Miscellaneous: Today, I was trying to apply some toothpaste on my pimple to...

By Anonymous - 25/09/2010 14:45 - Malaysia

Today, I was trying to apply some toothpaste on my pimple to help dry it out. My mum came from behind and hugged me, making me accidentally apply minty toothpaste into my right eye instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 867

You deserved it 4 697

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Same thing different taste

By Talented73 - 25/04/2017 20:00

Today, while brushing my teeth, I applied the toothpaste to my toothbrush when a few bristles got caught on the lip of the tube and flung a glob of toothpaste into my eye. My eye is now bloodshot, but at least it's minty fresh. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 132

You deserved it 399

Ouch

By Anonymous - 31/07/2020 02:03

Today, while brushing my teeth half asleep, I stabbed myself in the eye with my toothbrush, toothpaste included. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 568

By Anonymous - 30/06/2011 17:30 - United States

Today, I woke up to find that not only did the toothpaste I put on my pimple make it more noticable, but it made it worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 453

You deserved it 34 650

By Mirroronthewall - 30/08/2009 15:22 - Canada

Today, I was brushing my teeth in my bathroom. As I looked in the mirror I spotted a zit on my forehead. Keeping my toothbrush in my mouth, I quickly lean in towards the mirror to pop the pimple meanwhile lodging my toothbrush down my throat. I temporarily can't talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 765

You deserved it 44 232

By Noname - 09/11/2008 09:18 - France

Today, whilst brushing my teeth, I fell asleep poking myself in the eye with my toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 689

You deserved it 13 854

By inseriouspain - 22/08/2010 21:20 - United States

Today, I popped a zit and I went to put my acne medicine on it. It's in a clear bottle with a blue cap, just like the nearby nailpolish remover. I grabbed the wrong one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 479

You deserved it 14 578

Oh gosh

By Anonymous - 16/02/2020 14:00

Today, I noticed a strange mark on the inside of my mouthwash bottle. As I was bending down to investigate, my hands tightened around the bottle and mouthwash squirted in my eye. It still burns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 405

You deserved it 690

By lol - 06/12/2009 14:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I sneezed while brushing my teeth and ended up with toothpaste in my eye. I haven't been able to see clearly for two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 790

You deserved it 4 018

By Anonymous - 23/12/2015 17:11 - Germany

Today, as I passed a printout over my shoulder to my mum, I managed to give myself a papercut on my tear duct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 661

You deserved it 2 699

Double trouble

By Anonymous - 11/08/2012 06:21 - United States - Yucaipa

Today, I accidentally sprayed some perfume in my eye. After rinsing said burning eye with water for a few minutes, I half-blindly grabbed the eyedrops my sister left on the counter and used some. They were actually tea tree oil drops. Ouch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 644

You deserved it 5 669

BananaTroll 0

Saturday 25 September 2010 19:51

I love brushing my pimple too. It keeps its breath fresh and clean.

MissEmma_fml 22

Saturday 25 September 2010 20:03

At least of some wacko comes up to you and sniffs your eye, it'll smell minty fresh ^_^

Comments

wDeemish 0

Saturday 25 September 2010 22:23

lol shit. at least your mom loves you. ?

lhgurlz 5

Saturday 25 September 2010 22:28

moms know best

haitilover 0

Saturday 25 September 2010 22:34

sux

cali_swagg408 0

Sunday 26 September 2010 9:19

your real pretty

usjdbxlsjgdoa 0

Saturday 25 September 2010 22:43

ouch. at least your mom loves you? :D

Joseph_Stalin 0

Saturday 25 September 2010 22:45

You should be more prepared for surprise attacks.

TotallyTubular 0

Saturday 25 September 2010 23:34

I read nipple. Not pimple. Talk about a WTF moment.

fuzzywazzy012 0

Sunday 26 September 2010 0:06

HA ha.... Dumb ass

WearingHats 14

Sunday 26 September 2010 0:35

Except get rid of them in many peoples cases. Seriously, why is everyone always trying to prove someone/something wrong on this site? :/

analyzewithin 0

Sunday 26 September 2010 0:40

Was it cool and tingly??? Lol More proactiv, less acne? +/-

mockingjay_fml 0

Sunday 26 September 2010 0:55

toothpaste doesn't help , it just makes the pimple worse !

Keywords

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Today, I let my 4-month old puppy sleep with me. She’s been constipated for a while. I woke up to a foul odor in the middle of the night. Turns out she took a massive dump on the bed right by my head. I had to completely strip my bed to go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 473

Today, my family has been unsuccessfully trying to stop my sister's energy drink addiction. She's not even 30, but the doctors say her heart health (or lack thereof) is roughly equivalent to a person over twice her age. She probably won't even live to 40 at this rate, which makes us sad. Why won't she listen to us? FML

I agree, your life sucks 435

You deserved it 75

The Top

Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 497

You deserved it 2 918

Today, I only just found out that the abbreviation "lbs" is actually short for pounds. I've been saying "labs" my entire life. I'm 21. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 353

You deserved it 55 863

Today, I had a panic attack while giving a presentation on how to breathe to avoid having panic attacks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 192

Today, I woke up with greasy hair, despite taking a shower last night. After washing my hair several times and it not going away, I realized that yesterday I put aerosol deodorant in my hair instead of hairspray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 292

You deserved it 1 269

Today, I got back from a fun vacation I took with my husband. During the vacation, I participated in a wet t-shirt contest and a bunch of pictures of me flashing my breasts and waving my t shirt over my head during the contest got posted online. My whole office is teasing me now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 175

You deserved it 1 054

Today, I was at a party and I danced. Judging by people's stares, I should never ever attempt it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 653

You deserved it 309

Same thing different taste

Ouch

Oh gosh

Double trouble

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