Intimacy: Today, I went to my new gynecologist. He has an eye twitch, and... - FML

By Anonymous - 15/08/2014 03:35 - United States - Brandon

Spicy

Today, I went to my new gynecologist. He has an eye twitch, and every time he asks about my genitals, he winks at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 025

You deserved it 4 342

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Same thing different taste

Jim Henson lives

By Anonymous - 20/04/2009 17:55 - United States

Today, I was at the gynecologist and he was performing a routine check-up. He was a new doctor and I was just slightly uncomfortable with him. About mid-check-up, as he felt around my uterus, he said in a cartoonish voice, "Oh, it's so squishy up here." The doctor turned me into a sock puppet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 468

You deserved it 5 128

By Anonymous - 06/12/2010 14:38 - United States

Today, I found out a guy I work with has an eye twitch. I thought he was just a winker. I have been winking back all week. He either thinks I'm an asshole or am trying to seduce him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 435

You deserved it 23 525

By Anonymous - 09/04/2013 18:01 - United States

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 052

You deserved it 5 410

By manlyman - 05/04/2009 13:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, I went to the doctor's office because my wife and I are having some fertility problems. As I removed my pants, the doctor simply looked at my penis and said, "Mhm." My wife laughed the whole way home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 78 309

You deserved it 5 309

By jons - 17/02/2009 21:54 - United States

Spicy

Today, I went to the doctor for my yearly checkup. After getting my blood-pressure taken, my finger pricked, etc, the doctor began to ask me some questions. When asked if I was sexually active, I responded "Yes". The doctor started laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 518

You deserved it 3 608

By Brianna Michelle Ferrell - 18/09/2018 13:30

Today, I went on a date with a guy and he kept winking at me. I thought it was really sweet until later that night he told me he had Tourette's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 550

You deserved it 353

Of course not

By Mona Lisa was a skank-ass ho - 24/05/2015 15:56 - United Kingdom - Cheadle

Spicy

Today, my new doctor asked if I'm sexually active. I said no. He nodded and murmured "No surprise there." Thanks, mate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 504

You deserved it 2 722

By blehhh - 04/04/2009 03:10 - United States

Today, I went to see my gynecologist. She was writing my symptoms up in my chart on her computer. After a little while, I noticed that she had a confused look on her face and was reading something instead. When I took a peek at the computer screen, I saw that she was Googling my symptoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 246

You deserved it 4 583

Fingered

By Anonymous - 03/07/2023 19:00 - Finland - Tampere

Spicy

Today, I went to see a doctor because of some blood in my stool. Not only is the matter embarrassing enough as is, it turned out the doctor was a young, crisply dressed, extremely handsome man. I then had his finger in my ass for a check-up, all the while him being very nice about it. I'm still mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 908

You deserved it 215

It's been a while

By Anonymous - 03/10/2021 05:00 - United States - Perkasie

Spicy

Today, I finally had someone else touch my man parts. It was my doctor, checking for testicular cancer and a hernia, as part of my yearly physical. He's the only person other than myself to touch my junk in the last 4 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 124

You deserved it 227

Next

Top comments

RenoTheRhino 30

Friday 15 August 2014 18:43

Wink back at him next time and see what he does.

CeCe184 17

Friday 15 August 2014 18:43

What a good excuse.

Comments

xbaconator9000x 16

Friday 15 August 2014 19:32

he?

worldclassrager 39

Friday 15 August 2014 19:34

Are you sure that is not the twitch talking?

twodotgirl 8

Friday 15 August 2014 19:38

haha why is... you deserved that an option

JBChristian 47

Saturday 16 August 2014 2:14

Because to start with, every FML has that option. And to finish it, OP could have chosen another doctor, have some close friends recommend one, or look for reviews on him online.

cheezter 15

Friday 15 August 2014 19:38

Isn't there a female in the room also? Because if there isn't id be more concerned about the wink wink ;)

FMLniick 8

Friday 15 August 2014 19:40

Tell him you have a twitch in your area and sometimes it tends to make your leg kick

dudeman1212 22

Friday 15 August 2014 20:12

Maybe it's a nervous thing.

mkayden 23

Friday 15 August 2014 20:53

Smooth operatoooor

joemud 13

Friday 15 August 2014 22:32

What if he is doing it on purpose

buckdharma 37

Friday 15 August 2014 22:49

Maybe his eye used to be normal, and then he looked at one too many.

Shepardspie71 8

Friday 15 August 2014 23:43

Lol!

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my family. Everything went well until my mum started hitting the brandy. While kicked back in her chair, she asked my boyfriend how satisfactory I was in bed, and if he enjoyed going down on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 279

You deserved it 3 577

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 886

You deserved it 61 114

The Top

Today, I logged onto facebook, and saw that one of my friends had just listed herself as in a relationship. I was happy for her, so I clicked the "like" button. Then I went to her page to see who her new boyfriend was. It was my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 597

You deserved it 4 705

Today, I was romantically cuddling with my boyfriend. He looked deep into my eyes, stared lovingly at me, and said, "I never noticed, but you have the most adorable freckles on your face..." Blushing, I tilted my head to the side. He then said, "Oh, never mind, those are just your blackheads." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 778

You deserved it 7 143

Today, I got a warning at work for wearing my ear studs. Not only have I worn them the whole time for the last year I was here, I was unaware of this “rule.” I also was just told that the female employees are allowed to wear them, but men are not. “It looks unprofessional.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 510

You deserved it 143

Today, it's been two days and my girlfriend still won't talk to me. Why? Because she made out with a mutual friend at a party, and got mad at me for thinking it was hot rather than being jealous. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 810

You deserved it 649

Today, at work, I used my foot to flush the toilet, lost my balance, and ended up catching myself with my foot in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 381

You deserved it 11 013

Today, I took a picture of a carrot that closely resembled a penis and sent it to one of my friends. My parents saw the photo and grounded me, thinking it was an actual dick pic. They refuse to believe otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 323

You deserved it 930