Gross, Cats and Animals: Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat... - FML

By coolbeans123 - 10/05/2011 16:37 - Singapore

Today, my dad texted me while I was in school saying, "Your cat vomited. Covered it up with a bowl so you can clean it when you come home." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 518

You deserved it 7 717

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 04/10/2011 04:48 - United States

Today, at work I got an urgent message from my boyfriend that there was an emergency and I should come home immediately. I took my last personal day of the month and drove the half-hour home. The emergency? The cat had vomited on the comforter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 520

You deserved it 3 597

Great start to the day

By Anonymous - 04/04/2021 20:00

Today, I went into my parents' room after spending pretty much all weekend in my their bed while they were out of town. I happened to look out the window, and on the windowsill was a puddle of cat vomit with a condom in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 277

You deserved it 770

By Noname - 12/03/2009 22:08 - United States

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150 410

You deserved it 22 966

By Yuck - 11/10/2018 05:00

Today, I worked a 12-hour shift. Today my parents' cat also had diarrhoea. Rather than clean it up when said cat projectile shat all through my bed, they simply closed my door and left it for me. Since it's in my room, apparently it's my problem. They can't understand why I'm pissed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 364

You deserved it 339

By Stupidhuman - 13/04/2017 13:02 - United States - Sparta

Today, I noticed my cat was about to vomit on the rug and yelled at her to move. She spooked and managed to throw up while running. I still had to clean up the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 536

You deserved it 2 205

By tenniemo - 11/06/2018 17:39 - United States - Green Valley

Today, I’m pet-sitting for my parents while they’re on vacation. So far, one cat has projectile vomited all over the living room, and another has pooped in their bed. Twice. My parents were not concerned when I called, and said this is normal behavior. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 833

You deserved it 296

The gift

By Anonymous - 15/12/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I turned over in my sleep and fell out of bed, face-first into a puddle of cold cat vomit that my cat had left for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 489

You deserved it 171

Surprise!

By Fat_abott - 05/01/2012 20:40 - France

Today, I had an upset stomach. I lay down in bed with a bucket nearby just in case. Later on, the urge to vomit overcame me, and I puked into the bucket. I realised too late that my cat had chosen to sleep in it. He jumped out and spread vomit all over my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 264

You deserved it 5 561

Signs of distress

By Anonymous - 29/04/2022 04:00

Today, I was woken up by my cat, who normally doesn't bother me in the morning, meowing desperately and trying to get me to wake up. Fearing that something was very wrong, I jumped out of bed. He gestured for me to follow him, so I did. I followed him all the way to the kitchen, where he proceeded to puke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 035

You deserved it 213

By damn cats - 12/08/2018 22:00

Today my cat watched me clean and refill his water bowls, then shoved his fresh-out-of-the-litter-box paw in my glass of water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 421

You deserved it 346

Next

Top comments

tencalories 3

Tuesday 10 May 2011 22:26

that's what my family does except they don't warn me I just kinda step in it

GrooveSponge 0

Tuesday 10 May 2011 22:35

...I'm not sure whether to laugh or be disgusted.

Comments

hstarr 0

Thursday 19 May 2011 1:23

haha that's something my mom would do

CarterColbie 4

Monday 23 May 2011 23:37

Man that's totally some shit my dad would do...and then I'd go home really sulky like "Wait, I have to clean up puke when I get home." Hahaha.

Chavezcpc 5

Tuesday 12 July 2011 10:44

WTF? FTW!

TW15 5

Tuesday 25 October 2011 5:24

That sounds like something my dad would do!!!!!

itscare1217 13

Saturday 4 January 2014 12:48

my mom did the same thing except she posted it on my facebook wall instead

xXToxicPenguinXx 12

Saturday 19 April 2014 19:38

I just hate how its not even my responsibility or my fault that there is a mess and my parents just yelled at me to clean up the mess. like seriously I didn't even know it was ******* there in the first place

CaroAurelia 12

Friday 30 January 2015 18:03

Whenever our cat pukes, my dad covers it with a napkin and waits for Mum or me. This is the guy who probably changed two of my diapers. Dads are tricky sometimes.

DongPiece47 13

Tuesday 29 September 2015 4:55

Sounds like something my dad would do. Even if it was his cat

the_bassist__ 15

Thursday 10 December 2015 0:03

Our family basically takes care of the animals. No person is dedicated to one certain animal. FYL, your dad should have cleaned it up. I've cleaned it up when my mom wasn't home.

fantasyworld 37

Thursday 10 December 2015 16:10

He should clean it.

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend went on a date with her mechanic. She said it was to get discounts when she goes in for maintenance. Not only does she not see a problem with it, but she's probably getting discounts on other services too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 740

You deserved it 5 265

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 714

The Top

Today, my friends decided it would be funny to scare me by tilting the portable street toilets while I was taking a dump in one of them. One of my friends accidentally rocked it too hard and it fell on the floor. They wouldn't even let me sit in the car after because I had shit all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 161

You deserved it 3 781

Today, I was cleaning my apartment because I'm moving. I was being really thorough so I could get as much of the damage deposit back as possible. I noticed I still had one of those 3M plastic hooks on the wall, and when I went to carefully take it off, a large chunk of the wall came with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 083

You deserved it 8 485

Today, it seems that I won't be having sex for a while. I was Live Action Role Playing and got hit in the dick with a foam sword. The hit moved my armour enough for a padded arrow to get a direct hit on my right nut. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 187

Today, I have been vomiting for 4 days. Tomorrow, my landlord is insisting on inspecting my flat. I now either have to clean my house whilst trying not to throw up all around it, or fail my inspection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 172

You deserved it 1 254

Today, I nearly lost a hand at work, because a supervisor decided to remove a 'useless' safety guard on a machine despite my warnings. He doesn't understand why I'm so upset with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 711

You deserved it 425

Today, I found out that worms in apples aren't something that you just see in cartoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 708

You deserved it 6 900