Kids: Today, my 11 month-old son started viciously biting whatever...

By Anonymous - 01/01/2014 05:38 - United States - Albany

Today, my 11 month-old son started viciously biting whatever part of my anatomy he can sink his teeth into. He thinks it is hysterical to latch on while I scream helplessly in pain for him to let go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 758

You deserved it 6 448

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Same thing different taste

Wham!

By Omar Khalaf - 28/09/2017 01:30

Today, when I called my 2-year-old son over for a hug, he giggled and squealed as he ran over to me. He then stopped in front of me, punched me in the bollocks, and walked away quite happily whilst I was doubled over in pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 121

You deserved it 420

By mew - 25/10/2011 18:04 - Canada

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 174

You deserved it 3 236

By MommyProblems - 19/01/2014 05:17 - United States

Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 037

You deserved it 6 860

By buccaneer - 23/10/2012 16:26 - United States - Piscataway

Today, I was playing with my 2-year-old Siberian Husky, when she figured that since she couldn't get to my hand, she'd try to bite me in the genitals. She was successful. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 898

You deserved it 3 562

She'll grow out of it

By Anonymous - 20/06/2022 16:00

Today, my two month-old continued teething. Her mouth is too small for teethers and pacifiers because she’s small for her age, she only thing giving her relief is using my breast as a teether. I’m cut and bruised, and there's no end in sight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 1 145

Demonic attack!

By zombie mommy - 27/06/2020 17:02

Today, my 10-month-old kept me up all night after a gruelling day. I finally fell asleep with her at about 2 a.m., and I woke up half an hour later to her hands on my throat, and her biting my nose. Startled, I took a big breath through my nose and snorted an ungodly amount of slobber. I’m awake now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 568

You deserved it 261

By pinky - 06/01/2010 18:12 - United Kingdom

Today, my 5 month old son decided that my lip ring was a toy. Thinking it would be ok, I let him touch it. He got his finger caught and pulled his hand back. The lip ring is still in, but now I have a huge gaping hole in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 512

You deserved it 53 855

By lon01t - 07/05/2012 20:43 - United Kingdom - Falkirk

Today, my four-year-old daughter started screaming and lashing out at me as I was getting her ready for a bath. It seems my idiot husband told her she was still small enough to be feasted on by the "drain monster". FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 293

You deserved it 2 647

By potatoebee - 03/04/2012 18:19 - United States - Clover

Today, my four-year-old son decided to bite my butt during prayer at church. The entire sanctuary heard me instinctively swear at him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 725

You deserved it 27 240

By Anonymous - 02/11/2014 19:47 - Australia - Werribee

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 990

You deserved it 4 772

magicman13 9

Wednesday 1 January 2014 15:05

Spank him.

AxNxNxIxEx12 7

Wednesday 1 January 2014 16:35

Spanking is discipline. I was spanked when I was little and I love and respect my parents. It's to help them learn right from wrong not hurt them

Comments

MoorePepsi 5

Wednesday 1 January 2014 19:59

So your kid's like a parrot. Interesting

AnonymousBoyee 6

Wednesday 1 January 2014 20:12

Time out, beat his ass something

sportgirl 14

Wednesday 1 January 2014 20:31

"biting whatever part of my anatomy he can sink his teeth into" DIRTY MIND

asherm 15

Wednesday 1 January 2014 20:35

Kids are so gosh darn cute. Muzzle time?

DonLeprikawn 5

Wednesday 1 January 2014 20:37

Spank him, teach him some discipline, it's really your fault for not punishing him, to teach him right from wrong is your responsibility, not punishment for such actions will teach him it's okay and he may grow up to bully others, just give him a light spanking and if he persists up the ampy on the spanking a little each time he does it

YellowSquirrel92 17

Wednesday 1 January 2014 20:41

My 22 month niece is also going through a biting phase, except on top of biting fingers or faces, she'll also try to shove her hand down your throat.

lvg_fml 10

Wednesday 1 January 2014 20:56

When he bites sternly say "No biting" and put him down. It removes the attention he's looking for. This is taught by many breast feeding moms. They learn that they won't be allowed to nurse if they bite. Children don't have to be hurt to learn about pain.

FMLcommenterer 13

Wednesday 1 January 2014 20:59

I'm guessing he/she isn't breastfed then...

Omniprism 14

Wednesday 1 January 2014 21:04

He needs disciplined. Tell him no that he's not supposed to bite people. If you don't it will only get worse. Children need boundaries and discipline or else they won't function properly in society.