Miscellaneous: Today, I was woken up by a call from "the Nuisance Call Prevention... - FML

By Telemarket - 04/04/2012 10:58 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, I was woken up by a call from "the Nuisance Call Prevention Registry". The lady on the telephone didn't see the irony. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 488

You deserved it 2 247

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Same thing different taste

By wowimscrewed - 14/04/2011 04:37 - United States

Today, my roommate told me there is some restricted number that keeps calling and waking her up at odd hours of the night. She then says she's getting the police involved to find out who it is because she feels "harassed". I'm the restricted caller calling to wake her up from snoring so loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 636

You deserved it 32 859

By Anonymous - 04/06/2013 07:11 - United States - Rainier

Today, I received a prank phone call that woke me up. I actually kept them on the line because they were the first person to call me in weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 327

You deserved it 6 151

By RootyTootToot - 31/08/2018 22:00

Today, I got a call from "No Caller ID", which usually only shows up when someone calls from my house phone. Thinking it was my kids, I answered imitating a cartoon voice. It wasn't my kids. It was the district attorney's office calling about the job I applied for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 603

You deserved it 1 521

Not now, Doris

By Anonymous - 02/04/2024 13:00 - United States

Today, my mom is in the hospital and I'm sitting by the phone in case anyone calls with news. Each time the phone rings, I bolt upright to answer it. So far I've been woken up by two telemarketers, three robo-calls, and some old lady asking for Doris, who doesn't live here. I can't turn my phone off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 471

You deserved it 85

Lonely times

By Anonymous - 22/12/2010 16:19 - United Kingdom

Today, the highlight of my day was someone prank-calling me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 853

You deserved it 5 499

By still broke and jobless - 17/09/2015 20:24 - United States

Today, I saw a missed call on my phone. Thinking it was one of the multiple jobs I applied for, I called back. Turns out it was just a debt collector. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 871

You deserved it 2 564

By Anonymous - 12/05/2009 17:39 - United States

Today, I took a call. Wrong number. A few seconds later, they called back and I told her that she had the wrong number. She said she just hit redial and didn't understand how she got me again. I tried to explain how redial works. She called me a moron and hung up. Then my phone rang again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109 962

You deserved it 6 114

Gotcha!

By Anonymous - 08/05/2014 03:57 - United States - State College

Today, while at work as a telemarketer, I called a customer on his home phone. Once I was connected, an automated voice said, "To speak with a customer, please press 1." Confused, I pressed one. I then heard loud laughter followed by, "Oh my god! What a dumbass!" before they hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 299

You deserved it 23 127

By Grandson - 01/01/2012 13:51 - Australia

Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 877

You deserved it 2 745

Thanks mom

By Anonymous - 27/01/2017 00:00

Today, I checked my inbox and realized I got an email from a potential employer, saying they were having trouble getting a hold of me by phone. They called while my mom was using my phone to look up directions to a place, and she answered, kindly hanging up when they asked for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 674

You deserved it 487

Next

Top comments

DocBastard 38

Wednesday 4 April 2012 19:31

Woman: Hello, this is the Nuisance Call Prevention Registry. Have I called you at a good time? OP: **** you, I'm sleeping. Woman: Excuse me? OP: I SAID **** YOU! Woman: Congratulations, you're now officially a nuisance.

old09 11

Wednesday 4 April 2012 19:30

Probably because "it's not her job to have a sense I humour" Damn peoples

Comments

XtraEzeee 8

Thursday 5 April 2012 7:46

"If they're male or female.." As opposed to what? Transgender?

erock1star 8

Monday 9 April 2012 22:17

Oh, the IRONY

sissors1234 4

Tuesday 5 June 2012 3:52

O I get it now

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The Top

Today, I woke up from a night of serious depression, drinking by myself at home, to find a USB stick wrapped in plastic up my vagina, with "Top secret" written on it. There was nothing on the stick when I checked. I may need to give tequila a rest and switch back to gin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 1 832

Today, yet again I had to lie to a date about what I do for a living, because every time I tell someone the truth, that I work in private equity, they have some choice words about "people like me ruining things" and "ruining the housing prices." I feel like an evil James Bond or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 552

The Top

Today, it's my birthday and I celebrated with friends. I now have 34 individual copies of the first Twilight movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 832

You deserved it 1 885

Today, I was having sex with this girl I met in stats class when my roommate walked in. He started applauding and said, "$20 bucks for me! I knew you weren't gay!" Him and my other roommate had a bet. They are my best friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 887

You deserved it 8 785

Today, I found my sister licking all of the silverware and putting it back in the drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 876

You deserved it 2 634

Today, there's a boy in my high school who is being bullied because he is left-handed. Repeat: HE'S LEFTY. Are you fucking kidding me? FML

I agree, your life sucks 987

You deserved it 133

Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 537

You deserved it 51 160

Today, while cleaning behind a ladder, I banged my head on one of the hand rails. I stood up, cursed, and moved to the other side. To my luck, I hit the other side of my head. I now have two lumps perfectly placed as horns on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 665

You deserved it 6 748