Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex... - FML

By Anon. - 07/02/2011 17:44 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked me to play dead so he could have sex with my "corpse." FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 057

You deserved it 7 786

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Same thing different taste

Dirty talk

By CorpseBride - 07/02/2017 04:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked me to talk dirty in bed for him, but my brain went blank and I panicked. I couldn't think of what to say, so I suddenly blurted out, "Do whatever you want with my body. Treat it like a corpse." He laughed and I died a little inside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 235

You deserved it 2 209

By fml_for_real - 04/02/2009 17:04 - United States

Spicy

Today, I asked my boyfriend to ravish me. He told me he would rather play PS3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 271

You deserved it 6 918

By Anonymous - 21/12/2013 06:26 - United States - New York

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me during a funeral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 168

You deserved it 4 518

By Anonymous - 10/06/2014 03:30 - United States - Crowley

Today, I found out that my boyfriend paid a guy to tell me he was dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 092

You deserved it 6 260

Oddly specific question

By Anonymous - 08/11/2023 06:00 - Japan - Osaka

Spicy

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he’d love me if I were a worm. His answer involved chopping me in half and having a threesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97

You deserved it 609

Read the room

By pissed girlfriend - 25/02/2013 03:08 - United States - Celina

Spicy

Today, at my grandpa's funeral, my boyfriend texted me while sitting right beside me, asking if we could have sex when the "family get together" was finally over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 111

You deserved it 5 623

Do that again

By lotrgeek - 13/02/2012 13:37 - Canada

Spicy

Today, in the midst of having sex, my boyfriend decided that, as a joke, he would pretend to be a zombie whilst going down on me. Sadly, the thought turned me so much that I came. This was the first orgasm he's ever given me in over a year of dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 646

You deserved it 7 140

Creepy

By Anonymous - 28/09/2012 21:22 - Canada

Spicy

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said, "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 046

You deserved it 50 911

Mr Loverman

By Anonymous - 14/08/2020 08:01

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked when I was going to bed, because he wanted to have sex. With himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 704

You deserved it 297

Caught a stray bullet

By cryface - 07/02/2014 04:48 - Canada - Toronto

Spicy

Today, I jokingly told my boyfriend he was like an animal in bed. He responded saying I was like a dead animal in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 016

You deserved it 17 811

Next

Top comments

hellblade36 0

Monday 7 February 2011 23:03

necrophilia much?

tnlander 20

Monday 7 February 2011 23:13

maybe you're too noisy op and he just wanted a few minutes to enjoy himself.

Comments

hellblade36 0

Monday 7 February 2011 23:03

necrophilia much?

0671241409 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 0:01

lol I was thinking the same thing

Froz3narr0w 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 1:03

^This.

TripleJumpMan 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 1:21

^ is

LuxAeterna_fml 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 1:23

No.

stephyhull 4

Tuesday 8 February 2011 1:39

hahaha exactly

ahole123 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 5:41

I thought this was weird then I saw that she lives in th UK...

kiwi_xoxo 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 6:11

I should of taken ur warning but I looked it up anyway... :s I would say the same but my friend told me about the movie human centipede and it's even worse -_- I've never been more disgusted...

JManHobbs 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 6:57

Try lying in a bath of ice water for an hour beforehand, I hear that makes it even more realistic.

forza_italia88 2

Tuesday 8 February 2011 7:50

109 i totally agree! i could hardly watch the whole thing and felt physically sick afterwards :S

goldhighways 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 8:03

human centipede was the lamest movie ever

2fLy4mVp 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 10:32

I ******* hate that movie

LouieLZ 5

Tuesday 8 February 2011 11:17

Shit. Now that IS extreme!! necrophilia, coprophilia and all that stuff is one thing. The human centiped is another level...

psychochick29 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 11:25

Y'know... Ted Bundy did that too.

lizzieislovely 11

Tuesday 8 February 2011 15:02

Are you saying that people from the UK are well known for enjoying sex with corpses? I was never told of this tradition...

monnanon 13

Tuesday 8 February 2011 15:31

#1 its called pseudonecrophilia and its a fetish for things that are seemingly lifeless not actually so.

