Intimacy: Today, my dad asked me for a word that rhymed with vagina. He... - FML

By nothingdoes - 27/10/2010 17:59 - United States

Spicy

Today, my dad asked me for a word that rhymed with vagina. He was filling out an anniversary card for my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 955

You deserved it 3 011

Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Issues

By Badkitty14 - 09/08/2012 20:16 - Canada - Mississauga

Spicy

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend asked me what he should get his mother for her birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 677

You deserved it 3 720

By Anonymous - 22/05/2009 08:18 - Australia

Spicy

Today, my dad asked me to unpack the groceries he'd brought home. When he saw me come across a bottle of lube, then he told me how my mom had hit menopause and, as a result, her vaginal dryness made sex harder for the two of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 829

You deserved it 3 843

Creepy but funny

By Anonymous - 01/06/2012 20:46 - Greece - Athens

Spicy

Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner so she could meet my parents. Over the dinner, she asked my dad what's he's been up to since he retired. He replied, "Recreational gynecology, my dear" and gave her a weird wink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 850

You deserved it 3 102

By TLT - 16/11/2009 18:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came over to celebrate our anniversary. He had a card written in crayon with my name spelled wrong, and a basket I had seen his mother throw in the trash filled with flower petals ripped from my mom's garden. Our anniversary was 3 days ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 479

You deserved it 5 848

Nice to know

By rejectedson - 15/10/2009 23:23 - United States

Today, my father got married. He left me a voicemail to tell me all about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 666

You deserved it 2 257

Close to me

By Furnando - 06/01/2023 00:00

Today, I called my dad asking him to wish me a happy birthday. Yay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 748

You deserved it 1 155

By anon - 31/03/2014 22:10 - United States - Chappaqua

Today, my dad got me one of those word locks for my gym locker, for which the password had to be a four-letter word instead of numbers. My dad chose the combo for me. It was "diet". FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 211

You deserved it 5 785

By HylianFox - 27/01/2012 04:07 - United States

Spicy

Today, my parents had a long discussion on whether a cut on my arm looked like a vagina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 197

You deserved it 3 067

Curious

By Ghostrui - 15/05/2022 04:00

Spicy

Today, my dad thought it appropriate to ask if my boyfriend, who was in the other room, was circumcised. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 052

You deserved it 174

Recognize this?

By Anonymous - 06/10/2014 02:42 - United States - Rock Island

Spicy

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my vagina. He replied, "What's that?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 441

You deserved it 19 789

Next

Top comments

perdix 29

Wednesday 27 October 2010 22:17

A woman from North Carolina Strung catgut across her ****** With proper-sized cocks Her **** would play Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D Mina There are a few rhymes for you.

seymourlilly17 0

Wednesday 27 October 2010 22:10

is her name Regina...

Comments

ivetta 0

Sunday 7 November 2010 21:55

he should have wrote: your ****** reminds me of china

miz66independent 1

Saturday 10 September 2011 7:01

Large?

Gemini253 0

Saturday 22 January 2011 11:40

That chick that asked if her name was Regina is an idiot... ******, if you pronounce it correctly, doesn't rhyme with Regina. What a tard...

roobin302 0

Tuesday 23 August 2011 12:05

ask lil wayne...he'll make up a word i'm sure. haha

dirtbiker267 0

Tuesday 11 October 2011 5:29

Did it say " dear Regina I'm so happy you have a ******, so sorry I have a mangina" that's all I could possibly think of

Killerkats11 0

Saturday 22 October 2011 19:11

China rhymes with ******

NinjaSquid 0

Saturday 5 November 2011 13:45

Uhmm, saliva? Hahahaha eww

simonelli 9

Tuesday 31 January 2012 3:23

Well that's awkward...

DatEmoFurry 7

Tuesday 2 October 2012 20:42

China. Its all I got.

GooblyYoshi15 7

Tuesday 30 April 2013 22:23

Angina

PierreAlexandre_fml 8

Wednesday 25 September 2013 4:13

Diploma

4
5
6
7
8

Keywords

Transportation Cars Embarrassing Relatable Work Mental health Awkward AITA Am I overreacting? Social Media Love Annoying Family Sex Intimacy Coworkers Poopoo peepee Dentist Health Cute Sleep Dogs Animals Shopping My ex Cats Job interview Clothes Miscellaneous Weird

The Top

Today, nine weeks after giving birth, my husband and I finally tried to have sex since a friend was watching the baby. Not only could I not get wet due to hormones, but as soon as he got back from buying lube, his drunk brother called needing a ride from the bar. No sex for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 207

You deserved it 324

Today, two weeks after giving my daughter-in-law a severe scolding for forcing my son to do chores and babysit the kids on his days off, I went to visit them and found out that they'd changed the locks, so my key no longer works. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63

You deserved it 1 752

The Top

Today, was my first day at my new job in a shop. 10 minutes after my first customer leaves I realize she managed to steal $200 worth of merchandise while she had me getting stuff for her from the back room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 002

You deserved it 7 828

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 097

You deserved it 2 848

Today, in the middle of a romantic walk through the park where we had our first date, my husband actually walked into a tree because he was looking at a woman who had sat down on the grass in such a position that he could see up her skirt. Very romantic of him, I must say. FML

I agree, your life sucks 576

You deserved it 127

Today, for the first time in a week, a customer entered my store. He needed to use the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 490

You deserved it 2 374

Today, I was walking my son to school. After yelling at him for not looking where he's walking, I grabbed his hand and pulled him closer to me. Not paying attention, I walked him right into a light pole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 925

You deserved it 55 276

Today, I volunteered to be Auctioned off for Charity. I went for $3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 474

You deserved it 7 251