Miscellaneous: Today, my grandma told everyone at our party to stay away from...

By fuckoffgran - 01/08/2013 14:46 - Ireland

Today, my grandma told everyone at our party to stay away from me, saying, "Ya might catch obesity from her and become fatass porkers too." I complained to my dad, at which point my gran faked being inebriated. My dad rolled his eyes and said, "She's DRUNK, honey. Chill out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 503

You deserved it 5 708

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 13/09/2013 17:06 - Ireland - Donegal

Today, my grandparents came over for a family dinner. I'm somewhat overweight, and my grandma kept making sound effects in time with me doing pretty much anything. When I complained to my dad after she made a long farting sound as I sat down, he told me to suck it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 023

You deserved it 7 201

By Anonymous - 02/09/2019 04:00 - New Zealand - Invercargill

Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 809

You deserved it 164

Pissed

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, my grandma got piss drunk off two glasses of wine and kept telling me how I'm "so... ROUND!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 427

You deserved it 2 559

By TheFatOne - 31/08/2014 19:27 - United States

Today, I had to cancel my plans to go see my grandma, because I wasn't feeling too well. I called her to apologize, but she had trouble remembering who I was. When I told her my name, she said "Oh, the FAT one." Yes grandma, the fat one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 913

You deserved it 5 563

By poro123 - 05/11/2012 05:39 - United Kingdom

Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 380

You deserved it 4 878

By Anonymous - 09/05/2015 20:50

Today, my drunk grandma flashed me, after confusing me, a 19 year old girl, for my grandpa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 913

You deserved it 2 355

Cake is everything

By Anonymous - 28/08/2020 01:08 - Australia - South Yarra

Today, at my maternal grandmother’s wake, I decided I deserved a piece of cake as it had been a hard day. I was serving myself a slice when my paternal grandma caught my eye from across the room, making a “fat face” at me. She called out, loudly, “You don’t need it Pudgy.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 875

You deserved it 718

Let her have her fun

By WHY GRANDMA - 17/06/2023 20:00 - United States

Today, I was at a restaurant with my grandma. A young, ripped gentleman suddenly walked through the door and my grandma looked at him and shouted, "Look! Eye candy!" as loud as she could. He heard it and was extremely embarrassed. To make it worse, my grandma is a widow, so she might have actually meant it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 703

You deserved it 193

Quality family time

By really mature, GRAN - 25/12/2012 20:59 - United States - El Macero

Today, my psycho grandma yelled at me for being an "immature brat" by not offering to wash the dishes after dinner. I reminded her that when I offered last time, she raged at me for being "condescending." She responded by faking a heart attack and getting me indefinitely grounded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 778

You deserved it 3 078

By unwanted - 26/11/2014 18:13 - Canada - Dollard-des-ormeaux

Today, I drove over an hour to my grandma's house for her birthday party. When she answered the door, her eyes went wide and she said angrily "No, not you!" and slammed the door shut in my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 625

You deserved it 2 936

sierraaaa 15

Thursday 1 August 2013 19:05

Sounds like my family reunions. Sometimes you just gotta "respect" your elders by biting your tongue. Although that was quite insensitive of her. I'm sorry OP that's not nice at all

Kateyez_26 13

Thursday 1 August 2013 19:11

Tell everyone to steer clear of grandma or you'll get saggy **** that look like plastic bags filled halfway with water lol

Comments

Vertetbrun 11

Thursday 1 August 2013 20:13

This is why I love old people.

angelitared 27

Thursday 1 August 2013 20:36

Roofie her drink!

Kateyez_26 13

Thursday 1 August 2013 20:42

Perfect idea!!! .....NOT -_-

lylotrezor 20

Thursday 1 August 2013 20:47

Your grandma is both an idiot and an asshole.

evolute72113 9

Thursday 1 August 2013 21:07

Grandma = Genuis Fatass = dumbass

lwonderful 11

Thursday 1 August 2013 21:09

That's extremely unacceptable OP. FYL

sammyjanette 17

Thursday 1 August 2013 21:12

My grandmother was just like this. Needless to say I wasn't the least bit sad at her funeral. She was an evil bitter and crabby old woman. I empathize greatly with you, OP. The only thing you can do is ignore her, and limit the amount of time you spend with her because she WON'T change.