Miscellaneous: Today, my friends and I were exchanging stories with one another....

By nice education you've got there - 09/04/2013 21:04 - United States - Monroe

Today, my friends and I were exchanging stories with one another. I barely got a few sentences in before they started mocking and viciously insulting me for saying "swaggered", claiming it comes from the slang term "swag", and that they never thought I was a "dumbass hipster". Really now? FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 345

You deserved it 7 291

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Same thing different taste

By probablyadopted1 - 04/05/2016 16:39 - United States - Houston

Today, my family savagely mocked me to the point of tears, all for using "big", "fancy" words like "accommodations" and "hospitality". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 396

You deserved it 1 483

Communication Breakdown

By not really - 08/06/2022 01:00 - United States

Today, after hanging out with my boyfriend’s group once, they’ve decided I’m a “prissy stuck-up bitch who thinks she’s perfect.” I’m not at all. They just engage in nothing but insults and self-deprecating “jokes” without any real conversation. Sorry for not putting myself down for amusement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 821

You deserved it 272

By Anonymous - 30/10/2011 16:57 - United States

Today, I was called ugly and viciously ridiculed by a couple of teenage girls. They were wearing uggs and vests that made them look like a freak-show of bleached pomeranians. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 937

You deserved it 3 174

By mikeissad - 11/08/2012 19:37 - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, at work, I was forced to nod and smile as a pregnant, fifteen-year-old, brain-dead Jersey Shore wannabe cussed me out for being rude by using words from a "foreign language" during our conversation. I used the word "pretentious." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 303

You deserved it 2 484

Crusin' for a brusin'

By The junkie - 23/10/2022 16:00

Today, I was taking the subway home when some entitled fuck called me a "junkie", all because I'm long-haired and have my arms covered in tattoos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 800

You deserved it 228

By Anonymous - 11/02/2013 15:26 - United States - Mansfield

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 934

You deserved it 30 147

By amazed - 18/04/2012 23:08 - United States - Frisco

Today, some Juggalos mocked me for the way I was dressed. Juggalos giving sartorial advice, really? FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 381

You deserved it 3 857

Proper banter

By AnhHung123 - 20/12/2020 16:58

Today, I was on a chat site and a couple of cute guys asked for my "ASL". I had no idea what that meant so I asked one of my cousins. He said it meant "asshole" and that they were calling me an asshole. So I cursed at everyone who was actually asking for my "age, sex and location." FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 1 214

By I already have one, thanks - 09/08/2014 05:59 - Australia - Mosman

Today, at the bank, some poor bastard got brutally dumped in front of everyone, prompting some total spastic behind me to cough and mockingly say "Loser!" The guy thought I'd said it, and started shoving me around and threatening to tear me a new asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 336

You deserved it 3 085

By Anonymous - 04/11/2013 11:39

Today, I was telling my friends a story. I added a few "embellishments" to make it more intense. One my friends piped up with, "I was with you, half of what you just said wasn't true". It's now all over Facebook and I'm known as "The Bullshitter". FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 068

You deserved it 71 983

Shrike 23

Wednesday 10 April 2013 0:16

Here, lemme help: "An illiterate dumbass called ZacZ swaggered into the FML comments section, expecting to be praised for his ignorance of basic English words." Does that help?

buddy51 23

Wednesday 10 April 2013 0:12

Your friends should remember the old adage that "whenever you point a finger at someone for being a "dumbass hipster" their other three fingers are pointing at themselves. Your friends are, at the very least, idiots. Good luck finding some better friends, OP, you need 'em!

Comments

geo332 5

Wednesday 2 April 2014 15:13

You need new friends

MissSly 2

Sunday 25 October 2015 18:56

And then I swaggered in, slapped your friends out of the way, and became your new educated friend. With which you could discuss swanky walking and pirate terminology!