Love: Today, my boyfriend texted me saying he had left a surprise on...

By Anonymous - 09/01/2012 02:41 - United States

Today, my boyfriend texted me saying he had left a surprise on my driveway. Thinking it was something special, I went outside to look. It was a little bag of mayonnaise packets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 099

You deserved it 3 951

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Same thing different taste

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 19/03/2023 16:00 - United Kingdom - Newcastle

Today, I wanted to surprise my boyfriend by showing up at his place unannounced with some take-out food. I got there just in time to see him leave his block of flats with another girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 111

By Anonymous - 25/10/2012 09:58 - South Africa - Cape Town

Today, my boyfriend found a take-out menu under my bed. It's probably been there for months. He looked at it and said, "Well, that explains a lot." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 714

You deserved it 4 693

By lamortdeshommes - 28/06/2011 17:03 - United States

Today, I sent my boyfriend to the store to get groceries while I was at work. Instead of what I listed, he came back with hot pockets, ice cream and beer. I'm lactose intolerant and pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 938

You deserved it 8 306

By Lilie - 17/12/2008 10:25 - France

Today, my boyfriend came round to drop off some underwear, which I'd left at his house. Not all of what he brought was mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 368

You deserved it 2 511

Good one

By Anonymous - 16/12/2012 00:06 - United Kingdom - London

Today, on the way out to buy groceries, my boyfriend asked if I'd like him to buy some of my favourite flowers. Happy with his rare show of affection, I said yes. When he returned, he gave me a bag of our usual brand of flour and laughed hysterically in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 296

You deserved it 4 386

By Eet- - 13/10/2011 19:20 - United Kingdom

Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 202

You deserved it 4 250

By k.love - 22/06/2010 12:59 - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's apartment to surprise him with breakfast only to find that his other girlfriend had beat me to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 542

You deserved it 4 360

By Anonymous - 03/05/2016 21:47 - United States - Eugene

Today, I got off work early to go home and surprise my girlfriend with lunch, only to come home to her in the middle of packing up all of her stuff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 926

You deserved it 1 281

I'm surprised

By Anonymous - 29/02/2024 14:00 - United States - Washington

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend at his house. Apparently, I ruined the surprise party he'd planned for me, and now he’s upset with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 469

You deserved it 105

By Noname - 17/01/2009 13:31 - United States

Today, my boyfriend texted me, asking if I had left my underwear over at his place. No, no I didn't. They weren't mine. Awesome. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 308

You deserved it 2 145

steviesnm 6

Monday 9 January 2012 8:52

Do you have a dog? They're pretty good at leaving surprises on driveways also.

StoryOfTheYear 14

Monday 9 January 2012 8:55

Not quite a new Lexus?

Comments

lolmonster34 0

Monday 9 January 2012 11:22

Your lucky it wasn't another "something special" ;)

Pelreskovich 11

Monday 9 January 2012 11:36

Get a new boyfriend.

profoundkisses 18

Monday 9 January 2012 12:04

Nice one

ArcticPuppet 0

Monday 9 January 2012 13:28

For some odd reason, I would have wanted this. Considering the fact that I'm out of Mayo

Capt_Awesome137 0

Monday 9 January 2012 14:01

Boyfriend left it? Maybe not mayonnaise...

ThomasScott 7

Monday 9 January 2012 14:08

Nice! Lol

Ins_Knie 2

Monday 9 January 2012 14:31

...and at Chick-Fil-A where he works somebody was surprised to find a little bag with rings, earrings and a necklace among the condiments.

night_saint 5

Monday 9 January 2012 14:34

do you eat a lot of sandwiches?

kimmi41509 10

Monday 9 January 2012 14:43

Aw how romantic

acidburnz1107 10

Monday 9 January 2012 16:59

Would you have perfered 30 packets of ketchup? (Big Daddy reference)

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend is presently out of town on business. I thought I was doing pretty good at not missing her, then I woke up refreshed and ready to tackle the world and found one of her hairs in the bed (which was WAY too long to be one of mine). And became severely depressed again because I miss her so much. FML

I agree, your life sucks 307

You deserved it 530

Today, I went on a first date with a guy. It’s a little awkward so I went to the bathroom to do two bumps of coke, came back to the table, and realized it was ketamine. I didn’t tell him, but I was so fucked up, he offered to get me an Uber home but I told him I called my mom to pick me up instead. He left and unmatched me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 1 548

The Top

Today, for the second time, I met the man I'm having an arranged marriage with in 3 months. I'd previously met him last night, while he was mugging me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 102

You deserved it 3 366

Today, I was telling my friend how lonely I am on Skype. He responded by deleting me as a friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 461

You deserved it 11 302

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend making the bed, at 2 AM. And he wasn't so much making the bed as he was holding a pillow while lost in thought, looking at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 863

You deserved it 114

Today, my wife entered in an ugliest sweater competition at her work. She wore a plain white sweater with a picture of my face printed on it. She came home with first prize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 085

You deserved it 4 103

Today, I discovered why my pet bird has been hiding behind my couch pillow lately. It's not because she was nesting, as I thought. She's been secretly tearing apart the whole couch from behind there instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 408

You deserved it 4 717

Today, my wife is giving me the silent treatment and has locked herself in the bedroom, all because I politely asked her to put the dishcloth away when she was done with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 664

You deserved it 117

Same thing different taste

Surprise!

Good one

I'm surprised

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