Health: Today, I went to the hospital with a broken hand. They gave me...

By charlotte9338 - 23/10/2011 23:32 - Canada

Today, I went to the hospital with a broken hand. They gave me a cast and some prescription pain medication. The only problem is that the bottle of medication is child-proof, I live alone and I can't open it with one hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 002

You deserved it 2 895

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Stranded

By digressions - 29/12/2011 19:01 - Canada

Today, I tore a muscle in my back. At the hospital, I was prescribed some pain medication. My husband got me settled at home, with everything I needed within reach, and left for work. As I picked up the bottle to take the first pill, I knocked it on the floor. It rolled under the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 537

You deserved it 3 945

By Anonymous - 09/12/2012 20:03 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, my doctor finally prescribed me some medication for my arthritis. The cap was insanely well-secured, and my hands were too racked with pain to get it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 516

You deserved it 1 866

By sorethumb - 15/12/2015 23:39 - United Kingdom - Bookham

Today, while observing a surgery, I was asked to open a glass ampule of adrenaline. Not only did I break it and get it everywhere, I sliced open my thumb bad enough to need stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 521

You deserved it 3 397

I'm not paid enough for this

By aaaa - 25/09/2018 17:30

Today, while helping a child through a tantrum, I was kicked and my hand broke. The bone is completely in half and fixing it will require plates, screws, and surgery along with months of recovery. Another day on the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 246

You deserved it 224

By London - 18/09/2009 08:06 - United Kingdom

Today, I fell down the stairs and broke my arm. I went into hospital to get it put in a cast, but still went into school afterwards. I got written up for truancy because I didn't have a doctor's note. The cast was still on my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 172

You deserved it 3 406

By in_pain - 06/05/2011 23:23 - Canada

Today, my doctor called and asked me when I could have my broken hand x-rayed again. I said the ER staff had told me it was a bad sprain over two weeks ago. I'm now in a full cast, and have to have my partially healed bones re-broken. There goes my summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 936

You deserved it 2 839

Doofus

By brandogg - 30/04/2016 00:11 - United States - Clovis

Today, I was laying on the couch with a cast on my broken ankle. My brother thought it would be funny to shoot my cast with a high-powered pellet gun. It went straight through the cast and now I need to go back to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 747

You deserved it 1 336

By afraidofcans - 23/10/2012 16:01 - United States - Stafford

Today, after years of being terrified of those biscuit cans that pop when you unwrap them, I finally decided I'd open one myself. I'm sitting in the hospital with a sliced hand from the lid and can feel therapy in my future. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 773

You deserved it 4 447

By tylerlove361 - 11/02/2009 05:30 - United States

Today, I cut myself with child-proof scissors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 077

You deserved it 34 033

By diorlove - 21/01/2010 22:17 - France

Today, I broke my wrist because a Nutella glass fell on it after I opened the cupboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 555

You deserved it 4 932

klol_fml 11

Monday 24 October 2011 8:39

thats not very handy

minichu 4

Monday 24 October 2011 8:42

I think the best solution is hold the bottle between your thighs while sitting down and then twist the cap. Seems like it might work. Good luck!

Comments

iwillreapyou 19

Friday 8 April 2016 2:58

I always manage to open child-safety bottles one handed. I see it as a challenge to my intellect.

Keywords

Shopping Parenting Miscellaneous AITA Am I overreacting? Jealousy Social Media Love Kids Pranks Friends Dogs Relatable Housework Work Awkward Embarrassing Transportation Cars Sports Health Accident Mental health Annoying Family Intimacy Sex Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist

The Top

Today, my husband filed for divorce. He also put himself “In a relationship” with my daughter on Facebook. She turned 18 a few days ago. He says it’s no big deal because, “at least I waited until she was legal.” The spineless idiot just doesn’t get it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 060

You deserved it 159

...

I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

The Top

Today, my father tripped over the dog and hit a wall. He was so convinced his arm was broken that we waited for 3 hours in emergency to find out he had a bruise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 788

You deserved it 3 441

Today, I woke up after a really intense wet dream. Problem is, I'd fallen asleep in the living room. My little brother saw the whole thing. Now he's going around telling family I need to get some. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 148

You deserved it 231

Today, we had a school assembly at 7:00 pm about drinking and driving. There was a cop doing a demonstration of a field sobriety test on stage. I was randomly selected to perform a breathalyzer test in front of all the students and parents. I blew 0.06. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 039

You deserved it 102 917

Today, I received my camera in the mail that my mom sent from home since I forgot it when I moved to Italy. It was wrapped in 4 layers of bubble wrap and packed in foam peanuts to keep it from getting broken. As I was removing the last layer of bubble wrap I dropped it, breaking the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 851

You deserved it 48 294

Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 613

You deserved it 4 456

Today, and since forever, my boyfriend talks in his sleep. Last night, he told me, “I like you very much, young man.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 629

You deserved it 60

Same thing different taste

Stranded

I'm not paid enough for this

Doofus

Top comments

Comments