Craziemami_fml 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 10:19

eww

sovietkiwi 0

Thursday 4 August 2011 15:40

Watch aftermath :)

fml2710 3

Saturday 31 December 2011 7:03

is it viewed as normal in the uk?

Link5794 18

Wednesday 11 July 2012 23:05

Till complete decomposition do us part.

Kyakan 1

Monday 7 February 2011 23:06

He just sounds like he has weird fetishes, this doesn't seem like that much of an FML o.0

gintori 0

Monday 7 February 2011 23:06

wow, creep?!

TheDrop 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 2:43

everyone has a fetish. I like girls sitting on my face. but anyways OP obliged to her pimp daddy and played a corpses. Amirite

Guren 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 4:21

no wonder you pic looks like that!

falluke17 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 7:24

lol

pardonski 0

Monday 7 February 2011 23:07

Creeeeeeper.

manzanita2121 6

Monday 7 February 2011 23:08

...yet you liked it.

natvv 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 1:37

Wut.

bazookajoey 27

Saturday 10 October 2015 10:26

Shut the **** up

mylifesucksserio 15

Monday 7 February 2011 23:09

freak

IHeartJimi02 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 6:32

Definitely a freak.

lolfish111111 0

Monday 7 February 2011 23:12

hmm... useless comment

allmidnighteyes 10

Monday 7 February 2011 23:12

Has he watched a German film by the name of Nekromantik recently?

Orange_Poop 2

Tuesday 8 February 2011 4:37

I looked this movie up, and the sequel, and I can honestly say I've never felt so disgusted in my whole life.

kaprookie 3

Tuesday 8 February 2011 11:05

Im guessing its about a german corpse raper?

quite_bored 9

Tuesday 8 February 2011 21:50

WHAT.THE.****.

tnlander 20

Monday 7 February 2011 23:13

maybe you're too noisy op and he just wanted a few minutes to enjoy himself.

morgh101 0

Wednesday 23 March 2011 20:37

true.

MzKylz 0

Monday 7 February 2011 23:13

nice one

Kelita 0

Monday 7 February 2011 23:30

freak

ConfusionsLoveMe 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 0:37

Wow , mean much ?

Iskaria 0

Tuesday 8 February 2011 19:20

Yup, more specifically, a nasty self righteous close-minded bitch :) I know I personally would rather be a 'freak' than that :)

ConfusionsLoveMe 0

Wednesday 9 February 2011 2:01

haha , me too :)

Jizwold 0

Saturday 12 February 2011 0:43

what'd she say?

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Annoying Am I overreacting? Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts Fight Neighbours Cops Drugs Relatable Medication Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, after winning a major photography competition with the prize of an expensive workshop with a top photographer, I learned that my crazy stalker has paid the £250 workshop costs, and will travel 5 hours just to be there with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 315

You deserved it 2 040

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 341

You deserved it 3 784

The Top

Today, my husband was leaving for a long business trip to Germany. As he was leaving, my daughter started crying. "Don't leave me with her !' she said. 'Take me with you !' FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 821

You deserved it 8 939

Today, my daughter has been locked in her room screaming and sobbing for the past 2 hours. Apparently, I didn’t make a big enough deal of her coming out, so I must not care about her. What I said was I didn’t care if she was gay, and that it wouldn’t change anything. Sorry for being accepting I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 185

You deserved it 236

Today, I came home from work to find my computer smashed into a hundred pieces. My dad threw it at my mom because they were having a fight and my computer was the closest thing to throw. He refuses to fix it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 943

You deserved it 3 188

Today, while feeding my neighbour's cats, I mistakenly switched up their foods. One has medicated food that causes drowsiness. The healthy cat got knocked out like a log. I panicked, laid him out by the bed, and spilled milk around his head to make it look "natural." I think I'm going to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 519

You deserved it 37 579

Today, I started a new yard maintenance job. Before the day had even ended, I got fired, because I apparently didn’t have enough experience, and I moved too slowly. It was supposed to be my training day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 634

You deserved it 226

Today, I woke up and checked my fish tank. I thought the temperature was too low, so half asleep, I turned it up. Now all my fish are dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 1 030