Love: Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me that he listened to me...

By Anonyme - 26/02/2013 07:12 - Madagascar - Mahajanga

Today, my boyfriend wanted to show me that he listened to me yesterday: I said that I loved unusual attention. He woke me up by putting a slice of ham on my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 154

Black Friday: Sales and crazy situations
Shopping stories where discounts aren't the only surprises! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

SixthSinEnvy 39

Wednesday 1 June 2016 18:18

Better that it's ham and not his sweaty balls.

myGRAM 14

Wednesday 1 June 2016 18:54

No one ever serves me breakfast in bed...

Comments

ThrottleJockey 35

Thursday 2 June 2016 1:02

I fail to see the issue here.

Sirin_fml 46

Thursday 2 June 2016 2:40

Test.

Dusty_Cups 30

Thursday 2 June 2016 4:35

This is hilariously awesome. Where's the "favorite" button when I need it?

obewonstrangeone 18

Thursday 2 June 2016 16:54

I'm so upset that I can't favorite this! It's so great

vegantreegirl 26

Thursday 2 June 2016 5:06

You probably should have been more specific. ;)

SteveDudleyUK 10

Thursday 2 June 2016 12:15

Similar thing happened to me and my girl. I put a ricotta cheese lasagne on her head as she slept but she said that was whey pasta joke.

Bigus1234 6

Thursday 2 June 2016 12:49

You have a keeper there!

MiaTheMartian 21

Friday 3 June 2016 7:33

To be fair, I have no idea what unusual attention means

CatOnFire 4

Sunday 5 June 2016 16:03

Technically you can't fault him for not listening :P

RebeccaMcQu 6

Thursday 9 February 2017 20:13

How is this an FML? It is a good thing yay ham

Keywords

Miscellaneous Shopping Medication Health Anger issues Birds Animals Embarrassing Weddings Pranks YouTube TikTok Dogs Cute AITA Work Parents Sex Intimacy Awkward Frustration Mental health Annoying Relatable Technology Transportation Poopoo peepee Am I overreacting? Lonely Love

The Top

Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 209

You deserved it 4 811

Today, my mom left the house in the morning, leaving me alone. I called and I got no answer. Hours later, she finally answers one of my calls and tells me that she'd been in an AA meeting all this time. Happy, I tell her to come home. She came home drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 170

You deserved it 3 217

The Top

Today, I decided to treat my girlfriend by eating her out. After a while I thought she was going to cum, but instead she farted in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 406

You deserved it 759

Today, my boyfriend asked me to pick up a few things from the store for him while he was at work. After picking up everything he asked for, I wasn't left with much money so I used $50 from my account. When he got home he then grumbled about me spending all of "his" money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 849

You deserved it 1 032

Today, I came back from a week-long vacation where I had no internet whatsoever. I turned on my phone to get notifications, hoping to see a message or two that I'd missed while gone. There was 1 notification, telling me how many FMLs were posted while I was away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 171

You deserved it 3 347

Today, my friend found out his girlfriend was cheating on him. He came to talk to me, and I was happy to help him through this tough time… until he drank a bottle of whiskey by himself. He flew into a drunken rage and started punching holes in the wall and throwing furniture. Now my house is wrecked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 105

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 140

You deserved it 6 806

Today, the gift my mother had mailed me for my birthday finally arrived. It was a gift card for Starbucks. A gift card that had already been redeemed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 334

You deserved it 2 438