Miscellaneous: Today, my dad is going through a midlife crisis. He now wants...

By fuck off, dad - 02/01/2014 17:07 - United States - Philadelphia

Today, my dad is going through a midlife crisis. He now wants to be less like a dad and more like a "best friend" to me. This mainly involves him constantly texting me, sending me stuff on Snapchat, and saying stuff like "wicked cool", "bazinga", and "swag" every chance he gets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 223

You deserved it 4 794

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Same thing different taste

By Colin Jr. - 23/09/2015 13:24 - United States

Today, it's the third week of my dad's midlife crisis. So far he's blown half my college fund pimping out his piece of shit car, keeps texting me meme pictures, and keeps yelling "Savage!" and "Recked!" any time my mom makes a joke at anyone's expense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 797

You deserved it 1 697

Growing old disgracefully

By adam - 05/12/2015 14:54 - Czech Republic

Today, my dad is having his midlife crisis, bought a Mercedes, along with having a girlfriend less than half his age. I was trying to be supportive, until I found out he is funding his midlife crisis with my university loan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 269

You deserved it 1 561

Get in, kid

By -__- - 28/10/2011 11:50 - Australia

Today, I think my dad has finally lost his shit and is having a mid-life crisis. He showed up at my school and had me brought to the front desk. He told me to get in the car because we were going to have some "father-daughter bonding". This meant us watching Silent Hill with his work buddies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 208

You deserved it 2 595

By Anonymous - 20/02/2019 04:00

Today, I was driving my dad, who recently turned 50, to the store and had to listen to him go on and on that he’s having to accept that, as my siblings and I get older and are more independent, he’s having to transition from "sex god to just a dad." I don't know either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 047

You deserved it 205

By ugh - 04/07/2016 17:26 - United States - Milford

Today, my dad had a midlife crisis in the grocery store over his football career in high school. So he decided pelting me with vegetables and fruits would be a good idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 439

You deserved it 1 118

Mid-life crisis

By theslutmuncher - 14/12/2012 23:20 - Germany - Merseburg

Today, in the midst of his ongoing mid-life crisis, my dad forced me to accompany him for some father-son bonding. The bonding involved me driving us away at high speed after he gleefully hurled a bucket of paint all over a store window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 917

You deserved it 2 488

By wtf - 30/05/2012 21:34 - United Kingdom - Staines

Today, I met up with my dad after having worked abroad for the past six months. Apparently, during that time he's had a mid-life crisis or been snorting a few too many turds, because he's now some sort of hippie calling himself "Memnoch of Pleiades". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 507

You deserved it 2 114

Crisis control

By Cuntlette - 11/04/2014 16:38 - Australia - Brighton

Today, my dad hit his mid-life crisis. When I came home and said hi, he told me to shut up, then went to the living room. He then lit up a cigarette and started muttering about having to put up with me, then went into a coughing fit, because he's never smoked before in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 576

You deserved it 3 374

By Anonymous - 28/03/2015 20:42 - United States - Boulder

Today, I found out that the creepy weirdo who's been sending me messages for a while is just my dad. His excuse was, "I wanted you to feel like someone would actually like you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 489

You deserved it 2 385

Drunk MC

By Anonymous - 11/03/2013 14:03 - Sweden - Sundbyberg

Today, my dad has been hitting the bottle, and will only respond to anything I say in a slurred rap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 498

You deserved it 3 032

loganHchrist 9

Friday 3 January 2014 1:42

Parents are meant to be parents, not friends.

CerSpence 11

Friday 3 January 2014 1:42

You sound super lucky.... BAZINGA!

Comments

brandoneyez1 25

Friday 3 January 2014 15:15

Blazinga!!!

ibanghellokitty 8

Sunday 5 January 2014 6:00

It's people like you that start this shit.

fitztho 3

Friday 3 January 2014 16:11

Honestly, humor him. You are lucky this is the path your father is going down for a midlife crisis. My dad left our family three days after my high school graduation. We convinced him to come back, eventually, but it's still a somewhat sore thought.

MrE187 12

Friday 3 January 2014 16:51

Just go with the flow, because one day you'll try to do the same thing.

mxij 13

Friday 3 January 2014 17:29

But that swag though

sarahbevan20 11

Friday 3 January 2014 21:54

If i were you, just tell him you appreciate the effort hes putting in to try to bond with you (i honestly find it impressive that he even has a snapchat). But if it gets to the point where youre uncomfortable with him trying to "befriend" you, just tell him. But make sure to point out that you appreciate the effort.

disneyguy 4

Saturday 4 January 2014 2:36

My dad had a midlife crisis that involved a bottle of vodka a day quitting his job relentlessly beating the shit out of me and moving to Thailand be lucky for what you have