There is a reason I hate cats.

She was trying to tell you she wanted to go outside and poop. Serves you right. Most people have no idea how to understand cats. They constantly speak to us using gestures, movements but how many people stop to actually try and understand what they are telling you. Cats are extremely intelligent creatures. You just need to learn to understand what she wants

My cat shit on my carpet a couple times, and she stared at me while she did it. Wtf stupid ass lol

Yet more anecdotal proof that cats are complete douchebags. Take that, crazy-cat-person ex girlfriend!

Not to make a bad pun, but that seems like a crappy situation to be in, so to speak.

Awww she is obviously really sick. I'd take her to the vet if I were you.

She was feeling unwell and was trying to get comfort and resssurance from your presence, and probably help too, but than the sickness got the best of her and she couldn't control her bowels. It is not her fault. Have her checked by a vet asap

She was obviously in pain. Take her to the vet, my cat acts out like this when she has a UTI or something.

She's obviously sick and needs your help. Don't be selfish. You shouldn't be posting an FML you should get the cat to the vet.

You've heard of Fiddler On The Roof? Now we have. Piddler On The Bed.