Intimacy: Today, I was so inexplicably horny that I had to shuffle awkwardly... - FML

By Hormones apparently - 08/12/2015 02:32 - United States - Westerville

Spicy

Today, I was so inexplicably horny that I had to shuffle awkwardly and use my bag to hide the wetness of my pants as I left work for the day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 978

You deserved it 3 559

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Leaked

By Anonymous - 16/01/2023 10:00

Spicy

Today, I had morning sex before I had to rush to work, and everything decided to leak out of me over an hour later into my underwear. I quickly rinsed them in the bathroom and put them back on, only the wet patch then soaked into my pants when I sat down, so it looked like I’d majorly peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 1 317

By Anonymous - 18/06/2016 14:09 - United States - Concord

Spicy

Today, I got really horny during a 10 hour shift, so I snuck into a storage room and relieved myself. Then as I went to leave the room, I noticed the security camera above the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 038

You deserved it 25 423

By Employee - 07/08/2012 19:17 - United States - Lincoln

Today, while at work, I used the restroom. After I noticed we were out of paper towels, I just tried shaking my hands dry. I then readjusted my bra, since it'd been driving me crazy all day. After getting back to my cubicle, I realized that I had two wet handprints over my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 434

You deserved it 12 611

Pissed

By Matt - 13/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 181

You deserved it 530

Where on Earth do you work?

By Embarrassed ass. - 23/10/2015 04:05 - United States - Oregon City

Spicy

Today, while on a walk during lunch, I urgently needed to pee. Not thinking I could make it back to the office, I slipped into some bushes to relieve myself. As I was going, I looked to the side and saw two coworkers staring back at me. They were having sex, and I'm there with my dick out. Awkward. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 887

You deserved it 3 943

By pissed - 10/05/2015 14:34 - United States - Dearborn

Today, during a very stressful and busy day at work, I took a bathroom break. Unfortunately, of all the things on my mind, taking down my pants before emptying my bladder wasn't one of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 842

You deserved it 8 035

"I'm horny, horny horny horny"

By Anonymous - 29/09/2020 23:01

Spicy

Today, I got incredibly horny at work. No one was in the office, so I spread out on my yoga mat and started to masturbate. All of the sudden, I heard a forklift outside. I quickly tried to hide, but I think the construction worker caught me. He’ll be working here all month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 3 105

Slipping up

By Anonymous - 06/04/2024 05:00 - United States - Richardson

Today, while I was at work, I didn't have any panty liners so I used tissue. I was taking orders when I suddenly felt the tissue trailing down my leg. I tried not to move, but it inevitably fell through my pants onto the floor in front of my co-workers. I swiftly put it into my pocket. Luckily, it had nothing on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 455

You deserved it 145

By MissCan'tKeepAJob - 23/08/2011 16:18 - United States

Spicy

Today, I work by myself at a retail store and I was bored so I called my boyfriend. I woke him up and he was feeling frisky, and as things were getting heated I started to moan and say dirty things. Until the entire rack of clothes fell over and revealed my boss hiding. He had a boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 126

You deserved it 57 581

By PissyPuss - 10/12/2015 21:38 - United States

Today, the bladder infection I thought I was over flared up at work, causing me to piss myself, despite having gone twice in the previous hour. I still had to finish my shift, soaked pants and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 877

You deserved it 1 856

Next

Top comments

Adam_Power58 16

Tuesday 8 December 2015 12:28

You must really love your job

InnocenceBlue 37

Tuesday 8 December 2015 12:23

OP needs to get laid.

Comments

GAeroNKissR 26

Wednesday 9 December 2015 3:39

Panty liners are made for this very purpose. Some of us just have a higher drive ;-)

militarybrat 21

Wednesday 9 December 2015 5:19

This happens to me if I don't ****** in a certain time frame. My suggestion is to ********** if you don't have someone to help.

berkeleyjake 13

Wednesday 9 December 2015 9:07

that's what men need to deal with every day when we get bonkers for no reason.

toasted1 13

Thursday 10 December 2015 12:07

fap

zr11990 8

Thursday 10 December 2015 14:41

I can help you with that

xenomsftw 19

Thursday 10 December 2015 18:13

Why not just go to the bathroom and use some toilet paper to clean up?

rogerover 19

Friday 11 December 2015 1:44

Be willing to admit what it is that is making you so horny. A guy at work... A smell...a situation?

STFU01 14

Friday 25 December 2015 22:28

I will help you...

kainpwnsu 19

Saturday 26 December 2015 7:08

"I want what SHE'S having."

_HelloSweetie_ 1

Monday 28 December 2015 9:03

This happens way to often for me. Im 19, and for some reason i get horny at literally everything. Ive had random sex in bathrooms with guys i dont know because i got so extremely horny i just ended up seducing some random guy

Ultimate_Batman 28

Thursday 31 December 2015 16:44

*****

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Keywords

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The Top

Good morning guys! Today's interview has been done in some extreme circumstances. It was about 36° Celsius, and half of the Completely Serious Comics crew was working while the other one was cooking. Well, it was a bit crazy as you can imagine. So m...

I agree, your life sucks 18

You deserved it 17

Today, my husband filed for divorce. He also put himself “In a relationship” with my daughter on Facebook. She turned 18 a few days ago. He says it’s no big deal because, “at least I waited until she was legal.” The spineless idiot just doesn’t get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 087

You deserved it 160

The Top

Today, I watched as my poor old cat dragged his ass across our living room carpet, leaving an equally long shit stain on our pristine carpet. My pleas for him to stop only made his diarrhea worse as he ran off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 517

You deserved it 326

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 468

You deserved it 28 231

Today, I snuck out of the house to go to a party. When I got back later, I tried climbing back up the rope-ladder I'd set up earlier, leading back through my bedroom window. I was halfway up when it broke free. I sprained both my ankles and had to shamefully ring the doorbell to get back in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 105

You deserved it 55 185

Today, a guy asked me why I'm single. As a joke, I told him that not only do I have a penis, but that it's so large that most men are intimidated by it. He wasn't impressed. And I actually wonder why I'm single. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 289

You deserved it 32 047

Today, I got a really bad cramp while I was swimming in my neighborhood pool. I started to go under until the lifeguard jumped in and saved me. I guess it would have been great, if I wasn't a fellow lifeguard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 771

You deserved it 6 160

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 767

You deserved it 39 266