Kids: Today, I woke up to my two year old crawling in bed with me and...

By Eringobrag88 - 27/06/2011 16:08 - United States

Today, I woke up to my two year old crawling in bed with me and saying, "I poop". Normally this would be ok, but this morning she decided she didn't need a diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 276

You deserved it 4 014

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Same thing different taste

By shitface - 25/01/2010 10:18 - Australia

Today, I woke up to my 2-year-old daughter hitting me in the face. She had just pooped her nappy and put her hands down her pants to "feel it squish around." FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 562

You deserved it 3 442

Stinky

By Carolina R-h - 18/06/2019 16:30

Today, my 2-year-old woke up from her nap with a full diaper, then decided to climb down from her bed and got stuck under the railing, leaving a stinky trail of poop everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 520

You deserved it 248

Little bundles of joy

By SD. - 15/05/2021 16:06 - United States - Essex Junction

Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 788

You deserved it 173

That's not a child, that's a bio-hazard!

By Anonymous - 08/01/2018 09:00 - United States - Thomasville

Today, I took a shower while my two-year-old slept. In the 30 minutes it took me to shower, get dressed, and go back to his room, he had woken up, taken his pants and diaper off, and smears crap all over himself and his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 780

You deserved it 818

So sweet

By Aislinn - 12/02/2022 12:01

Today, my one year-old took his diaper off and peed on my chest while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 196

Shidding and farding

By Anonymous - 07/09/2021 08:01

Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 111

You deserved it 290

Charming...

By Anonymous - 01/06/2018 15:00

Today, my toddler is starting to realize when she has a dirty diaper. How do I know? She walked up to me with a shit covered hand, saying "Poop Mommy! Poop!!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 371

You deserved it 406

By finalyearsofhate - 13/03/2017 22:00

Today, my son took a nap quietly for the first time ever. As I went to wake him up, I realized why. A previously poop-filled diaper came flying at me when I opened the door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 300

You deserved it 561

By applesmama - 17/09/2011 04:36 - United States

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 479

You deserved it 4 687

So sweet

By Mom of 3 - 07/10/2018 15:30

Today, I was washing dishes while my 2-year-old was napping… or so I thought. When I finished and went to check on her, I found she'd taken off her diaper and smeared poop all over the carpet. She must have been up a while because it was everywhere. I spent the next hour scrubbing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 955

You deserved it 435

magentaballoon15 8

Monday 27 June 2011 23:03

now that's a shitty situation

Garyy_fml 11

Monday 27 June 2011 23:15

and there's 5.) The assholes who see the overused pun, and wants to be a *****, so they point it out.

Comments

cpcoyles 2

Tuesday 28 June 2011 15:15

why is your 6 year old still in diapers?!

ElphabaLives 4

Tuesday 28 June 2011 19:18

The kid is two. It says "my two year old". Where did you get six from?

FatMan23 10

Tuesday 28 June 2011 20:50

Why is a 2 year old still in diapers. I was trained when I was 1 like everyone else in my family.

demczyss 8

Wednesday 15 January 2014 0:48

I highly doubt that you were potty trained by one. Someone is lying to you.

heatherewf 0

Tuesday 28 June 2011 21:45

just wait till she starts drawing on the walls with her poop. my twins used to throw their poop at each other too. fun times!

Norbury 6

Wednesday 29 June 2011 7:23

LOL - as the father of a 2 1/2 y.o. I'm trying to imagine how calm I'd be able to stay in that situation! And I'm glad we haven't taken the sides off the cotbed yet.