Intimacy: Today, my dad and I got royally bitched out by my mother, because... - FML

By Anonymous - 14/01/2014 20:09 - Denmark - Copenhagen

Spicy

Today, my dad and I got royally bitched out by my mother, because she found a bill for a porn site subscription, which was paid by my dad, but made out to my name. I had no idea about any of this, but she now thinks I'm a filthy porn addict and that my dad is an enabler. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 850

You deserved it 5 855

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Same thing different taste

Meddling

By Anonymous - 22/04/2024 13:00 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out my mom has been randomly searching my room. I've asked her repeatedly to stop, but she says it's her right as a parent. In retaliation I started searching their room when they were out, and found porn mags and DVDs. I confronted mom about it. Long story short, dad's in a hotel. What have I done?! FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 632

Thanks dad

By Anonymous - 24/01/2015 01:02 - Canada - Toronto

Spicy

Today, my dad uploaded his porn collection onto our family server. My mom was convinced I did it and sat me down for a long talk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 070

You deserved it 2 438

By Anonymous - 26/06/2015 18:08 - Russian Federation - Moscow

Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 349

You deserved it 41 596

By that was mine - 15/05/2015 22:26 - United States - Cherry Hill

Today, my mom cleaned out my bank account, saying my "no-good dad" owes her child support and that she'll get it one way or another. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 895

You deserved it 2 351

By dadisgoatboy - 11/06/2011 06:37 - Switzerland

Spicy

Today, my dad awkwardly asked me how to selectively clear his browser history. Apparently, my mom discovered his browsing habits and tore him a new one for looking at "nothing but vile smut". FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 947

You deserved it 3 486

MILF

By Anonymous - 12/11/2020 08:03

Spicy

Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 297

You deserved it 604

By Red - 04/12/2014 16:31

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend found out that I secretly watch porn while she sleeps, but she seemed to be fine with it. That's until the next day, when she got on my Facebook account and publicly shared every porn page I visit. My father even commented, "Poor choice in porn, son". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 710

You deserved it 15 039

That was short-lived.

By adc2502 - 02/02/2018 11:00

Today, after getting my first debit card, I spent £60 on porn online. My mum made me print off a statement at the ATM as she wanted to know where my money had gone. She saw everything and cut up my card. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 017

You deserved it 8 593

Dear PornHub…

By Anonymous - 15/04/2022 18:00

Spicy

Today, my mom caught me watching porn, and now she has learned just how easy it is to access porn online, she's sending as many messages as she can to every porn site she can find, telling them they should shut down for the sake of Christian decency. She actually thinks they’ll listen to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 189

You deserved it 256

So, it is not immoral ?

By Anonymous - 17/11/2019 01:00 - United States - Chicago

Today, my parents were arguing about their relationship. My mom, who is very Christian, yells at my dad for watching porn. My dad responds, "Of course I watch porn, I've told you! I have shown you!" He is also the one who stressed to me at a very young age that porn is immoral. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 933

You deserved it 184

Next

Top comments

joeyl2008 29

Wednesday 15 January 2014 0:11

Why does anyone pay for ****? There are tons of free pornsites out there! Trust me I know.

\ 28

Wednesday 15 January 2014 0:10

Deadbeat Dad strikes again.

Comments

jweb1434 6

Thursday 16 January 2014 22:43

Oh who cares. It's just ****, tell your mom to grow up

schnitzel123 11

Saturday 18 January 2014 21:23

hahahah! that's hella funny

DEMONSWORD 4

Wednesday 22 January 2014 4:53

Was your birthday coming up?

ilovemyrickyboy 7

Wednesday 22 January 2014 5:59

that sucks but at least u kno yr innocent

B0n351337loser 7

Saturday 8 February 2014 9:47

8 characters... xnxx.com

Jbrady43 13

Sunday 22 June 2014 0:20

Do u have a brother or did ur dad make the purchase

Hippohighasakite 21

Thursday 21 April 2016 1:29

Shit I'm sorry, I accidentally clicked YDI!

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The Top

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house, with whom I've been with for four years. I've been in Australia for the last two months and before I left, he bought a box of 12 condoms, saying we would use them when I got back. We went to the bedroom and I opened the box. There was one left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 965

You deserved it 262

Today, I learned that you truly can get cramp in any muscle of your body, including that one specific ring of muscle in the back. Yes, I got a full on cramp in my asshole and yes, it is even more painful than you can possibly imagine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 83

The Top

Today, I talked to my father for the first time in several years. I proudly told him that I have been attending Beauty School. He looked me up and down and said, "Doesn't look like you've learned much." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 560

You deserved it 3 284

Today, I got home and threw my phone onto my bed as usual. This time it bounced out the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 176

You deserved it 29 387

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 582

You deserved it 4 362

Today, I tried to be seductive to get intimate with my boyfriend. He commented on how sexy I looked, and how badly he wanted me, then asked me to move because I was blocking the TV, and the World Cup match he was watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 263

You deserved it 17 564

Today, and since I moved to the Netherlands in 2021, I have been learning Dutch ever since then, and have reached a Dutch accent point (Southern). Today I was in a shop and was asking a cashier for something behind the counter in Dutch. They answered in English to my request, even though they were CLEARLY Dutch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 190

You deserved it 419

Today, I found out that I'm pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I saw his newly updated Facebook status, which read, "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 961

You deserved it 7 498