Miscellaneous: Today, I went out for a smoke break. A homeless person walks...

By Kaboom - 21/04/2009 12:52 - Canada

Today, I went out for a smoke break. A homeless person walks up to me and asks for a cig. As I pull out my pack he says "Oh... Menthols... no I don't smoke that cheap shit". I was called cheap by a hobo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 670

You deserved it 19 670

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
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Same thing different taste

By Misky - 02/07/2012 02:51

Today, I was walking past a homeless guy while smoking; he asked if he could have a cigarette. So I gave him one and said without thinking, "Sorry, it’s a menthol, but beggars can't be choosers." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 596

You deserved it 28 463

Generous

By cAtaLanbLoOd - 24/10/2013 06:06 - France - Perpignan

Today, a homeless guy asked me for a cigarette. Knowing that I only had a couple left in my pack, I gave it to him. He opened it, took one out and thanked me profusely. A bit surprised, I went on my way. Oh yeah, that's right, the pack contained the money I'd withdrawn from an ATM. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 128

You deserved it 51 639

By Anonymous - 23/07/2016 18:36 - United States - Ridgewood

Today, I saw a homeless man on the street and decided to give him the dollar bill I had left in my wallet. He said "Thank you" then as I turned to walk away, he muttered "Cheap-ass cunt". FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 136

You deserved it 1 542

Get back here

By Anonyme - 30/08/2013 10:59 - France - Ivry-sur-seine

Today, a man in a hurry asked me for a light. Not being able to find my lighter amongst the muddle inside my handbag, I handed him my lit cigarette so he could light his. He took it from me, started smoking it and walked off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 138

You deserved it 35 990

By wishihadpockets - 28/01/2010 10:24 - United States

Today, I had my cigs tucked into my waistband because my shorts didn't have pockets. A friend walks up and asks for a smoke. I say "I've got something you can smoke right here", tugging at my shorts. The "friend" then kicks me in the nuts for being a douche. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 264

You deserved it 43 252

With friends like these…

By Poor as fuck - 29/05/2019 22:07

Today, I stayed with a friend because I was recently kicked out of my home and had nowhere to go. When I went out for job applications, she asked, "Can you pick me up a pack of smokes?" and then got mad that I didn't have the money, calling me selfish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 785

You deserved it 328

By Poser - 20/12/2009 04:24 - Canada

Today, I was at a bar and met this great guy. He was going outside for a smoke and I wanted to go too. Since I don't smoke, I decided to borrow one of my friends cigarettes as an excuse to go outside with him. As I was lighting the cigarette, he pointed out that I was lighting the wrong end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 228

You deserved it 46 169

By NoNaMe - 04/06/2009 08:07 - Australia

Today, while walking down the street, a homeless man walked up to me. He opened his mouth to say something and I immediately said that I didn't have any spare change because I was late for work. He then said "I was gonna ask you for the time, dickwad". Apparently he wasn't homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 641

You deserved it 75 205

By Anonymous - 30/05/2011 08:28 - Australia

Today, I was walking through town when a rough looking woman asked me for a cigarette. I don't smoke but I offered her some apples, and she took two. As I continued on past her, she pegged both of them at me, hitting the back of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 237

You deserved it 11 893

Unreasonable

By Dano - 07/08/2021 10:01

Today, I was fired from my job for not buying a pack of cigarettes for my boss. I only lasted two months in that junkyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865

You deserved it 87

flirty19 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 15:02

YDI for smoking.

Lizzy86 0

Tuesday 21 April 2009 20:02

haha! thats hilarious! btw, i smoke menthols too, i like the way they clear my nose.

Comments

daisyfuck 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 17:06

#25; Right? When you stop smoking all your problems seem to just float away~~~~ Moron.

buctastic 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 17:08

Oh shit. I know someone who died in a car accident. Let's outlaw cars now. And hunting. And liquor. And stairs. And windows. And airplanes. And the military. Anyone get my point yet?

kurukururock 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 18:26

Funny, but not an FML.

mattmag 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 20:36

it amuses me that your expected lifespan is significantly shorter than mine.

saxmsilentx 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 20:58

pretty sure the person that said that newports are cheap, is totally out of his mind. they're almost 8 dollars a box! it's ridiculous!

badwhisky 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 21:40

#175 Cigarettes contain an addictive material and should be banned like marajuana, crack etc. as far as i know cars do not.

mikaela33194 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 22:37

#173--Drunk Driving is illegal. So to say alcohol should be more expensive because people break the law with it? I fail to see your argument. I feel in policy and in the real world (regardless of this blog post argument) the non smokers are winning. So if you have a problem with the way things are going...take action instead of bitching about it here. Write to your state congressmen and women. Get a petition going. Instead of huffing and puffing smoke out of your ass on this post.

imhawaiian 0

Wednesday 22 April 2009 23:14

Hah now if you had Camel Crushes, you both could've been happy!

daiviko 0

Thursday 23 April 2009 0:25

I actually have an allergic reaction to cigarettes where my throat swells up whenever i inhale second hand smoke so I have to walk around downtown with a surgical mask. Nobody deserves to die, but I have little sympathy for people who willingly choose to do things that are known to give them cancer.