Love: Today, my girlfriend came back from her mission trip with hickies...

By isaidfuckoff - 27/06/2015 18:29 - United States

Today, my girlfriend came back from her mission trip with hickies all over her boobs. She said it wasn't cheating because she was doing God's work and that they canceled each other out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 357

You deserved it 2 806

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 01/07/2013 18:03 - United States - Pleasantville

Today, I saw my girlfriend for the first time in weeks. She had a hickey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 422

You deserved it 6 292

No good deed…

By cantwin - 02/10/2023 20:00

Today, my girlfriend returned from a two day trip. I'd spent the time cleaning the house and working on house projects, so she wouldn't come home and be stressed. She got upset when she got home because the house was clean, and it made her feel inadequate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 856

You deserved it 91

By Anonymous - 05/04/2013 22:58 - Israel - Netanya

Today, I found out that my girlfriend has been cheating on me with two different guys. Her incredibly moving excuse was that she was getting "more experience" so she could please me better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 519

You deserved it 3 855

By LonelyHeart - 22/10/2009 12:09 - United States

Today, I surprised my boyfriend at work, only to notice that his neck was covered in hickies. The night before, he texted me saying he needed alone time to get his mind together. Looks like he got together with another mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 710

You deserved it 3 333

By Imrickar - 30/04/2011 05:06 - United States

Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend why being with a girl while being with me is cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 170

You deserved it 7 818

By Brooke - 15/01/2013 05:45 - United States - Manteca

Today, my mother came back from her trip to Vegas. Her breasts were obviously 2 letter sizes larger. I asked if she got a boob job and she denied it, saying that it's against her religion. She's an atheist, and a liar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 498

You deserved it 3 558

By TotallyDoneDating - 02/05/2018 05:00

Today, I found out that my girlfriend of 2 years lost her virginity on a cruise last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 861

You deserved it 752

By Anonymous - 17/08/2015 22:46 - Canada - Kingston

Today, my girlfriend dyed her hair from blonde to brunette. An hour later, she found one of her blonde hairs on my pillow, and accused me of cheating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 434

You deserved it 2 067

By mrniceguy - 23/02/2010 18:57 - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend started a fake argument and pretended to be mad at me for four days, which was almost enough time for the gigantic hickey that my best friend gave her on her neck to heal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 141

You deserved it 2 464

By Anonymous - 08/08/2013 20:20 - United Kingdom - Slough

Today, my girlfriend was suspended from work after she was caught fucking one of her co-workers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 984

You deserved it 5 045

sarcasticlover 30

Sunday 28 June 2015 19:36

**** Logic

dweeds508 24

Sunday 28 June 2015 19:36

Dump her ass OP

Comments

Rammer3500 23

Monday 11 April 2016 5:22

You better mean ex

everythingelena 28

Saturday 23 July 2016 10:29

did she lose her brain on the mission trip? Sorry to hear about that OP

123Puppy 33

Friday 17 July 2020 15:57

I hope you dumped her.

Keywords

Health Miscellaneous Party Embarrassing Dogs Animals Shopping Kids Coffee Relatable Cute Holidays Cats AITA Relationship advice Love Ghosting Awkward Sports Money Lonely Solitude Work Management Surprise Birthday Food Gross Friends Depression

The Top

Today, a waiter fucked up by bringing a dessert with engagement ring to our table. My girlfriend started crying and saying, "Yes Yes Yes!" The look on her face when she had to take the ring off and give it back to the other woman… She’s now giving me the silent treatment, even though I did nothing wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 816

You deserved it 87

Today, on a third and hopefully eventful date, I tried to be smooth and pull out my date's chair for them at a restaurant. I misjudged the distance and ended up pulling the chair out from under them completely, causing them to fall. The rest of the date was spent apologizing profusely. No third base either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 125

You deserved it 516

The Top

Today, I work as a butcher at my local supermarket. I was about to clear my area for the night to find that some assbucket has put “Fuck Joe Biden” stickers all over the frozen turkeys. I had to remove them. Even when I did, there was still sticker residue on them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 151

Today, I got a parking ticket for $150. It seems it was issued by my husband, who apparently can't remember license plate numbers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 026

You deserved it 31 859

Today, I once again realized that I have no idea what I am supposed to do in this life, and don't know what to do with myself. I just live because that's the easiest thing to do, and try to entertain myself while searching for meaning. The meaning to my life; what I should pursue. I've been searching for a long time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 763

You deserved it 270

Today, in the toilet at work, I found that the scissors on my multitool are quite good at getting rid of a shit-stained shirttail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 617

You deserved it 618

Today, I was in the bathroom taking a massive dump, with the door closed, moaning and yelling to get it out, knowing I was home alone. When it was done, I walked out to see my mother on the couch who said, "I know masturbation is normal, but please try to do it while we're not here." FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 1 356

Today, I woke up with my face flying at the wall. A muscle spasm had caused me to pop out of bed. I'm now dealing with a concussion and sprained neck, thanks to an almost physically impossible feat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 671

You deserved it 131

Same thing different taste

No good deed…

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