putting my contacts in, and I always smell like smoke because of my parents' excessive smoking. They didn't believe me. My parents had to come in to back me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 964

You deserved it 2 338

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By dragynfyre - 06/03/2012 05:37 - United States

Today, my boss called me out for a drug test. His reason was because my eyes are puffy and bloodshot, making me look high. I've been suffering from allergies all week, but still had to pee in a cup in front of a complete stranger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 906

You deserved it 2 130

Would I lie to you?

By sarika - 24/07/2015 00:12 - United States - Appleton

Today, I had to explain to my boss that I was late to work because somehow my hand slipped when I was brushing my teeth, and I hit myself in the eye with the brush. I had to remove my contacts, wash my eye, and find my glasses. He didn't believe me, but at least my eye is minty fresh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 993

You deserved it 2 385

By nzkristy - 03/01/2010 10:59 - New Zealand

Today, I got sent home from work for appearing stoned/under the influence of drugs. I suffer from severe hay fever, which no antihistamine has fixed yet, hence the red and glassy eyes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 950

You deserved it 2 281

Caught in 4K

By reptar2009 - 02/12/2009 00:49 - United States

Today, my parents found cigarettes in my car. After a long argument lasting over an hour, I convinced them that they weren't mine and that I don't smoke. A few minutes later, I went to work. Guess who decided to visit me during my smoke break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 425

You deserved it 87 579

Sketchy

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, it was my first day with new contacts, but I found out they make my eyes red and itchy. Today was also the day I had a very important meeting. They think I showed up stoned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 299

You deserved it 3 459

By Mattrd - 05/02/2013 00:42 - United States

Today, my coworker told me that I needed to quit smoking because it was making me look and smell horrible. I've never smoked in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 690

You deserved it 3 942

By Lexxiluvstwat - 15/05/2018 20:30

Today, I was written up at work and sent home 20 minutes into my shift. My boss thought I was under the influence of something, but it’s really just the first time I’ve come to work with no makeup on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 506

You deserved it 377

By Sir Smokalot - 24/09/2009 08:05 - France

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. When we got there, I hugged his mother, and she glared at me. Later that day, I heard her telling her son that he should leave me because I smell like cigarettes, and she hates smokers. I don't smoke, my boyfriend does. He did all the way there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 215

You deserved it 2 889

Quit staring

By Insomniac - 15/06/2022 00:00

Today, I was written up at work for "leering at my boss". I'm so sorry for having my eyes sore due to lack of sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 129

By gothicvamp93 - 04/01/2015 06:46 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, my boss called and yelled at me because he said I was "spotted" out after I called off sick. I was out getting the medicine the doctor had just prescribed me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 165

You deserved it 2 376

Next

Top comments

HarshD9619 34

Tuesday 21 April 2015 10:38

It's funny how the date on the FMl is 4/20

timb1234 13

Tuesday 21 April 2015 10:34

Dont smoke kids. You'll get in trouble

Comments

lostinareverie 21

Tuesday 21 April 2015 19:59

Your parents were the smoking gun to your story.

mjansing 4

Tuesday 21 April 2015 20:16

been there, i had a vice principal who thought every kid was on drugs.

nrubs11 9

Tuesday 21 April 2015 20:46

Hah. Nobody ever believes kids.

Herrochild 10

Tuesday 21 April 2015 22:39

I'm sorry. That really sucks

unsuspectingmom 5

Tuesday 21 April 2015 23:14

But tobacco and weed smell totally different

kingneirad 9

Wednesday 22 April 2015 0:15

4/20 blaze it

militarybrat 21

Wednesday 22 April 2015 6:05

So selfish of your parents to smoke around you op, FYL.

sjimpleton 18

Thursday 23 April 2015 20:33

why didn't you get enough sleep

Emily282828 2

Saturday 25 April 2015 17:28

That's shitty of your parents to smoke around you

Keywords

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The Top

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Today, a classmate wished me a “Happy Cinco De Mayo” and bought me a Mexican sombrero to wear, and little paper Mexican flags to wave around. I’m Venezuelan. FML

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