Miscellaneous: Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then...

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 114

You deserved it 3 500

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Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 05/09/2014 16:17 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend was about to sneeze. To avoid getting his new tablet wet, he chose to sneeze right into my face instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 999

You deserved it 3 895

By rozziepop - 30/03/2012 05:37 - United States - Visalia

Today, I saw my 22-year-old boyfriend blow his nose into his hand, then wipe his snot on our couch. There was a box of tissues directly in front of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 466

You deserved it 3 530

Do it again

By thornrose22 - 01/11/2009 00:22 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. After about five minutes, he sneezes violently on me. I don't know what's worse, him getting snot all over my intimate bits or the fact that the sneeze felt better then what he was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 233

You deserved it 3 201

By 911 - 13/11/2008 03:57 - France

Today, my boss sneezed onto his hands and then licked them in front of my best customers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 239

You deserved it 2 336

By UUUGHHH - 05/02/2016 20:33 - France - Villejuif

Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 167

You deserved it 2 718

By Anonymous - 04/10/2014 12:11 - United States - Brevard

Today, I tried kissing my boyfriend on the tip of his nose. He sneezed mid-kiss and headbutted me. Now, there's just an awkward silence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 684

You deserved it 4 726

By Anonymous - 28/11/2017 15:00

Today, I saw my 32-year-old boyfriend of 4 years pick his nose and eat it. The booger in question was attached to his nose and he sucked it out spaghetti-style. He then tried to kiss me. I still feel my stomach churning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 147

You deserved it 588

By Achoo - 15/10/2009 07:07 - United States

Today, I was making out with a guy I really like. Midway through, he stopped and said he had to sneeze. After waiting several seconds, he said the urge went away and we kept making out. Ten seconds later, he violently sneezed in my open mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 906

You deserved it 5 152

By SierraDiaz2097 - 23/03/2013 05:44 - United States - Vardaman

Today, I sneezed. My boyfriend told me to shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 624

You deserved it 9 663

By sneezer - 30/12/2008 04:54 - France

Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 175

You deserved it 7 036

DocBastard 38

Sunday 8 July 2012 16:26

Snot the end of the world.

zachherbert 10

Sunday 8 July 2012 16:52

I think this relationship is snot going to work. But who nose, she's the one who picked that booger.

Comments

angiefilee 5

Wednesday 11 July 2012 7:36

******

noisebox 1

Wednesday 11 July 2012 20:01

Gross, offer to let him lick your butt slurpy and see if he goes for it.... Sounds like he has retard tendencies.....moving on?

aislincalum 5

Friday 13 July 2012 12:29

You broke up with this guy, right?

fmlahahaha 5

Saturday 14 July 2012 17:41

I hope he's not your boyfriend anymore yuck!!!

stimpy12 5

Monday 16 July 2012 1:35

FYL ...... EWWW GROSS

Marissa1586 18

Monday 16 July 2012 4:17

Um........Did he wash his hands before touching you...at LEAST?

courtneeymac 4

Monday 16 July 2012 6:49

Ewewewewew, please tell me you made him wash his hands or something :$

liam_oshea 3

Monday 16 July 2012 17:43

I always do that!! Hahahah

deransc 19

Wednesday 18 July 2012 18:08

Epically Disgusting

boobs1234 5

Wednesday 26 September 2012 20:51

eewwww!!

Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Health Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

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Today, the woman I love, who rejected me countless times, got a boyfriend. Bitter about it, I post on my Instagram Story: “I could have been your love bug, but apparently you’re into roaches.” She posted a story of them kissing, saying, “I love my roach so much!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 36

You deserved it 1 199

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 666

You deserved it 3 982

The Top

Today, I learned that being a twin really isn't that cool. After laughing at my twin brother for getting a speeding ticket he turns to me and says "It's not mine." Confused, I look at the ticket and see my name. He used my license. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 182

You deserved it 4 694

Today, my grandma picked up the phone. It was a man asking to speak to me. Instead of giving me the phone she decides to hang up on him, thinking it was some guy trying to "get with me." It turned out to be the call I've been waiting all week for... a call from a huge company about a job offer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 750

You deserved it 2 751

Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't. End of discussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 805

You deserved it 18 036

Today, I took my car through the car wash. I got bored, so turned the radio on, forgetting that the aerial/antenna on the car is automatic. My car aerial is now bent at a 90 degree angle and about to fall off. The radio is half white noise, half stuff that may or may not be free jazz jam sessions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 698

You deserved it 35 331

Today, my cat has figured out that while I'm good at sleeping through her nagging in the early morning hours, I will unfailingly wake up for my baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 388

You deserved it 4 223

Today, I helped my parents out by tearing down the old, rusty swing set that's been in our backyard for years. Little did I know that there was a beehive hidden in the long grass, and I now have dozens of painful red bumps all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 185

You deserved it 2 267

Same thing different taste

Do it again

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