Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear,... - FML

By Wawawiwa - 21/07/2010 23:44 - Namibia

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. After removing my underwear, he started singing "In the jungle, the mighty jungle..." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 829

You deserved it 53 765

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 18/10/2010 04:10 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur.' FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 231

You deserved it 39 338

By nemo518 - 23/12/2010 06:36 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 144

You deserved it 9 448

War drums

By Taylor - 30/07/2011 05:14 - United States

Spicy

Today, while having sex, my boyfriend started singing the Star Wars theme song as he entered his penis into me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 234

You deserved it 10 684

By thetalkingvagina - 09/06/2010 11:34 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Suddenly, he grabbed my 'lower' lips and moved them in a talking motion, proclaiming that "the talking vagina declares war and wants to conquer the great penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 910

You deserved it 18 538

By Anonymous - 19/01/2016 11:03 - United Kingdom - London

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. It was all going great until he decided to try talking dirty. His idea of this was moaning loudly, "Just what the pussy ordered" as he entered me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 310

You deserved it 2 763

Superfuzz Big Muff

By miiiiilk - 05/12/2010 11:12 - United States

Spicy

Today, as my boyfriend was about to go down on me, he held his breath and said, "I'm going in!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 656

You deserved it 9 534

Nomnom

By wow babe - 19/11/2012 17:46 - United States - Arnold

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 093

You deserved it 5 623

Repetition

By Fuck - 25/02/2015 21:39 - United States - Fowler

Spicy

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend. In the middle of it, he started saying in deep voice, "Enter, exit." Over and over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 772

You deserved it 4 441

By disney_dick - 08/01/2018 00:00 - United States - Mims

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend asked me to try humming during a blow job. He seemed to like it at first, but apparently, "I'll Make a Man Out of You" from Mulan wasn't a good choice. He still isn't speaking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 974

You deserved it 2 038

Woof woof

By kjdhfakjs - 20/05/2010 18:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 443

You deserved it 6 706

Next

Top comments

Lozza111 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 8:56

haha, your bf is awesome, stop complaining

ZleveL 0

Thursday 22 July 2010 9:01

my comment never showed ip :( I was first too D: anyways, all my comment was was "the penis sleeps toniiiiight" ;)

Comments

nastassio 0

Saturday 9 October 2010 13:45

hahahah some people are just too damn hilarious!

uwnk 0

Thursday 28 October 2010 8:14

eeewwww

uwnk 0

Thursday 28 October 2010 8:15

eeeewwwww

trox_fml 4

Monday 15 November 2010 2:02

I saw this and laughed

Culnamo 0

Tuesday 16 November 2010 2:43

That's really funny and cute. Obviously it isn't like he's turned off by it, so you shouldn't be so self-conscious. Also, if it makes you feel any better, I'm pretty sure that song was used in a movie during a sex scene...though, I can't remember which movie.

spotza 0

Saturday 20 November 2010 16:46

Can't....stop....laughing.

DaveEPIC 0

Wednesday 8 December 2010 23:36

Your boyfriend is awesome!

didi27 0

Friday 17 December 2010 18:00

LMAO I busted out laughing when I read the last part. oh geez I'm sorry- I'm STILL laughing!!! so sorry :D

Taq_fml 0

Monday 14 February 2011 4:16

its called shaving

X_o_X_ocutie 0

Friday 18 March 2011 21:57

YDI u know there are a couple of new inventions I want to tell u about Waxing and Shaving

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Keywords

Party Awkward Lonely Love Transportation Cars ADHD Mental health Work Ironic Vacation Grandparents Accident Miscellaneous Kids Annoying Covid Health Shopping Cute Coworkers Dogs Animals Art Photography Videos Sex Intimacy Exhausted Scams

The Top

Today, I'm in the south of France and I was trying to impress a cute date at a coffee shop by ordering in what I thought was perfect French. He gave me a weird look, and the barista looked confused. Turns out, instead of ordering a "latte," I asked for "lait," which is just milk. I sat there awkwardly, sipping my cup of cold milk while he watched. FML

I agree, your life sucks 102

You deserved it 497

Today, while applying deodorant, my mom came up behind me slapped the stick out of my hand, and confiscated it, saying, “No one needs deodorant when it’s this cold.” At work, I got so many complaints about my B.O that I was sent home to go take a shower. I shower every single day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 211

You deserved it 162

The Top

Today, after bronchitis and a negative COVID test, I finally went back into my classroom for the last day before break. An hour after I got home, a parent contacted me to let me know her child (whom I helped all day) had tested positive and that I needed to quarantine. She thought I would, "want to know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 046

You deserved it 103

Today, my wife insisted we start a college fund for our son, even though from where we were sat in the kitchen, we could clearly see him eating ice cream he'd just dropped on the floor, while picking at his belly button. He’s 13. College, sure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 766

You deserved it 387

Today, I looked at a girl's profile on a dating website, and it told her I'd visited it. Later on, she sent me a message. It said: "Don't even think about it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 659

You deserved it 3 800

Today, I got a call from my brother, saying he was losing his mind at work and did not feel well. I went to pick him up. Turns out he decided to try weed for the first time at work and was high AF. Now I'm the little brother babysitting a 35 year-old man child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 936

You deserved it 111

Today, I was in my car and stopped at a red light. A homeless woman then started to throw rocks at my car for no apparent reason. I drive a convertible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 679

You deserved it 4 972

Today, I was on hold with the cable company for an hour. When I finally got someone, I walked into the kitchen to where it was quiet and slid across the floor, falling on my butt and losing my connection on the phone. My 2-year-old son had sprayed the floor with nonstick cooking spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 751

You deserved it 6 468