Work: Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a... - FML

By bham boy - 20/04/2011 08:10

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 376

You deserved it 33 760

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Same thing different taste

Stick hot mess

By Anonymous - 27/01/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I went to a job interview and, feeling nervous, accidentally knocked over the interviewer's Mountain Dew. Trying to recover, I blurted out, "Don't worry, I'm used to cleaning up messes." The awkward silence that followed made it clear I wouldn't be cleaning up anything in their office. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 155

By Zanna - 23/03/2017 12:00

Today, a job candidate I was interviewing took a drink of water, and let it dribble down her chin and shirt while making fixed eye contact with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 420

You deserved it 284

By Anonymous - 17/04/2013 15:25 - United States

Today, I had a job interview with a man that I got drunk with at a bar on Saturday night. He spent an hour telling me things I did that I don't even remember. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 429

You deserved it 21 604

Boozy

By hhhhhhh - 21/04/2022 12:00

Today, I had an interview for my dream job. Things were going well, the lady was about to offer me the job, but then I got the hiccups. She immediately changed her tone and said, “Yeah, I think we’re done here. Next time, don’t show up to a job interview drunk.” I had no alcohol in my system. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 558

You deserved it 98

Honest

By Anonymous - 04/09/2024 22:00 - Australia

Today, I had a job interview that I really wanted to nail. Everything was great until the interviewer asked me why I left my last job. I meant to say, "I felt it was time for a new challenge," but instead I said, "I felt tired of pretending to care." The look on their face was priceless. Needless to say, but I don't think I'll get the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 132

You deserved it 527

By Anonyme - 29/05/2012 10:19

Today, I went to my first ever job interview, in a totally stressed out state. The employer's first question was: "What's your name?" I forgot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 842

You deserved it 9 951

Double take

By Anonymous - 01/04/2022 02:00

Today, I walked into a job interview, then turned round and walked back out again. The interviewer was a one-night stand that ended very badly months ago, and she remembered me. I could see in her face the interview was pointless, so instead of grovelling I went to the pub to drown my sorrows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 183

You deserved it 537

Am I hired?

By KLM - 14/08/2024 14:00 - United Kingdom - Manchester

Today, I had a job interview. As I walked in, I confidently shook the interviewer's hand, only to say, "I'm doing well, how are you?" before she'd even asked me how I was, or even said anything. The rest of the interview was pretty much a blur of awkwardness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 301

You deserved it 226

By Cup_of___ - 26/11/2009 16:23 - United States

Today, I walked into a liquor store and thought about inquiring for a job application. After seeing the cashier, I thought about inquiring if she was single. After accidentally breaking three bottles of liquor, I didn't do either. I left the store, still single and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 939

You deserved it 30 136

Riveting

By Kebabjoon - 29/04/2011 11:36 - Spain

Today, I had my first job interview for eight months. My interviewer noticeably yawned during my reply to the first question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 609

You deserved it 4 880

Next

Top comments

SayItNicely 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 12:06

Did you get it?

lazerdude07 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 12:07

you should have asked for some milk straight from the breast

Comments

greenlantern27 6

Wednesday 20 April 2011 16:36

How can you have no idea why you said it? You know, there's this thing in your head called your brain that controls the things you say.

Miranday 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 16:36

No milk today.

VasilisaUzhasnaj 29

Wednesday 20 April 2011 16:38

Did you also accidentally call your interviewer 'Mommy'?

Amy_1995 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 16:41

I hope you got that milk

lextheplex 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 17:29

lmao I got like 5 hours of sleep this made me LOL and it's not that funny haha!

nerdsgetmehot 22

Wednesday 20 April 2011 17:40

I wonder what Freud would have to say about this.

abceasyas123abc 12

Wednesday 20 April 2011 17:55

This is a great FML, OP! It's hilarious and has nothing to do with relationship dramas or weird bedroom antics. Please keep us posted on the outcome of your interview!

wtfitsxash 3

Wednesday 20 April 2011 18:14

l0l, classic! good luck on the job hunt.

SexyKitten1313 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 18:14

least it wasnt a fake job interview.....

snowkitty19 7

Wednesday 20 April 2011 18:29

ur a cat

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The Top

Today, I invited my mom over for lunch so we could discuss how she broke my trust while she last babysat for me, and that as a result she won’t be babysitting for a little while. She then yelled at me and told me I was being disrespectful and dramatic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 373

You deserved it 110

Today, the host family that I'm staying with in China gave me a small milk box to drink. It tasted a bit tangy and sour, but I thought that was probably just the taste of milk in China. Trying to be polite, I practically chugged the whole box. Later, I found out that it had expired 20 days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 543

You deserved it 372

The Top

Today, my sister and I were eating at Wendy's. On the way out, I thought it would be funny to kick the door open and yell, "This is Sparta!" I lost my balance and fell flat on my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 268

You deserved it 66 596

Today, while working at a client's house, I noticed that their sliding calendar was several months off. I fixed it. Later the daughter saw and started crying. Apparently the date was the last one her mother had set it to before she died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 913

You deserved it 58 967

Today, I visited my Grandma's house, and my uncle happened to be there. As expected, and all the time, he greeted with his signature shit-eating, "I see what you did there" face. He's been doing that to me ever since he saw me masturbating when I was a little kid. I'm 47, married, and have 2 kids now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 143

Today, I'm in my third week at a new job. Using an online service our company recommends, I accidentally downloaded a virus that is now working its way through our website, randomly sending our customers Viagra ads via our email. I personally had to tell the founder of the company. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 469

You deserved it 4 267

Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex yet, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite." Now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 829

You deserved it 5 007

Today, I found out my boyfriend has a back-up girl if we break up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 687

You deserved it 4 504