Embarrassing, Awkward and Transportation: Today, I was taking the subway to work when I saw a really hot...

By Anonymous - 29/04/2009 22:46 - United States

Today, I was taking the subway to work when I saw a really hot girl. Noticing that she, like me, had a Dunkin' Donuts coffee, I tried to start a conversation by saying, "Is that Double Ds you have there?" She didn't pick up that I was talking about the coffee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 893

You deserved it 97 284

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

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Same thing different taste

By 6u174r_d00d - 10/08/2011 21:10 - United States

Today, I saw a cute girl working register at my regular coffee shop and politely asked the her for her number. I was brutally rejected. A few minutes later, a douchebag with a popped collar approached her with a cheesy pickup line and left with not only her number, but a free frappe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 054

You deserved it 6 133

Joe Smooth

By Anonymous - 09/12/2023 18:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I thought I was being smooth by using a pickup line on a cute barista. I confidently said, "Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears." She replied, "Actually, I'm a barista, and everyone else is waiting for their coffee. Next!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 1 151

By anonymous - 05/05/2009 14:17 - United States

Today, a hot girl got into the elevator just as I took a bite out of my Three Musketeers bar. I instinctively smiled at her and chocolate drool poured out of my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 386

You deserved it 59 714

By Anonymous - 19/06/2009 05:26 - United States

Today, I went through the drive-through at Dunkin Donuts and asked for an iced coffee. After no response, I started frantically screaming about bad service. After a while, a woman came out to my car and said, "Please pull up to the speaker." I'd been yelling at a garbage bin for 5 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 475

You deserved it 124 920

Smiley smile

By Eh.. - 05/12/2018 04:00 - Israel

Today, I learned that just because the cute barista at the train station smiles, waves at me each time I arrive, and develops small talk, probably means she's trying to sell me pastries. The smile she had when I asked for her number, and the way she said, "Nah" still haunts me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 481

You deserved it 1 615

By crétin-crédule - 26/02/2013 05:02 - France - Isle

Today, I got talking to a pretty girl on the subway. Just as she was about to get off, I handed her my phone so that she could give me her number. She ran out with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 125

You deserved it 51 294

By Idiot on the bus - 25/03/2017 12:00

Today, I saw a beautiful girl on the bus. Struck up a good conversation, walked with her all the way to my office. Forgot to ask her name and number. This is the second time I've done this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 162

You deserved it 1 612

By Anonymous - 27/12/2014 21:15 - United States

Today, I was chatting with the girl of my dreams, a real heart-to-heart. Everything was going great, and I asked her if she'd like to get coffee together sometime. She immediately backed away and excused herself, mumbling something about not dating left-handed people. Huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 425

You deserved it 2 696

Nice

By Anonymous - 27/07/2024 09:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a coffee shop, trying to get to know the cute new barista. I wanted to compliment his nice eyes, but I got nervous and blurted out, "You have nice elbows!" He stared at me, confused, as I quickly grabbed my coffee and left. Now I can't even imagine going back there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 164

You deserved it 424

It's not what you think

By lifedoessuck12 - 19/07/2009 14:13 - Philippines

Today, I had to wait outside Starbucks. While standing, I started daydreaming and didn't notice I had been staring at a table beside the window for a long time. Suddenly, someone came up to me and said, "Try not to be so obvious." Sitting at the table was a girl with a huge cleavage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 906

You deserved it 11 787

yodelqueen13 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 2:52

haha mistaken sexual harrassment sucks

arela 0

Thursday 30 April 2009 2:55

what the **** who says double D's for dunkin donuts you douche you deserve it

Comments

XxFA1LxX 4

Thursday 29 April 2010 3:27

catch line win.

HunterOrHunted 0

Tuesday 25 May 2010 23:20

bahahahaha lmfao so ****** hilarious

skittlebabe 0

Thursday 16 September 2010 16:31

haha

antonio12388 0

Monday 27 September 2010 6:04

way to go dumbass

starberries 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 18:21

"Is that Dunkin Donuts you have there?" "Um... that's what it says on the cup, weirdo." Wouldn't work anyway.

angel55033 12

Friday 29 October 2010 9:44

umm yea nice pick up line idiot

biggecko 4

Friday 5 November 2010 3:18

I would have keeped goin along with it and be like I love how plump your double d's are I wonder how good they taste mmmmmm

alpha14_fml 0

Thursday 13 January 2011 7:39

YDI..seriously, who calls it that. FHL for having to deal with your perverted self.

doltkid 3

Tuesday 1 March 2011 7:47

smooth move Romeo.

PrincessesCrown 17

Wednesday 30 March 2011 5:06

Op you sound more smart when your mouth is shut

Keywords

Embarrassing Work Awkward Money Insects Sex Intimacy Animals Cats Health Kids Neighbours Love Dating First Dates Students Alcohol Parents Miscellaneous Fight Shopping AITA Parenting Am I overreacting? Poopoo peepee Weird Cheating Drugs I need your advice Relatable

The Top

Today, my girlfriend and I went on vacation. We flew 2000 miles, got off the plane, got our bags and stood outside the airport for our ride. She looks at me and says, "I can't do this anymore." So, she broke up with me and flew back home. Now I'm on vacation alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 329

You deserved it 4 035

Today, while my mom was out, my family agreed upon the assumption that she has a "shopping problem." I argued against it for quite a while, until she pulled up minutes later with a what seemed like a life-time supply of canned condensed milk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 575

You deserved it 4 942

The Top

Today, my mom didn’t answer the phone when I called. My husband promptly said, with a straight face, “Would you answer you?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 439

You deserved it 153

Today, I found out that the huge project I've been working on for the past week is actually a group project. Everyone in my group knew. They were just letting me do the entire thing by myself because I'm "smart". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 653

You deserved it 2 636

Today, I stayed in a hotel near the college I was applying for a scholarship. We were eating breakfast and there were some other applicants in the breakfast room. As we walked away, my mother yelled, "My daughter's gonna get this scholarship so there's no reason for you muddafuckas to show up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 539

You deserved it 3 659

Today, my girlfriend furiously bitched me out because I got more upset about my phone screen cracking than when she told me about the death of her cat. We hadn't even met when her cat died. Did she expect me to burst into tears from hearing the story? Guess who's single again… FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 148

You deserved it 3 453

Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my nose. I wasn't driving. I walked right into it. It was parked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 851

You deserved it 42 496

Today, after doing inventory at my job, I was approached by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute. I tried talking to her, but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker. Now she assumes that I'm "special". FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 863

You deserved it 2 490