Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our...

By Anonymous - 29/06/2011 23:52 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to tell me that he was worried our child might not be mine because he was cheating on me when I got pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 984

You deserved it 7 376

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Trapped

By Anonymous - 12/03/2022 05:00 - United States - Mineola

Today, I told my boyfriend I was pregnant. Instead of being happy, he freaked out, then told me I was trying to "trap" him. We've been together for 12 years, and trying for 3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 235

You deserved it 188

By Anonymous - 28/08/2012 23:08 - United States - Merrillville

Today, I announced to my boyfriend that I'm pregnant. He immediately denied that it was his because "a childhood accident" supposedly left him sterile. He has a child from a previous relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 889

You deserved it 5 871

By Anonymous - 31/05/2013 03:28 - United States - Carencro

Today, my boyfriend "finally figured out" that he couldn't possibly be the father of my child, and publicly broke up with me. When I reminded him that I was already pregnant when we first met, he "extra" broke up with me for making him look stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 318

You deserved it 7 422

By Username - 15/09/2010 18:02 - France

Today, after telling me his other girlfriend is pregnant, my boyfriend said we should stay together so I could help out with the baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 052

You deserved it 4 829

By =( - 05/04/2014 17:48 - United States - Houston

Today, I had to tell my ex that I'm pregnant with his baby. I sent him a casual "Hey :)" text to try to ease into things. He replied, "WHO THE FUCK IS THIS?" and ended up threatening to make my life hell if I don't tell my new boyfriend that the child is his. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 747

You deserved it 14 430

By Anonymous - 05/04/2019 18:00

Today, I realised how little my husband trusts me after I told him I was pregnant and the first words out of his mouth were, “Is it mine?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 515

You deserved it 430

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By Willow McGarrigle - 30/05/2020 02:00

Today, my ex messaged me, saying he got his new girlfriend pregnant and that he thinks I have something to do with it. He thinks I put it in her head that they should have a kid together, when he says he didn't want any in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 632

You deserved it 146

By Jessie - 22/08/2019 12:01 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, I told my boyfriend of 4 years that I'm pregnant. He suggested we get a paternity test done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 887

You deserved it 332

By bummed - 04/11/2010 03:16 - United States

Today, I found out a 6-month pregnant woman is claiming my boyfriend to be the father. Even though this would have been previous to our relationship, he already has two kids from getting girls pregnant in high school. I guess he didn't learn his lesson the first two times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 195

You deserved it 16 638

By Toooldforthisshit - 09/12/2018 11:30 - United States - New London

Today, I found out the girl my boyfriend was seeing just before me is pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 077

You deserved it 261

konnermoses 0

Thursday 30 June 2011 8:28

he's not too smart :-/

aliadnan708 6

Thursday 30 June 2011 8:28

wow ur bf is truly an idiot!

Comments

imbboredd 0

Thursday 30 June 2011 20:34

O.o your douchebag is a dumbass

xfailureatlifexx 0

Thursday 30 June 2011 20:39

your boyfriend needs a brain not a mouth

lizthebiz 0

Thursday 30 June 2011 20:41

Wow, I feel bad for you... not only are you being cheated on, your pregnant by this idiot too!

katie060710 2

Thursday 30 June 2011 20:45

idiot...

Jazz55 1

Thursday 30 June 2011 20:57

LOL hilarious!

NinjaInTheSky 5

Thursday 30 June 2011 21:03

How stupid can one guy be? I bet you're soon to be kid is smarter.

devildante21 4

Thursday 30 June 2011 21:23

So... basically you're dating a moron?! Good luck on raising that kid with him!

vbmg152 18

Thursday 30 June 2011 21:41

WTF??

CaptainKristoff 0

Thursday 30 June 2011 21:45

Perhaps I'm a little slow.....how can the child you birthed not be yours, regardless of where he's been sticking his little dinkle?

crazyaces89 7

Thursday 30 June 2011 21:49

At least he was honest but that still sucks

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The Top

Today, I was taking a relaxing soak in the tub with my essential oils, when my husband walked in and proceeded to take the most foul-smelling dump ever. The toilet is right next to the bathtub, so my essential oils didn’t stand a chance. Besides that, our house has four other bathrooms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 946

You deserved it 165

Today, my cat got his head stuck in the handle of a plastic bag while snooping. Unfortunately, it was the bag I use to put his turds in after scooping them from the litter tray. With the bag trapped around his neck, he got spooked, then ran around the house, spreading turds from the bag as he fled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 109

You deserved it 547

The Top

Today, as I was getting x-rays of my arm, I heard one technician ask another, "Are you sure those are hers?" At 17, I have weaker bones than my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 008

You deserved it 1 090

Today, my hypochondria is getting worse. I think it's because of watching too much Grey's Anatomy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 237

You deserved it 731

Today, my mum told me I should see a therapist when she saw me wipe down a remote before using it. My dad has a knack for blowing his nose into his hand and wiping it on his pants, and my mum is the kind to pick up food residue from the drain and eat it - but sure, I'M the one with bad habits. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 715

You deserved it 481

Today, I was babysitting a really bratty little girl. She came and cuddled up on the couch so I took it as an apology. I feel asleep while she was sitting with me and when I woke up she had peed on me. She locked herself in her room and was laughing about peeing on me for discipling her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 725

You deserved it 7 586

Today, I came out to my parents. My mother laughed and, when I asked her what was so funny, she told me, "Well, most gays are attractive, muscular, funny and can dress very well. You're ugly, fat, boring, and have no sense of fashion. Good luck." FML

I agree, your life sucks 906

You deserved it 287

Today, I told my physiotherapist a funny story. She got so entertained that she started giggling and twisted my broken arm. The pain was worse than when it broke in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 878

You deserved it 3 827

Same thing different taste

Trapped

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