Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend pulled on my pubes and made 'engine starting'... - FML

By dahs - 03/04/2011 11:27 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend pulled on my pubes and made 'engine starting' noises. This was his attempt at foreplay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 608

You deserved it 15 234

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Same thing different taste

By megaladon - 28/06/2010 08:12 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 892

You deserved it 37 459

By Anonymous - 17/10/2010 05:55 - United States

Spicy

Today, I saw my boyfriend shaving his pubic hair before we had sex. This would be fine, except he was saying "Nom nom nom, I eat cock hairs" to his electric razor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 969

You deserved it 8 827

By Sugao - 10/12/2008 07:48 - France

Spicy

Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 077

You deserved it 7 636

Woof woof

By kjdhfakjs - 20/05/2010 18:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 445

You deserved it 6 707

Groucho

By beardedlady - 02/07/2011 06:44 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 123

You deserved it 5 251

By Prinpette - 20/09/2011 21:20 - France

Spicy

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 352

You deserved it 40 479

By S…… - 09/01/2011 10:18 - Singapore

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 391

You deserved it 5 766

Found it

By Anonymous - 01/02/2022 20:01

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend was about to go down on me as foreplay before losing his virginity and he actually poked my clitoris and said, "What’s this thing?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 814

You deserved it 437

By halloweed - 16/11/2011 05:27 - United States

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when he suddenly pulls out and says, "Pull my penis." So I pulled his penis and he farted. Then he started doing it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 422

You deserved it 7 603

Beauty standards

By Anonymous - 08/05/2023 03:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 686

You deserved it 527

Next

Top comments

cmfh88 0

Sunday 3 April 2011 19:46

pubes? gross...

SuperWasian 0

Monday 4 April 2011 0:03

Love how most people on here are disgusted with pubic hair. Not everyone likes to shave everything off. And jeez, it's natural. Calm down. And guys need to stop expecting every girl to shave everything. Keep watching your **** if you wanna see completely hairless girls.

Comments

odexy 12

Monday 4 April 2011 1:54

Wooow, what a bunch of immature fuckwits there are here. "Ew, pubes! Grrrooosss!" How on earth are pubes gross? The only gross thing I see here are the people who think prepubescent looking ****** is hot.

TWOINTHEPINKONEI 0

Monday 4 April 2011 2:12

hahaha awesome

jeannebug 0

Monday 4 April 2011 2:17

WTF ?!

musiclover7502 0

Monday 4 April 2011 2:20

hahaha points for old FML(:

JLY_fml 0

Monday 4 April 2011 2:32

why are they long enough to be pulled on .. that's gross!!!

Brokenheartedfor 0

Monday 4 April 2011 2:38

Someone needs a trim! Vroomvroom;) is he mentally impaired?

sweetpea8525 0

Monday 4 April 2011 2:40

4;(,8

MelissaMae 0

Monday 4 April 2011 2:59

hahahhaha he's awesome. maybe you should shave?

junoemilymae 6

Monday 4 April 2011 3:00

i kno shaving is a pain in the ass bt uh dnt u feel kinda gross when it gets to the point where theyre long enuf to b pulled on??

dwilhelm 7

Monday 4 April 2011 3:00

that'll teach you to shave more often. lol

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Keywords

Friends Love Awkward Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Parenting Kids Family Cats DIY Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management Poopoo peepee Coworkers Frustration Capitalism ADHD Dogs Animals Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 003

You deserved it 42 708

Today, I finally got an interview for the job I want. The interviewer looked at my resumé and asked, "So, what have you been doing for the past 10 years?" I guess binge-watching Netflix wasn't the right answer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 1 118

The Top

Today, feeling very distant from my daughter recently, I decided to sneak a peek in her diary to see what was on her mind. The book was apparently one of those that play the sound of a woman screaming when opened improperly, and alerted everyone in the house to my actions. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 791

You deserved it 62 314

Today, my friends barged in at 8am with the entire day planned out. Apparently they thought I was bluffing when I said I didn't want a bachelorette party. I've been working overtime for weeks straight and am so exhausted I can hardly handle the planning of the wedding itself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 015

You deserved it 354

Today, I've been horribly sick with a stomach virus. Six hours ago, I asked my husband to go to the store and get me a few things that would help ease my misery. He's still in bed and I'm cleaning the house in between bouts of vomiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 508

You deserved it 361

Today, as a joke, my husband filled my son's airtight water bottle with seltzer water before we went to kindergarten. The top blew off when he tried to drink, hitting him in the nose and spraying him with cold water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 514

You deserved it 133

Today, I received an email saying that the present I ordered for my girlfriend's birthday will be a week late, which makes it a week late for her birthday. I sat down and said we needed to talk, she burst into tears and apologised for 'sleeping with him,' I just wanted to tell her it would be late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 538

You deserved it 2 886

Today, I was driving home from college when I saw a couple of sporty chicks jogging on the side of the road. I honked at them and yelled suggestively as I do at college, which usually gets a fun flirty reaction from college girls. It was my next-door neighbor and her 11 year old daughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 521

You deserved it 56 666