Gross, Cats and Animals: Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat... - FML

By coolbeans123 - 10/05/2011 16:37 - Singapore

Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat vomited. Covered it up with a bowl so you can clean it when you come home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 518

You deserved it 7 717

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/10/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, at work I got an urgent message from my boyfriend that there was an emergency and I should come home immediately. I took my last personal day of the month and drove the half-hour home. The emergency? The cat had vomited on the comforter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 520

You deserved it 3 597

Great start to the day

By Anonymous - 04/04/2021 20:00

Today, I went into my parents' room after spending pretty much all weekend in my their bed while they were out of town. I happened to look out the window, and on the windowsill was a puddle of cat vomit with a condom in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 277

You deserved it 770

By Noname - 12/03/2009 22:08 - United States

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150 410

You deserved it 22 966

By Yuck - 11/10/2018 05:00

Today, I worked a 12-hour shift. Today my parents' cat also had diarrhoea. Rather than clean it up when said cat projectile shat all through my bed, they simply closed my door and left it for me. Since it's in my room, apparently it's my problem. They can't understand why I'm pissed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 364

You deserved it 339

By Stupidhuman - 13/04/2017 13:02 - United States - Sparta

Today, I noticed my cat was about to vomit on the rug and yelled at her to move. She spooked and managed to throw up while running. I still had to clean up the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 536

You deserved it 2 205

By tenniemo - 11/06/2018 17:39 - United States - Green Valley

Today, I’m pet-sitting for my parents while they’re on vacation. So far, one cat has projectile vomited all over the living room, and another has pooped in their bed. Twice. My parents were not concerned when I called, and said this is normal behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 833

You deserved it 296

The gift

By Anonymous - 15/12/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 171

Surprise!

By Fat_abott - 05/01/2012 20:40 - France

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 264

You deserved it 5 561

Signs of distress

By Anonymous - 29/04/2022 04:00

Today, I was woken up by my cat, who normally doesn't bother me in the morning, meowing desperately and trying to get me to wake up. Fearing that something was very wrong, I jumped out of bed. He gestured for me to follow him, so I did. I followed him all the way to the kitchen, where he proceeded to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 213

By damn cats - 12/08/2018 22:00

Today my cat watched me clean and refill his water bowls, then shoved his fresh-out-of-the-litter-box paw in my glass of water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 421

You deserved it 346

Next

Top comments

tencalories 3

Tuesday 10 May 2011 22:26

that's what my family does except they don't warn me I just kinda step in it

GrooveSponge 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 22:35

...I'm not sure whether to laugh or be disgusted.

Comments

mhinaj 0

Wednesday 11 May 2011 23:46

well it is ur car

purplehorse14 0

Thursday 12 May 2011 0:59

I would have texted back "clean it now and I'll pay you" and then never pay him.

screennamesarest 0

Thursday 12 May 2011 5:11

sounds like something my dad would do.

happygolucky3 0

Thursday 12 May 2011 12:19

this was on that website.. parents texts or something

lemonzone25 17

Thursday 12 May 2011 13:11

My family does that to me all the time. Except my cat pukes 20 different places around the house.

redtigerlily 5

Thursday 12 May 2011 13:56

So your dad would rather sit in a house smelling of vomit? Idiot.

jayemdoubleyou 1

Thursday 12 May 2011 20:40

Shoot it.

slushyslime 7

Friday 13 May 2011 7:23

my dad does that all the time when I'm out and he dosnt open the door for my dog to go out and poop !!! then he leaves the poop for me to clean and says that I have a spoiled dog !!! my dog is Potyytrained!! If only ud take the trouble to leave the back door open

hersactually 0

Friday 13 May 2011 14:41

that's why you don't keep stupid ******* cats as pets. they are just annoying.

Smashley93 1

Saturday 14 May 2011 4:32

I feel you!!!! My dad does this to me all the time but I have dogs. Yeah tell him to clean it himself

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The Top

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 41 020

Today, I let my 4-month old puppy sleep with me. She’s been constipated for a while. I woke up to a foul odor in the middle of the night. Turns out she took a massive dump on the bed right by my head. I had to completely strip my bed to go back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 789

You deserved it 473

The Top

Today, I went swimming in a pond. I came out covered in leeches. Terrified, I screamed, flailed about and cried out for help until half a dozen people ran over. One of them was kind enough to point out that those leeches I was so afraid of were actually patches of mud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 487

You deserved it 32 197

Today, someone stole the catalytic converter off my SUV, as well as multiple tires stacked next to it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 797

You deserved it 107

Today, while I was working at Starbucks, a man came in and placed his order. I made his drink, topped it with whipped cream, and put the lid on. Some cream was seeping out of the top. He looked at me and said, "Good… you left a nipple." and slowly licked it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 690

You deserved it 3 678

Today, the girl I've been dating for several months, and fallen in love with, said "We're just friends, right? My mom thinks I'm leading you on." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 930

You deserved it 4 886

Today, at work, I found out that they are taking all bonus pay away, but giving us an extra $1 an hour due to Covid-19. Last week, they laid off half my department. Those people laid off are making more money on unemployment than I am now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 898

You deserved it 141

Today, I got out of bed and went downstairs in my boxers to get a glass of water. I entered the kitchen and said hi to my visiting mother-in-law, who smiled. Only after a good ten minutes did she decide to tell me that my knob was hanging from a gap in my boxers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 242

You deserved it 6 719