Intimacy: Today, my dad asked me to unpack the groceries he'd brought home....

By Anonymous - 22/05/2009 08:18 - Australia

Today, my dad asked me to unpack the groceries he'd brought home. When he saw me come across a bottle of lube, then he told me how my mom had hit menopause and, as a result, her vaginal dryness made sex harder for the two of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 834

You deserved it 3 844

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Same thing different taste

Code of silence

By nean83 - 12/01/2013 05:11 - United States - Inglewood

Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and lingerie, but still my dad showed up later at my new place, handed me a box full of them all, and simply said, "I don't want to know." FML

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By ifeeldirty - 27/10/2011 12:22 - United States

Today, my dad walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex. His only reaction was to mutter, "Put some back into it, son." before awkwardly sidling out. FML

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By Anonymous - 22/04/2011 02:55 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to console my drunk dad over his girlfriend breaking up with him. When he said, "You know why we broke up don't you?" I replied, "Yeah, you were fighting a lot, right?" Wrong. I then had to explain to him that his erectile dysfunction wasn't something to be embarrassed about. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 344

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By fml - 22/06/2009 09:03 - United States

Today, I told my dad I was going to Walgreens and asked if he needed anything. He needed condoms, and that I should call him when I get there so he can explain the kind he likes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 449

You deserved it 5 478

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By Notcheating - 03/12/2019 18:00

Today, my father-in-law caught me, a lesbian, buying condoms. He thought I was cheating. I didn’t know how to tell him that his daughter is allergic to our dildo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 270

You deserved it 490

Don't wanna know

By Anonymous - 16/02/2011 05:50

Today, my dad gave me the dreaded sex talk, but he got sidetracked and started talking about how good my mum was in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 208

You deserved it 4 187

By Anonymous - 20/02/2019 04:00

Today, I was driving my dad, who recently turned 50, to the store and had to listen to him go on and on that he’s having to accept that, as my siblings and I get older and are more independent, he’s having to transition from "sex god to just a dad." I don't know either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 047

You deserved it 205

By Author - 24/02/2014 22:22 - United States - Naples

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Devastated, I told my dad about it, hoping he'd help cheer me up. His advice was, "Just rub one out son, you'll feel better in no time." Thanks dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 413

You deserved it 6 838

By idontevencareanymore - 23/05/2014 21:25 - United States - Jarrell

Today, my mom came home drunk and crying, so I tried to comfort her and asked what was wrong. She wasted no time admitting that she'd hooked up with her ex-husband, AKA my dad, but that it'd sucked for her because he has a tiny penis. Thanks, I really needed to know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 208

You deserved it 4 705

save_me_08 0

Friday 22 May 2009 16:49

At least it wasn't in a bag w/ a ***** and he ended up telling you how he likes it up the ass... then goes on to explain how stimulation of the prostate increases pleasure... and how you shouldn't be embarrassed about what makes yourself and your partner feel good Silver lining?

ArtsySwag 0

Friday 22 May 2009 16:49

Why would your father disclose that with you? That's so gross. I've come across lube in my mom's groceries and I try overlooking it because I don't want mental images rummaging through my head. Ughhhhhh. I feel sorry for you :(.

Comments

Luna_LoveIsGood 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 6:37

TMI that sucks was he defending it or something? but what's ironic, is that all of Us also know about this TMI

daz1990 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 8:55

lmao

Sviiiden 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 12:02

Well i guess your dad didn't want you to think that they were doing it in the butt... I said what what!!

livvyylou 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 19:45

Once again, proof that we need a parents category! I've never had to hear that information thank god and i've never even found lube or anything in my parent's room.

thegoodlifeNOT 0

Saturday 23 May 2009 22:45

i would DIE

lisafannypack 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 2:50

#54: i think that #9 is being sarcastic...

nodbor 11

Sunday 24 May 2009 8:34

your father's hittin' a dry spell......

catballou 1

Sunday 24 May 2009 9:36

Ooh, really sorry about that one...

GrapefruitZoe 0

Sunday 24 May 2009 20:06

It happens. So what?

dragonmystik3030 0

Monday 25 May 2009 4:24

thats cool atleast they have a strong healthy sex drive and he is honest. kinda think that tleast they "think you are responsible enough to tell you the truth" even t ho you arn't