Awkward, Tattoos and Intimacy: Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought...

FML for mobile
Free

By UnluckyInk - 18/02/2013 08:50 - United States - Manlius

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 322

You deserved it 49 732

Father's Day: Daddy Chicken or Daddy Wet Hen?
Stories of extraordinary fathers, sometimes awkward but always hilarious. A family read! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

For life

By thats_not_good - 28/05/2009 18:15 - United States

Today, I was getting my first tattoo done. My parents told me it was a bad idea. My friends' parents told me it was a bad idea. I told them that people get tattoos done all the time and nothing goes wrong. Fifty minutes into the tattoo on my back, the artist said, "Oh shit, shit, shit. We can fix this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 420

You deserved it 56 270

By branded - 14/05/2009 19:57 - United States

Today, I found out the tattoo symbolising my marriage turned out to be more permanent than the marriage itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 493

You deserved it 60 632

Inked

By damnit - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I got my first tattoo. It's a large broadsword which runs the length of my spine. I went home to show it off, only to learn that the hilt on my neck looks just like a penis when the rest of it is covered with my shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 948

You deserved it 64 719

By anon - 08/03/2009 08:47 - United States

Today, I got my first tattoo. It was a surprise for my fiancé: our names together over a heart. I went home but before I could show him, he said we had to have a 'talk.' Now my ex's name is tattooed on my back. The kicker? Turns out I'm allergic to the ink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 900

You deserved it 76 953

Memento

By Anonymous - 20/06/2023 03:00

Today, my quite squeamish girlfriend came with me to get my latest tattoo. She saw a few drops of blood, screamed in the tattooist's ear, and completely fucked up part of the outline. She had to alter the tattoo drastically to cover up the mess and now it just looks bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 528

By scaredinnyc - 14/11/2012 01:03 - United States - Trenton

Today, I was looking at tattoos and fell in love with a really cool looking one, so I decided to get it. I later showed it to a friend who is a cop. He informed me that it is a gang tattoo. I think I just put a target on my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 999

You deserved it 31 413

New kink unlocked

By sausages - 17/01/2014 20:56 - Macedonia - Skopje

Today, I went to get my first tattoo. Before we started, the tattooist told me to just relax and embrace the pain. I guess I did that too well; I kept getting an erection throughout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 185

You deserved it 8 447

Great idea

By aridaley - 21/05/2011 23:33 - United States

Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 539

You deserved it 65 040

By slut - 29/08/2011 16:22 - Canada

Today, I finally found out that the tattoo on my lower back means "slut" in Chinese, instead of "good fortune" as I always thought it did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 366

You deserved it 59 306

By authentic - 18/02/2009 23:20 - United States

Today, my tattoo artist boyfriend of five months gave me my first tattoo in celebration of my 18th birthday. It was supposed to be a heart with my name in script. He spelled my name wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 872

You deserved it 17 436

xLIGHTS_fml 23

Monday 18 February 2013 16:58

That's why you should know what the tattoo means first!

Kidkaplan 19

Monday 18 February 2013 16:57

You should also get a 4-leaf clover for food luck

Comments

deceivedandlied 19

Friday 1 November 2013 7:05

Research is key especially when anything is in a foreign language/foreign symbols.

jackspezzle 7

Saturday 11 January 2014 5:07

Not the sharpest there are ya?

Jebitesevsi 11

Tuesday 21 January 2014 23:00

In her defense, many women do make themselves sex slaves to every dicked creature that looks at them.

HermioneEverdeen 7

Monday 29 August 2016 0:22

You put a lot of thought into it? Too bad you didn't think to research the meaning of the tattoo.

T1A2Z3 34

Wednesday 7 February 2018 17:07

New life path? You've got the tattoo might as well go for it now.

CakeEater 15

Thursday 27 April 2023 22:09

Perhaps during the "lot of thought" process, you could have added some actual research. Luckily there are tattoo removals and cover-ups if you choose to change your mind