Intimacy: Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while...

By Anonymous - 14/04/2014 03:17 - United States

Today, I was talking dirty with my husband over the phone while he was out of town. I started to verbally act out his fantasy and got quite into it. I was returned with silence. Embarrassed, I tried to hang up. Turns out the call had already been dropped, five minutes prior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 983

You deserved it 7 876

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Same thing different taste

TMI

By SoggyPancakes - 11/03/2009 19:49 - United States

Today, I decided to call my wife while she was having a private lunch with my parents. I began to tell her all the nasty things I was going to do to her in bed. Halfway through my fantasy, she giggled and told me that she was going to take me off speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 822

You deserved it 71 899

Revealing

By kitkat545 - 15/06/2009 23:18 - United States

Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 080

You deserved it 51 001

Kinky

By 9gingerface66 - 15/01/2012 06:29 - United States

Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 873

You deserved it 4 683

Listen up

By Ryan - 01/09/2022 21:00 - Canada - Quesnel

Today, after getting off the phone with a client, I got horny so I put on some porn and cranked one out. After I'd finished, I realized I hadn't ended the call and neither had my client. They heard everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 269

You deserved it 2 038

Hot and heavy

By Lickmylovepump - 19/01/2012 04:09 - United States

Today, my boyfriend insisted that we try phone sex. He started telling me all the things he wanted to do to me while breathing heavily. Unfortunately, it sounded so ridiculous, I burst out laughing. He hung up on me, and has refused to pick up since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 442

You deserved it 35 591

Ahem

By Bucko321 - 30/03/2009 01:18 - Canada

Today, I was on the phone with my boyfriend. We were feeling a little naughty, so we started talking dirty. I was really into describing a sweaty sex scene, when I heard my dad cough. He had picked up the other house phone to make a call, and had heard it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 724

You deserved it 78 322

By Eskyew - 23/07/2009 21:40 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were talking on the phone, and things got a little heated. We were in the middle of some kinky dialog, complete with hand action when he suddenly goes silent. While waiting for a response, I heard typing on the other end. He was checking his email. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 769

You deserved it 9 013

Phoney sex

By Anonymous - 09/03/2020 08:00

Today, after having some great, intimate phone sex with my boyfriend, he immediately said, "Well, gotta go," and hung up. Thanks for making me feel like some sort of phone-hooker, dude. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 253

You deserved it 617

By 504-A1 - 11/05/2012 22:02 - Canada - Barrie

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. Trying to be sexy, I told him what I was doing with my vibrator. I heard a loud bang, followed by him shouting, "Why don't you just fucking marry it, then?!" and then hanging up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 517

You deserved it 10 415

So hott

By facepalm - 27/02/2009 08:39 - Singapore

Today, I was having phone sex with my boyfriend. About halfway through he went really quiet and started breathing heavily. I thought he was about to climax until I discovered he had fallen asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 772

You deserved it 15 178

FranklySpeaking 11

Monday 14 April 2014 11:28

Call him back and resume the sexy talk. Since he missed out on some of it, you can do it even better this time.

Capitan 15

Monday 14 April 2014 11:27

At least you got some good practice in.

Comments

fleur_de_fevrier_fml 22

Monday 14 April 2014 11:42

Don't worry OP, take that as a rehearsal for next time ^^. Once you pass over the first moment of embarassment, it's pretty hilarious :)

piggybits 14

Monday 14 April 2014 11:46

The call dropped for 5 minutes and you never got the busy tone?

mooman36 15

Monday 14 April 2014 11:51

You don't get a tone when on a mobile. I assume she was.

piggybits 14

Monday 14 April 2014 13:49

Fair enough

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 14 April 2014 23:51

Makes one yearn for the simpler times when phones had error tones.

Duh_0811 17

Monday 14 April 2014 11:50

As it sounds to me, he's a lucky man to have such a good wife.

Sirmrcrowley 12

Monday 14 April 2014 11:56

What kind of dirty talk made him hang up?? Dishes? House? Clothes??

Wizardo 33

Monday 14 April 2014 12:00

Well you have some practice with it now, next time you'll blow his mind even harder with it, if you catch my drift...

Soundslikeothers 15

Monday 14 April 2014 12:09

5 minutes? That's a long time to not notice someone is not on the other line. Even if you are the one talking you want some sort of indication that the other person is enjoying or even listening.

bandnerd21 13

Monday 14 April 2014 12:18

That sucks

11shareef 4

Monday 14 April 2014 12:30

Not really that embarrassing. No one knew until you told everyone, lol. Your husband may wonder why you took so long to call back, but that's easy to get around if the call dropped.