Love: Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday.... - FML

By assante2010 - 24/07/2011 00:09 - United States

Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 357

You deserved it 6 885

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Same thing different taste

Thanks, I hate it

By Anonymous - 11/12/2009 16:52 - United States

Today, it's my birthday and my friends and I went to our favorite pub to celebrate. As I'm a little broke at the moment, they all offered to buy me birthday drinks. Which I later learned meant that they would order them for me and bring them to the table, but put everything on my tab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 547

You deserved it 2 931

By BMTH2296 - 21/03/2014 23:42 - United States

Today, I realized how sad my life is when for my 18th birthday, I went to a strip club, by myself, in GTA V. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 403

You deserved it 8 435

By bluntedone - 03/02/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, I spent $400 at the stripclub and got 4 phone numbers. I as walked out of the club, I noticed it was trans-night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 036

You deserved it 52 153

Quite the gamble

By Anonymous - 25/03/2011 19:25 - United States

Today, to celebrate my older sister's 21st birthday, my parents forced me to take the night off work so we could all go to the casino. Not only is this coming out of my vacation, I wasn't old enough to enter the casino, so I had to sit in the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 833

You deserved it 4 437

Night on the tiles

By obese_chicken - 06/11/2009 06:59 - Australia

Today, I went out to celebrate my birthday with a big group of friends. After waiting in line to get into a club, the bouncer looked me up and down and said, "No fat chicks." My friends went into the club without me and left me to take a $100 taxi home alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 072

You deserved it 8 342

By abc - 27/05/2009 10:15 - Pakistan

Today, I took my friends out to an expensive restaurant for my birthday treat. They had arranged for a surprise birthday cake for me which I cut, very happily, while they chanted birthday wishes. When the bill came, I discovered I was supposed to pay for my great 'surprise' cake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 422

You deserved it 5 366

By happy bday - 17/09/2010 04:02 - Canada

Today, is my 21st birthday. My friends took me to a bar to celebrate, knowing I don't drink. I'm now in charge of driving my friends home after they've had an awesome night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 003

You deserved it 9 396

How can I make this about me?

By Anonymous - 04/02/2022 18:01

Today, it's my birthday. My wife took me to my favorite restaurant for dinner. She made me pay for my birthday dinner, along with hers. She also got me a gift card to HER favorite store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 114

You deserved it 164

By azmom - 27/03/2012 17:51 - United States - Phoenix

Today, I dropped off my 19 year old daughter at her first job. It's at a strip club. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 325

You deserved it 26 213

By Anonymous - 14/04/2012 04:57 - United States - Paducah

Today, it was my 16th birthday. My surprise was a new car, that is now in the side of the garage because my mom lost control while driving it around front. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 032

You deserved it 4 329

Next

Top comments

BIEBERSLAYER 10

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:22

please tell me you didn't get a lap dance from her.

HahaYDI 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:24

Did you get some sort of family discount?

Comments

ifeelya 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:39

so you chipped in some cash along for her car now?

my_usagi 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:41

what's wrong with stripping? apparently nothing since you want to go and watch other people's sisters and daughters and mothers strip for money. you deserve it.

ILoveEggnog 7

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:53

Best response yet.

a_nutritionist 10

Sunday 24 July 2011 12:26

the same thing thats wrong with any other job that has sleazy assholes drooling over your sister. while i support the choice and the career path, that doesnt mean people should be happy knowing some fat asshole with a boner has been diddling himself under the table fantasizing about your family members.

rawrface22 10

Monday 25 July 2011 4:53

OP might not be complaining about her being a stripper, he just might be complaining that he saw her there. I would not want to see my sister at a strip club, and I'm sure many others feel the same.

muchagente 5

Monday 25 July 2011 11:10

51 is definitely right: if op goes to a strip club, he relies on someone to work there, and somebody must do it. why should his family be worse than others for the job?

brookig 10

Saturday 30 July 2011 10:40

Oh how true!! Great reply!

DrewsFML 8

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:42

You should've known after she charged you $20 that time you accidentally walked in on her in the shower.

jake3292 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:49

free lap dance ?

jake3292 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:49

free lap dance ?

jake3292 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:49

free lap dance ?

jake3292 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:49

free lap dance ?

jake3292 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:49

free lap dance ?

HannahLouise96 13

Sunday 24 July 2011 11:19

Yeah, we got it the first time...

WallyTheWombat 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 12:49

Is my phone broken or did he just post the same think 5 times in a row?

Cryingraven 1

Sunday 24 July 2011 13:36

Holy shit dudette stop pressing send. @_@"

jake3292 5

Sunday 24 July 2011 15:25

my iPod glitched

lilly25001 7

Sunday 24 July 2011 16:25

yeah okay

xxLifexx 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:54

OPs Mom: i heard you went to a strip joint what did u see that u werent suppose to?!?!?! OP: my sister..

opeagles 0

Monday 25 July 2011 2:03

hahaha thts funny

spanky789600 3

Sunday 24 July 2011 9:55

Did you get a family discount on a lap dance??

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CLICK HERE TO SEE THE ILLUSTRATED FMLMeghan's website : http://www.kawaiinot.com/ & http://www.murphypop.com/ If you want to be the next published artist, send an email to alice [at] fmylife.com including a link to your website/blog/DA. Bu...

I agree, your life sucks 11

You deserved it 21

Today, while I was making out with my boyfriend, he left my dorm suddenly without telling me where he was going. A few hours later, he texted me to tell me that being with me made him feel dirty and he had gone to confession. He then called me a sinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83 551

You deserved it 7 856

The Top

Today, I finally measured myself to find a properly fitted bra. I'm AAA, a size which doesn't technically exist. Goodbye self esteem. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 586

You deserved it 358

Today, I parked in a "Disabled" space. A woman and her kids comes yelling at me about how I don't look disabled and I was just being selfish. I roll my pants up to reveal two prosthetic legs. She then yells at me that I should have warned her before showing my legs since it could scare her kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 024

You deserved it 667

Today, I found out that I’m the only guy in my family that's circumcised. When I asked my parents why they did it, they told me that they wanted me to be “different”. I have 3 older brothers and 5 older cousins. I finally get their helmet jokes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 526

You deserved it 399

Today, it was graduation day, and the very first time I was hosting an event. When I got on stage, I stared at the audience for a good 5 seconds, then fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 643

You deserved it 6 169

Today, I woke up to an angry and threatening email from a porn company. Apparently, I took a sleeping pill last night and wrote a nasty email to the company about how they mistreat women. The best part is that I used a web contact form instead of an email, so I have absolutely no idea what I wrote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 384

You deserved it 2 801

Today, my lips were dry and chapped, so I asked if I could use some of my friend's chapstick. She didn't mind, so I quickly put some on. Only later did I notice that my lips were sparkly. Turns out it was glitter balm. Now everyone calls me "princess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 896

You deserved it 13 695