Sex, Awkward and Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand...

By Anonymous - 03/12/2012 18:39 - Australia - Perth

Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 775

You deserved it 4 477

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Same thing different taste

Rush of gas

By Fart queen - 05/12/2022 04:00

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. When we finished, he mentioned that he made me queef. I didn’t have the heard to tell him I actually farted during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 586

You deserved it 718

By merpaderp14 - 09/09/2013 06:15 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend found out it makes a funny fart sound when he blows hard into my mouth in the middle of making out. I can't get him to stop doing it every time we kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 117

You deserved it 5 971

By anonymous - 20/03/2012 22:33 - Canada - Saint John's

Today, my boyfriend discovered you can send sound clips as text messages. So far I've heard 5 of his farts in the past half hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 340

You deserved it 4 024

Gas wars

By Ali - 04/10/2020 23:02

Today, my boyfriend came over for the first time and we were alone. He was being super romantic and snuggling with me, and then out of nowhere he let out the biggest fart I've ever heard. He then explained how I should try to compete with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 119

You deserved it 383

By Madi - 30/11/2011 17:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend discovered that I fart when I'm tickled enough. The best part was when he decided to show his family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 737

You deserved it 3 624

Squelching the night away

By alison - 04/07/2015 05:02 - United States

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. All the magic vanished when I kept queefing every time he thrust into me. We made it about 10 seconds before he broke down into hysterical laughter and lost his boner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 015

You deserved it 4 949

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 23/11/2023 09:00 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, my hubby thought he made me queef during sex. I was too embarrassed ro tell him it was a fart I was holding in, but couldn’t once I orgsmed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 284

You deserved it 163

Fetish

By Anonymous - 25/07/2019 12:00

Today, my boyfriend and I finally had sex. The entire time he kept begging me to fart, especially on him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 571

You deserved it 290

By sickyandiknowit - 08/11/2014 07:36 - United States - Eugene

Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 117

You deserved it 4 855

Deal or no Deal

By Anonymous - 16/04/2020 02:00

Today, my boyfriend's farts got so bad that we made a deal: every day that he doesn't fart, he gets a blowjob. Suddenly, he's not letting gas out anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 995

You deserved it 2 105

bestnameright 14

Monday 3 December 2012 23:24

Reminds me of the FML where the girl pees when the boyfriend touches her in the belly button.

petitezombie_fml 0

Monday 3 December 2012 23:24

Is your boyfriend sixteen?

Comments

skyeyez9 24

Tuesday 4 December 2012 0:07

Too bad you can't squeeze his penis and make it fart. Its not fair!

BlowinChronic 18

Tuesday 4 December 2012 2:34

I think I'd go soft almost immediately...

Senseless_487 29

Tuesday 4 December 2012 4:39

Think about what 73 said, and you'll know how most girls feel when they queef. It's usually an instant mood killer.

Steve95401 49

Tuesday 4 December 2012 0:07

OP's boyfriend is turning her into a fist puppet.

kaizersfan 8

Tuesday 4 December 2012 0:07

hahaha that's nasty

amerikaninfidel 2

Tuesday 4 December 2012 0:15

Just try to "queef" him a few times, I bet he would stop then.

seg7533 1

Tuesday 4 December 2012 0:48

Eh. I can do that on command anyway. No biggie. He'll get tired of it eventually.

rebelliousshroom 12

Tuesday 4 December 2012 0:49

I would dump the dork...

kayaker83 4

Tuesday 4 December 2012 0:52

I honestly don't understand some guys. You could always do the same on his butt hole and see if he likes it ;)

sheldon_cooper_fml 10

Tuesday 4 December 2012 1:08

Queef rhymes with beef!! Enjoy your dinner mothafuckaaas

ICastillo 24

Tuesday 4 December 2012 1:11

Yeah I didn't mean body appearance, but how our body reacts to certain things which we still shouldn't be embarrassed, but you're right. You can put the claws away I gladly surrender my side of the argument.